Hello,
I’m sure this has been covered before, but I was hoping for some recent suggestions.
I made the difficult decision to move my Mum into a care home in December 2020 after receiving a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s earlier in the year. She had become volatile at home with my Dad, I had taken months off work to care for her and she refused any help from any outside organisation.
Then the third lockdown hit, and we weren’t able to visit for some time. We kept in touch with video calls, and the home were lovely and ‘bent the rules’ slightly for me so if I dropped something off for her, they sometimes let me see her for a few minutes where she would present as confused but mainly okish.
Mum still hasn’t settled, and can sometimes be quite aggressive towards the staff, on occasions lashing out at them when they try and help with personal care. I visit weekly with my Dad, she now doesn’t respond to me but adores seeing my dad, constantly touching him and telling him she loves him (they’ve never been a tactile couple).
She seems to be aware that she’s not at home, and will sometimes say she’s not staying at the home and hates it. She won’t get involved in any activities, and spends all day every day in her room alone. She’s refusing most food. She has very limited communication now, and the majority of her words do not make any sense at all - but can say a full sentence of “Im not staying here”
I feel absolutely awful in wishing that she could just be at peace and not remember home.
I guess I’m looking for reassurance that I did the right thing in moving her, and for any hope that one day she might ‘accept’ where she’s living now.
I’m due my baby in a few weeks, but I’m completely preoccupied with worry about my parents.
I’m sure this has been covered before, but I was hoping for some recent suggestions.
I made the difficult decision to move my Mum into a care home in December 2020 after receiving a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s earlier in the year. She had become volatile at home with my Dad, I had taken months off work to care for her and she refused any help from any outside organisation.
Then the third lockdown hit, and we weren’t able to visit for some time. We kept in touch with video calls, and the home were lovely and ‘bent the rules’ slightly for me so if I dropped something off for her, they sometimes let me see her for a few minutes where she would present as confused but mainly okish.
Mum still hasn’t settled, and can sometimes be quite aggressive towards the staff, on occasions lashing out at them when they try and help with personal care. I visit weekly with my Dad, she now doesn’t respond to me but adores seeing my dad, constantly touching him and telling him she loves him (they’ve never been a tactile couple).
She seems to be aware that she’s not at home, and will sometimes say she’s not staying at the home and hates it. She won’t get involved in any activities, and spends all day every day in her room alone. She’s refusing most food. She has very limited communication now, and the majority of her words do not make any sense at all - but can say a full sentence of “Im not staying here”
I feel absolutely awful in wishing that she could just be at peace and not remember home.
I guess I’m looking for reassurance that I did the right thing in moving her, and for any hope that one day she might ‘accept’ where she’s living now.
I’m due my baby in a few weeks, but I’m completely preoccupied with worry about my parents.