A life in the day of.........................

[Nan2seven]

Dear Sylvia, what lovely photos - especially the first one of Dhiren. His smile made ME smile, he looks so very serene.

Perhaps, as you say, the head-rubbing is just a tiredness thing. So sweet that you got your hand rubbed to-day as well.

Love, Nan XXX

 

[Sox]

Dear Sylvia - what lovely photos, especially the first one of Dhiren -what a super smile, he looks so happy - thank you for sharing them. Sox

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you ladies.

 

[Grannie G]

Everyone is suffering the after effects of the 100th Birthday Party.

Staff are still very tired, residents are confused and disorientated, out of kilter, out of routine.
The new lady refuses food and drink, everyone is worried about her.

L is in tears in her room but cannot explain why.
M is in her room away from J.
B is wandering, asking everyone to open the front door for her. She gives it an occasional kick , most annoyed she can`t get out.
J is dreaming, half asleep, half awake, hallucinating, shouting out, puzzled.
D is startled by the shouting, and shouts at J to `shut up`.
Tired carer brings in hoist and wheelchair, asks D to sit forwards so she can put the sling on. D refuses, telling her to `B***** off`.
I am shocked and embarrassed at his language and disrespect. I apologise to carer. D glowers at me.
Second carer manages to persuade D to be hoisted and he is taken to be changed.

When he returns he is given a cup of tea. He holds the spout the wrong way round and spills hot tea down his clothes.
Tired carer still serving tea and biscuits to those in their own room says she will change him as soon as she has finished serving. I tell her not to worry, I will change D.

I get clean vest, shirt and cardigan from his room but he wants his tea. He sees the others eating biscuits and asks where are his. I go into the kitchen to get his special ones. I wait till he has eaten his biscuits and finished his tea.

I ask him to sit forwards so I can remove his clothes. He sits forwards and immediately falls back. I ask again. He sits forwards and I hold him in place with one hand , at the same time trying to remove his cardigan with the other hand. His body is stiff, his arms don`t bend and when they do they are still stiff.

I am out of practice.

Eventually I get his clothes off, and all the time I`m bending over him. It is painful to straighten my back.

Now I have to put the clean ones on.

I nearly strangle him with his vest, the head and first arm go in easily but the second arm is a nuisance. I ask him to sit forwards so I can pull the vest down over his body. It goes half way before he sits back again.

It`ll have to do.

Next the shirt. I have the same problem with the second sleeve. It twists and might well be made of steel. I get it on and then have fiddly little buttons to fasten. I can`t kneel down, my knees hurt too much and anyway I`d have problems getting up again. So once again I bend. When the buttons are fastened I can hardly straighten myself, never mind straighten the shirt or tuck it in.
I say to D `It is very warm in here. Do you need a cardigan on? `Thank goodness he says `No.`

I take his wet clothes down to the laundry. Tired carer laughs when I tell her my tale. At least she has had a laugh today.

 

[BeckyJan]

Oh dear Sylvia. I am so sorry firstly to hear about the after effects of the party and the atmosphere within the Home and then to hear how this is affecting Dhiren.

We forget that carers are especially trained to change clothes and deal with immobile sufferers - well until we try it for ourselves. As you say 'out of practice'. Lets hope today is just one of those rare occasions when things don't go to plan.

I hope tomorrow is a better day for YOU and your next visit is a better one for Dhiren too.

 

[Jo1958]

Sylvia, hi
As BeckyJan says I too hope it's a one off and just the after effects of the party and disruption to normal routine, I'm glad you were able to have a laugh with the tired carer, you are a gem.

Sorry to hear about your back and how much pain you were in with bending, I hope you sleep well and don't have any reactions tomorrow.
Take good care, with kind regards from Jo

 

[Grannie G]

Thanks Ladies.

These carers are worth their weight in gold. It is such hard work for such low pay.

 

[Helen33]

I think professional carers are worth their weight in gold The good ones that is. They do a highly skilled job and a very physically demanding job with very little financial reward. I could just about manage Alan solo 24/7 but the thought of managing this times several other people beggars belief So much is expected of them. They are expected to be perfect 24/7 dealing with very complex issues.

On the whole they manage in Dhiren's care home very well and I think they all deserve a medal.

Love

 

[Butter]

it took three care assistants to change my mother's top the other day. I had brought in new clothes she needed and I hid round the corner as they tried one for size. If she had seen me she would have been even more difficult. The staff were patient and gentle in the face of all my mother said and did. And they have 17 other people to look after.

It took them a good ten minutes, too

 

[Grannie G]

I just buy BIG for Dhiren, Butter. BIG and STRETCHY. I learnt that when he was home with me.
But however big and stretchy, they cannot be too big and he still has a wardrobe full of cotton shirts which may be big but they certainly are not stretchy.
It`s the bending that does it for me.

 

[Contrary Mary]

Oh Sylvia, what memories that has brought back, trying to get Mum changed inbetween carer visits if she had spilt food or drink or anything. I would most definitely agree big clothes are the best. The only things I bought smaller for Mum as she lost weight were trousers. The smaller body was good in some ways for me, she was lighter to help, but, against that, the increasing stiffness was a real problem.

And if she didn't want to help.............

I hope your back is beginning to recover today.

Mary
x

 

[Grannie G]

Dhiren`s word finding difficulties are increasing. He seems unable to finish more sentences than ever.
So we get;
`Where is the ??????`
`What is the????????`
`Have you got a ??????`
`Can you get a ???????`
And I try to guess.
Luckily he doesn`t seem to be upset and when I`m unable to guess correctly, says `Never mind.`

It is seven years since diagnosis and at least thirteen years since onset, so we are fortunate he still has expressive and receptive language and can make some of his needs known.

 

[Izzy]

I'm sorry to hear that Sylvia. I think Bill is at the early stages of this. He is beginning to use totally wrong words or words he has made up. It is sad isn't it. Mind you I do feel extremely lucky. It's almost 12 years now since Bill's diagnosis and he certainly had symptoms before that.

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Izzy.

 

[DeborahBlythe]

Dhiren`s word finding difficulties are increasing. He seems unable to finish more sentences than ever.
So we get;
`Where is the ??????`
`What is the????????`
`Have you got a ??????`
`Can you get a ???????`
And I try to guess.
Luckily he doesn`t seem to be upset and when I`m unable to guess correctly, says `Never mind.`

It is seven years since diagnosis and at least thirteen years since onset, so we are fortunate he still has expressive and receptive language and can make some of his needs known.

Do you know Sylvia I can think of at least two acquaintances who do something very similar. It used to infuriate me because I could never guess what the missing word was and yet the speaker would assume it was obvious. Actually my grandfather had a similar habit and used to call things ' blooming wossnames' so often he seemed to have lost track of all other nouns. It was a sort of family joke at the time but in retrospect, it may well have been a symptom of dementia.

 

[Grannie G]

Thank you Deborah.

There are many of us who aren`t able to recall the odd name. If your grandfather couldn`t recall on a regular basis, who knows?

Dhiren has done well. Many lose all their language much earlier so we can`t complain.

 

[milly123]

Hi Sylvia family are always telling me of for saying you know whatsit hope your back is better and Dhrien keeps talking even if he forgets words best wishes Milly

 

[Grannie G]

Thanks Milly.

 

[Helen33]

It was the first sign of something being wrong with Alan. He kept saying "thingy" or "whatsit". I used to tell him off for being lazy

Maybe Dhiren's fronto temperal lobe is just beginning to malfunction? With Alan it took a long time to progress so hopefully it will with Dhiren too.

Love

 

[Grannie G]

Thanks Helen.

I hadn`t thought of it as specific areas of the brain but you could be right. There is general shrinkage so it`s only logical the frontal lobes will be affected.