A Great Lady has just died
- Thread starter TinaT
- Start date
i'm exhausted after arranging the funeral, the reception, collecting certificates from the doctor to take to the registrar, cleaning out all mum's possessions in the care home and wondering when I can take the bagfulls of lovely clothing to the charity shop. And I still have her house to clean out which will be a marathon of of clothing to sort out, let alone the funiture!
I had a good laugh with mum when looking through her little life policies. Amongst the policies were two notes, written in thick black felt tip:-
Note one said I want The Old Rugged Cross, Abide With Me, How Great Thou Art [/I](Spelled Heart) at my funeral. I want a male vicar (she didn't agree with female vicars no matter how I argued the case) and I want an organist to play the hymns.[/I]
Note two said I'I do not want ANY FLOWERS (underlined twice for more emphasis) at my funeral, not even on my coffin'. I want the money to go to the RSPCA
Well I just couldn't bear the thought of a bare coffin so I decided to go to the florist and ask for a wreath to cover the coffin with greenery - no flowers please note- with predominantly Ivy as the main greenery (as this was her name) and some white and green berries for a touch of colour. How she would shout at me but I've honored her wishes with NO FLOWERS.
xxTinaT
ps I didn't empty the drawers at the nursing home - must phone them up as soon as I've posted this
I had a good laugh with mum when looking through her little life policies. Amongst the policies were two notes, written in thick black felt tip:-
Note one said I want The Old Rugged Cross, Abide With Me, How Great Thou Art [/I](Spelled Heart) at my funeral. I want a male vicar (she didn't agree with female vicars no matter how I argued the case) and I want an organist to play the hymns.[/I]
Note two said I'I do not want ANY FLOWERS (underlined twice for more emphasis) at my funeral, not even on my coffin'. I want the money to go to the RSPCA
Well I just couldn't bear the thought of a bare coffin so I decided to go to the florist and ask for a wreath to cover the coffin with greenery - no flowers please note- with predominantly Ivy as the main greenery (as this was her name) and some white and green berries for a touch of colour. How she would shout at me but I've honored her wishes with NO FLOWERS.
xxTinaT
ps I didn't empty the drawers at the nursing home - must phone them up as soon as I've posted this
Last edited:
Dear Tina,
I have just read this, catching up. What thoughtful and personal input from your Mum at her own funeral - hurrah for her. And the greenery sounds just the ticket, and RSPCA will still benefit! I loved what your brother posted, and didn't your Mum time it perfectly, past Maggie out and got to outlast her. Sounds like your Mum was a splendid woman, and it is lovely to hear that you and your brother are preparing a send off that she would approve of. It is clear that she was much loved and treasured, and I send my deepest sympathy at the loss of a splendid mother and woman.
Look after yourself, thinking of you, BE
I have just read this, catching up. What thoughtful and personal input from your Mum at her own funeral - hurrah for her. And the greenery sounds just the ticket, and RSPCA will still benefit! I loved what your brother posted, and didn't your Mum time it perfectly, past Maggie out and got to outlast her. Sounds like your Mum was a splendid woman, and it is lovely to hear that you and your brother are preparing a send off that she would approve of. It is clear that she was much loved and treasured, and I send my deepest sympathy at the loss of a splendid mother and woman.
Look after yourself, thinking of you, BE
Such sad news. My thoughts are with you.
What an inspiring opening to a thread! I have the greatest respect for the way in which you, and your son, have reacted to such sad news.
What an inspiring opening to a thread! I have the greatest respect for the way in which you, and your son, have reacted to such sad news.
I'm still smiling at the two notes I found but also after the past ten years of constant caring, hoping that I have built up enough life outside the caring role to fill my days. I hope so as this side of my life has taken almost all my time an d energies.
xxTinaT
xxTinaT
Well Tina, we are all still here as you adjust to your new life. Just like when we are caring, one day at a time. It is early days yet, and I have every confidence that you will pick up the threads......
So keep posting and we all still need advice and value you. Love BE
So keep posting and we all still need advice and value you. Love BE
Hello Tina
I would endorse all that other members have said about your wonderful mother
I am particularly affected by her choice of hymns
"Note one said I want The Old Rugged Cross, Abide With Me, How Great Thou Art [(Spelled Heart)
Abide With Me, How Great Thou Art [(Spelled Heart) would be my own choice
and The Old Rugged Cross was a lifelong favourite of my mothers
( sung at her funeral )
She would have been 103 this year and all of my life I can recall her singing that song , so many times with tears in her eyes , something I shall never forget
As the saying goes, your Mom must have been a 'Great Old Gal’
( and I loved her spelling of heart ,I think she was probably right .)
You , your family , and your mother will all be in our thoughts
Take heart
jimbo 111
I would endorse all that other members have said about your wonderful mother
I am particularly affected by her choice of hymns
"Note one said I want The Old Rugged Cross, Abide With Me, How Great Thou Art [(Spelled Heart)
Abide With Me, How Great Thou Art [(Spelled Heart) would be my own choice
and The Old Rugged Cross was a lifelong favourite of my mothers
( sung at her funeral )
She would have been 103 this year and all of my life I can recall her singing that song , so many times with tears in her eyes , something I shall never forget
As the saying goes, your Mom must have been a 'Great Old Gal’
( and I loved her spelling of heart ,I think she was probably right .)
You , your family , and your mother will all be in our thoughts
Take heart
jimbo 111
Tina, I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. Please accept my condolences.
Your mum's notes did make me smile though. My mum too has always said she doesn't want any flowers at her funeral as 'flowers are for the living'. You have given me an idea
.
Your mum's notes did make me smile though. My mum too has always said she doesn't want any flowers at her funeral as 'flowers are for the living'. You have given me an idea
.
Tina, I love the notes. Your mother certainly sounds determined to have it her way, come hell or high water. Just like my mother.
my condolences to you. I am glad you got comfort from finding the notes from your mum - my mum has left a similar note with songs for her funeral.
I talked to my hubby about what I wanted and he told me that unless my wishes are recorded in a will, he'll make sure they play something like The Birdie Song....
I talked to my hubby about what I wanted and he told me that unless my wishes are recorded in a will, he'll make sure they play something like The Birdie Song....
Betty is my mother's best friend. They've been inseperable for many years and Betty will take the passing of my mother very hard I'm sure. But even in the midst of her sorrow Betty likes a 'bit of fun'. She told me today that she has asked her daughters that the last song at her own funeral be 'Baby come and light my fire'. Tasteless and shocking but black humour such as this saw both these strong ladies through a world war and many years of widowhood. Betty has recently read the Shades of Grey book and its sequal - and says she enjoyed them! She's 88 by the way.
xxTinaT
xxTinaT
I have tears on one side with the wonderfull choice of hymns your mum has, whilst on the other side I have tears of laughter about her wonderfull friend Betty and her choice of literature ! The spelling of heart is simply CLASSIC !
Both Betty and mum sound amazing people.....characters I think is the word I am looking for.
I have such a vivid imagination from what you have written and I so wish I could join you for a "girlie hug" with yourself and Betty.
I am so pleased that you are there for Betty and Betty is there for you.
Sincere regards to you and BETTY x x x x x
Both Betty and mum sound amazing people.....characters I think is the word I am looking for.
I have such a vivid imagination from what you have written and I so wish I could join you for a "girlie hug" with yourself and Betty.
I am so pleased that you are there for Betty and Betty is there for you.
Sincere regards to you and BETTY x x x x x
