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Another heart attack ..........

Scarlett123

Registered User
Apr 30, 2013
3,802
Essex
Another heart attack ..... and another "sexual" problem ..... and more violence

I had a frantic call early yesterday from my daughter, who was visiting her Dad at the Home. He suddenly gripped his arm, they gave him the spray beneath his tongue, he collapsed, and the ambulance arrived in 3 minutes. A neighbour, who was visiting, kindly drove me to the Home, as I was shaking so much.

The ambulance had arrived and they were working on John for ages. After hours at the hospital, umpteen tests etc, I was told he could return to the Home. My nerves just feel completely shredded.

We arrived there, just after the SW, who was having her pre-arranged meeting with us, prior to closing the case. Like so many people with AD, John tends to ramble on about gobbledy-goop , not making any sense at all.

I would have thought the SW had met many people in a similar position, but she kept saying to me, and the Manager "what does he mean?", "why is he talking about pink parachutes?", "where and what's the stone lady-bag, he's talking about?".

What planet do these people live on? Anyway, I reluctantly left John at the Home, worried sick as to what will happen next. Poor man, he was so confused and kept asking me "why am I here, what's happening to me", and clutching my hand.

I asked the SW when I would get anything in writing, and she said she was on holiday next week, and the 2 weeks after, so she'd do everything "sometime after that". I swiftly passed the invoices from the home to her, and I suppose at some time, during the next year or so (!), I'll find out what I have to pay.

Life's not easy, is it. :(
 
Last edited:

Chuggalug

Registered User
Mar 24, 2014
8,007
Norfolk
I had a frantic call early yesterday from my daughter, who was visiting her Dad at the Home. He suddenly gripped his arm, they gave him the spray beneath his tongue, he collapsed, and the ambulance arrived in 3 minutes. A neighbour, who was visiting, kindly drove me to the Home, as I was shaking so much.

The ambulance had arrived and they were working on John for ages. After hours at the hospital, umpteen tests etc, I was told he could return to the Home. My nerves just feel completely shredded.

We arrived there, just after the SW, who was having her pre-arranged meeting with us, prior to closing the case. Like so many people with AD, John tends to ramble on about gobbledy-goop , not making any sense at all.

I would have thought the SW had met many people in a similar position, but she kept saying to me, and the Manager "what does he mean?", "why is he talking about pink parachutes?", "where and what's the stone lady-bag, he's talking about?".

What planet do these people live on? Anyway, I reluctantly left John at the Home, worried sick as to what will happen next. Poor man, he was so confused and kept asking me "why am I here, what's happening to me", and clutching my hand.

I asked the SW when I would get anything in writing, and she said she was on holiday next week, and the 2 weeks after, so she'd do everything "sometime after that". I swiftly passed the invoices from the home to her, and I suppose at some time, during the next year or so (!), I'll find out what I have to pay.

Life's not easy, is it. :(
Oh Scarlett, I AM sorry. As to the Q as to what planet, we still wonder sometimes, don't we :(

Wishing you peace and a safe day for you both.
 

SoyHJ

Registered User
Mar 16, 2013
477
Scarlett, what awful news. Hope John feels more settled very soon and that you do too. Thinking of you. x
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
61,172
68
Dundee
Scarlett I'm so sorry to hear about John. The social worker makes my blood boil. x
 

Jinx

Registered User
Mar 13, 2014
2,333
Pontypool
Oh Scarlett what a dreadful time you're having and your poor husband. I'm so sorry for you and as for clueless SW's, are they not given any training in dementia issues......it beggars belief. Huge hug.


Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
 

Scarlett123

Registered User
Apr 30, 2013
3,802
Essex
I'm so sorry Scarlett. I can imagine your shock.

How are you now? Is your knee better?
Thank you all for your kind messages. My knee is much better than it was, and though I still have the arthritis, the sharp pains have nearly ceased. I need some support if I'm walking upwards, even the gentlest slope, or for any length of time.

I'm not entering for any marathons yet, but next year? - who knows. ;)
 

truth24

Registered User
Oct 13, 2013
5,725
North Somerset
Poor you Scarlett. Hope things improve soon. I don't know why SS take so long with finances. They must know how we spouses worry. I had bill for first 3 weeks from care home, plus a direct debit for monthly charges set up from 1 Aug, together with final bills from Crossroads and day centre last week, and his attendance allowance stops on 11 Aug so think it's bread (can I afford that) plus water for the next few weeks until they get it sorted and tell me how much my monthly contribution (backdated to 7 July) will be!! Hope he feels better soon and sending a big hug to you. Verity

Sent from my GT-N5110
 

Lindy50

Registered User
Dec 11, 2013
5,239
Cotswolds
Scarlett, I am so sorry to hear this news, and hope John is a bit better now.

As to the social worker, was she really a social worker??? If so, her lack of knowledge beggars belief :eek:

All the best to you :)

Lindy xx
 

Scarlett123

Registered User
Apr 30, 2013
3,802
Essex
Scarlett, I am so sorry to hear this news, and hope John is a bit better now.

As to the social worker, was she really a social worker??? If so, her lack of knowledge beggars belief :eek:

All the best to you :)

Lindy xx
Alas, so I've been told, all the SWs in our LA are on temporary contracts. "Fiona" is the sixth one he's had since November.
 

Lindy50

Registered User
Dec 11, 2013
5,239
Cotswolds
Alas, so I've been told, all the SWs in our LA are on temporary contracts. "Fiona" is the sixth one he's had since November.
It's not good enough, is it? :mad: Doesn't allow the SW's to develop expertise, as well as being awful for the clients and Carers :(
 

pamann

Registered User
Oct 28, 2013
2,635
Kent
Thinking of you scarlett hope John will get better soon what a worry for you ♥♥♥

Sent from my GT-P5210 using Talking Point mobile app
 

Scarlett123

Registered User
Apr 30, 2013
3,802
Essex
Poor you Scarlett. Hope things improve soon. I don't know why SS take so long with finances. They must know how we spouses worry. I had bill for first 3 weeks from care home, plus a direct debit for monthly charges set up from 1 Aug, together with final bills from Crossroads and day centre last week, and his attendance allowance stops on 11 Aug so think it's bread (can I afford that) plus water for the next few weeks until they get it sorted and tell me how much my monthly contribution (backdated to 7 July) will be!! Hope he feels better soon and sending a big hug to you. Verity

Sent from my GT-N5110
Oh my goodness, do you have to pay in full from the 1st August, via Direct Debit? Or should this go to your Local Authority? I'm not expecting anything in writing for another month, and until I get it, I'm not cancelling the DLA.

It's a terrible worry, but unlikely to get sorted, because spouses of people needing permanent care doesn't seem to be a big worry to "them" - only us. :( I'm desperately trying not to get too distressed over the finances, because I'm so worried about John's health - and I can only worry about so much at one time.

I'll probably be joining you on the bread and water diet, and becoming a "working girl" ;) to pay back the overpaid DLA, the fees from 2nd July, the extra, because the Home's charges are £100 extra than our LA's limit, the more-extra, yet another £125, so that he doesn't have to share ........................ :eek::eek::eek:

I anticipate a very long and painful meeting with the Finance Officer! :D (smiling in the face of adversity!)
 

WIFE

Registered User
May 23, 2014
856
WEST SUSSEX
Just read your thread Scarlett. Do hope John and you are back on a level again very soon. What a shock all round. The SW - words fail me fortunately for all concerned!

Thinking of you both
 

Noorza

Registered User
Jun 8, 2012
6,542
I had a frantic call early yesterday from my daughter, who was visiting her Dad at the Home. He suddenly gripped his arm, they gave him the spray beneath his tongue, he collapsed, and the ambulance arrived in 3 minutes. A neighbour, who was visiting, kindly drove me to the Home, as I was shaking so much.

The ambulance had arrived and they were working on John for ages. After hours at the hospital, umpteen tests etc, I was told he could return to the Home. My nerves just feel completely shredded.

We arrived there, just after the SW, who was having her pre-arranged meeting with us, prior to closing the case. Like so many people with AD, John tends to ramble on about gobbledy-goop , not making any sense at all.

I would have thought the SW had met many people in a similar position, but she kept saying to me, and the Manager "what does he mean?", "why is he talking about pink parachutes?", "where and what's the stone lady-bag, he's talking about?".

What planet do these people live on? Anyway, I reluctantly left John at the Home, worried sick as to what will happen next. Poor man, he was so confused and kept asking me "why am I here, what's happening to me", and clutching my hand.

I asked the SW when I would get anything in writing, and she said she was on holiday next week, and the 2 weeks after, so she'd do everything "sometime after that". I swiftly passed the invoices from the home to her, and I suppose at some time, during the next year or so (!), I'll find out what I have to pay.

Life's not easy, is it. :(
That is not the care he should be getting. I would be asking for an investigation. They can't tell if a person has had a heart attack until a blood test has been taken and another 12 hours later. I don't know the medical explanations, but mum has had 5 heart attacks, one stroke and many many scares.

Once a heart attack has been diagnosed the cause should be investigated, so for example if it is a blocked artery, then a stent needs to be fitted. That can't be done in hours.

I am really concerned a person who has had a heart attack has been discharged so quickly, someone has failed somewhere IMO. I would suggest contacting PALS at the hospital and ask them to investigate.
 

LYN T

Registered User
Aug 30, 2012
6,960
Brixham Devon
Aw Scarlett you must be exhausted

I hope you managed to sleep a bit last night. As for 'Fiona'-words fail me.

I hope your day is more peaceful today

Love from

Lyn T XXXXX
 

Ann Mac

Registered User
Oct 17, 2013
3,693
Another one wishing you a more peaceful day, Scarlett - thinking of you both xxxx
 

LadyA

Registered User
Oct 19, 2009
13,563
Ireland
Aw Scarlett - hope you have a restful, peaceful day. And may "Fiona" dream about you and John every single night of her holiday!:rolleyes: