Hi,
How are you all?
Now, where do I start?? As, some of you may know, I have posted the odd time - for those who don't - a quick update: my granny has had alzheimers for quite a while and my Grandad has never accepted it and is now starting to show some signs himself. My Mum is their daughter and they practically live next door to us in the countryside! My Mum has one sister and 5 brothers, of which the sister and one brother help out "when it suits"!!
Anyhow, my Mum and Dad were away on two weeks holiday in July there and while they were away, my Mum's family really couldn't cope!! Before my Mum went on holidays she had asked for more home help and social services said that it wasn't available for my granny the only way would be to have my grandad assessed in order to get more help, so that meant him seeing a dementia/alzheimer's Dr, who he had previously got an appointment for and refused to go! Anyway, their GP decided to go ahead this time and have the dementia Dr call to the house. The day before she came, my grandad fell and got a black eye. She thought he was forgetful, but not too bad. She ordered heart ECGs, bloods, etc.
My Grandad likes to go to the pub a few times a week (bearing in mind he is 82 years of age!), which no-one likes to begrudge him since no-one knows how much longer he'll be alive and well. But he still thinks he's a young man and drinks far too much and comes home in a bit of a mess. Which doesn't help my poor granny! While my parents were away he got particularly drunk one night, and during that night my Granny left the house at 2am! If he had of been sober, he would've heard her leaving! Therefore, this caused quite an argument and since that my Mum's sister has refused to speak to him!! Which means she doesn't go to see my Granny when he's in the house!! Which also means my Mum has EVERYTHING to do.
This past few weeks, my Grandad has been very grumpy over his pension - you know how there isn't any pension books anymore and it is now a post office card account? Well, he can't understand this.......my Mum goes to the post office every week and gets my granny and Grandads pension - she keeps my granny's coz she knows my Granny will hide it and uses it for shopping, etc but my mum always gives my grandad his money. Well, this morning my grandad had an argument with my Mum saying he had no money (even though she gave it to him yesterday) and he was sick of having to beg her for his pension, he also asked for his 'pension book' so he could go and get it himself!! My Mum gave it to him, knowing that he'll probably lose it which will make even more work for her trying to get a new one. I got the impression that he was kinda accusing my mum of keeping his pension, which she would never ever do!
But, we have just heard from one of mum's bro's who rarely calls that he was there one night that my grandad had come home from the pub and was in bed sleeping and he secretly watched my granny go through my grandad's pockets and take out all his money....nobody know's where she put's it!! What would you do about that?! There's no point telling my Grandad that that it where is money is going coz he'd probably aks my granny about it and she'll not remember even doing it!!
I love my grandparents to bits but I really hate living at home at the minute coz of the stress my Mum is under and the way that everyone treats her. I also think it is putting a strain on my parents relationship, although I don't think they'd admit to it.......
I hope you can understand this message as it is a bit all over the place!! Any advice or words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!!
Thanks
Love
Sonia
xx
How are you all?
Now, where do I start?? As, some of you may know, I have posted the odd time - for those who don't - a quick update: my granny has had alzheimers for quite a while and my Grandad has never accepted it and is now starting to show some signs himself. My Mum is their daughter and they practically live next door to us in the countryside! My Mum has one sister and 5 brothers, of which the sister and one brother help out "when it suits"!!
Anyhow, my Mum and Dad were away on two weeks holiday in July there and while they were away, my Mum's family really couldn't cope!! Before my Mum went on holidays she had asked for more home help and social services said that it wasn't available for my granny the only way would be to have my grandad assessed in order to get more help, so that meant him seeing a dementia/alzheimer's Dr, who he had previously got an appointment for and refused to go! Anyway, their GP decided to go ahead this time and have the dementia Dr call to the house. The day before she came, my grandad fell and got a black eye. She thought he was forgetful, but not too bad. She ordered heart ECGs, bloods, etc.
My Grandad likes to go to the pub a few times a week (bearing in mind he is 82 years of age!), which no-one likes to begrudge him since no-one knows how much longer he'll be alive and well. But he still thinks he's a young man and drinks far too much and comes home in a bit of a mess. Which doesn't help my poor granny! While my parents were away he got particularly drunk one night, and during that night my Granny left the house at 2am! If he had of been sober, he would've heard her leaving! Therefore, this caused quite an argument and since that my Mum's sister has refused to speak to him!! Which means she doesn't go to see my Granny when he's in the house!! Which also means my Mum has EVERYTHING to do.
This past few weeks, my Grandad has been very grumpy over his pension - you know how there isn't any pension books anymore and it is now a post office card account? Well, he can't understand this.......my Mum goes to the post office every week and gets my granny and Grandads pension - she keeps my granny's coz she knows my Granny will hide it and uses it for shopping, etc but my mum always gives my grandad his money. Well, this morning my grandad had an argument with my Mum saying he had no money (even though she gave it to him yesterday) and he was sick of having to beg her for his pension, he also asked for his 'pension book' so he could go and get it himself!! My Mum gave it to him, knowing that he'll probably lose it which will make even more work for her trying to get a new one. I got the impression that he was kinda accusing my mum of keeping his pension, which she would never ever do!
But, we have just heard from one of mum's bro's who rarely calls that he was there one night that my grandad had come home from the pub and was in bed sleeping and he secretly watched my granny go through my grandad's pockets and take out all his money....nobody know's where she put's it!! What would you do about that?! There's no point telling my Grandad that that it where is money is going coz he'd probably aks my granny about it and she'll not remember even doing it!!
I love my grandparents to bits but I really hate living at home at the minute coz of the stress my Mum is under and the way that everyone treats her. I also think it is putting a strain on my parents relationship, although I don't think they'd admit to it.......
I hope you can understand this message as it is a bit all over the place!! Any advice or words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!!
Thanks
Love
Sonia
xx