Hi everyone, I have previously posted under the name of a_daughter but am having trouble in logging in, so have re-registered.
To recap, my mum went into residential care last October wth vascular dementia described as the moderate stage.
She has never settled at the home. Grizzles a lot, get very anxious and of course has got more and more confused. She sees the local GP for physical ailments and has a CPN and Pysc Consultant for the dementia.
This week has been particularly fraught, as mum believes that someone has taken her children away. We can't make much sense of who it is but it would appear to be my dad, who died 17 years ago. It could be that she is remembering something from 50 years ago, which we don't know about. This has caused her to become very distressed and angry with whoever this person is (although she sometimes calls them a 'she') and is threatening what she will do when they come back! She is constantly trying to get out of the home; banging on doors etc and getting very angry. She has previously struck one member of staff with her walking stick.
I had a call from the manager yesterday to so that she had decided that they could no longer give mum the appropriate care. She said she needed "specialist dementia care". I said that I could not consider moving her at present without knowing what the problem was. When we picked the home, one of the reasons was because the manager (different one) said that she would always be able to live there, even as her dementia progressed and that she would stay in the same room (private) and not be moved to the EMI unit (seems to be all LA funded).
I really do feel that, since my mum has been at the home, the local GP and Psyc service have done very little in helping her. She has had three Consultant Psycs in the last 9 months (new one tomorrow) but they only change her tablets in order to try something else to alleviate the anxiety. Of course, each change needs a couple of months to see if anything helps and so we go on.
She is in constant pain from arthritis in her back and although she has pain killing tablets, still screams in pain and has now begun walking with a sort of crooked stoop. The GP says she just has to try to think of something else! He is of the opinion that there isn't the amount of pain that she is complaining of and it is, in fact, the dementia giving the wrong signals.
Tomorrow we have a meeting with the new Consultant Psychiatrist and I feel I really do need to "kick ass". I have been requesting that mum goes into hospital for an "assessment" (although I don't really know what this entails it seems to be the thing to do to sort out medication) since this all started over a year ago. Each time I have asked this I have been met with such comments as "Oh, I suppose we could section her" (social worker), or "Oh, you don't want her to go into a place like that" (Con. Psyc).
To be honest, I don't have a problem with mum being sectioned. I am quite au fait with the mental health act in that respect, and she wouldn't know if she was in "a place like that" anyway. I took both of them to be meant to be frighteners. You know, like, fancy having your mum sectioned!
Tell me what to do? What can I insist on. I cannot bear to see my mum suffering like this much longer. It's affecting the whole family and we are all falling apart.
Finally, what is "specialist dementia care" and how do we access it.
Thanks
To recap, my mum went into residential care last October wth vascular dementia described as the moderate stage.
She has never settled at the home. Grizzles a lot, get very anxious and of course has got more and more confused. She sees the local GP for physical ailments and has a CPN and Pysc Consultant for the dementia.
This week has been particularly fraught, as mum believes that someone has taken her children away. We can't make much sense of who it is but it would appear to be my dad, who died 17 years ago. It could be that she is remembering something from 50 years ago, which we don't know about. This has caused her to become very distressed and angry with whoever this person is (although she sometimes calls them a 'she') and is threatening what she will do when they come back! She is constantly trying to get out of the home; banging on doors etc and getting very angry. She has previously struck one member of staff with her walking stick.
I had a call from the manager yesterday to so that she had decided that they could no longer give mum the appropriate care. She said she needed "specialist dementia care". I said that I could not consider moving her at present without knowing what the problem was. When we picked the home, one of the reasons was because the manager (different one) said that she would always be able to live there, even as her dementia progressed and that she would stay in the same room (private) and not be moved to the EMI unit (seems to be all LA funded).
I really do feel that, since my mum has been at the home, the local GP and Psyc service have done very little in helping her. She has had three Consultant Psycs in the last 9 months (new one tomorrow) but they only change her tablets in order to try something else to alleviate the anxiety. Of course, each change needs a couple of months to see if anything helps and so we go on.
She is in constant pain from arthritis in her back and although she has pain killing tablets, still screams in pain and has now begun walking with a sort of crooked stoop. The GP says she just has to try to think of something else! He is of the opinion that there isn't the amount of pain that she is complaining of and it is, in fact, the dementia giving the wrong signals.
Tomorrow we have a meeting with the new Consultant Psychiatrist and I feel I really do need to "kick ass". I have been requesting that mum goes into hospital for an "assessment" (although I don't really know what this entails it seems to be the thing to do to sort out medication) since this all started over a year ago. Each time I have asked this I have been met with such comments as "Oh, I suppose we could section her" (social worker), or "Oh, you don't want her to go into a place like that" (Con. Psyc).
To be honest, I don't have a problem with mum being sectioned. I am quite au fait with the mental health act in that respect, and she wouldn't know if she was in "a place like that" anyway. I took both of them to be meant to be frighteners. You know, like, fancy having your mum sectioned!
Tell me what to do? What can I insist on. I cannot bear to see my mum suffering like this much longer. It's affecting the whole family and we are all falling apart.
Finally, what is "specialist dementia care" and how do we access it.
Thanks