2 parents with dementia

[Kenw]

My in-laws, Dad 86yrs, Mom 81 both have dementia. We moved them from a wonderful senior minimal care facility, after experiencing the digression in both in-laws. My wonderful wife, who is the the most loving and compassionate person I know and love, has been the ultimate champion, caring for them while we run our business.
We are both in our sixties and lived in a high rise and moved us all into a 4000 sgf home in a suburb, to try and care for them. We have medical care professionals come in multiple days a week, which along with daily help from a helper assisting us with them most of the day. I help almost as much as the care givers.

They are not destitute by no means, but with both having similar issue along with dementia, their resources are challenged.

They both have multiple health issues that have added complications.
We have maintained this living arrangement for over a year and a half now, but we are at wits end.
Both of them today and for the last 2 weeks have, both been at a rehabilitation center due to separate medical issues.
The speed of the changes in their condition has really taken a toll.
We are now trying to address determining a different situation, extremely expensive.
We just don’t know what to do. Maybe just continue as we have been doing.

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome @Kenw

It sounds as if you are in the USA rather than the UK.

I hope whatever support you get here is helpful in managing the challenges of dementia. There is much information which can help no matter where you are in the world.

Have you made contact with dementia support in the USA? This might give you the advice and support you need.

Dementia Society of America®

We are your leading volunteer, all-Dementias nonprofit in America. Find local resources, donate to help others, learn about Dementia, and more. Lewy Body, Alzheimer's, MCI, Vascular Dementia, Frontotemporal.

www.dementiasociety.org

Home | Alzheimer's Association

Alzheimer's Association national site – information on Alzheimer's disease and dementia symptoms, diagnosis, stages, treatment, care and support resources.

www.alz.org

 

[canary]

Hello @Kenw

Im sorry you find yourself in this situation. Whenever people post on here saying they are going to move to have their parent(s) moving in with them, the advice is always not to do it for the very reasons you have discovered - it is not sustainable in the long term as their needs increase and you can end up "stuck" in the situation.

Im afraid I dont know how care provision and access works where you are - it will be very different from UK, but I would suggest that you do everything you can to solve it. Your parents will probably not like it and you will probably have to resort to being "economical with the truth" with them to make it happen, but there comes a time when their needs (and yours) outweigh their desires