Morning all,
To be honest guys, after the discusions we have had with the home, I thought that it was clearly recorded in Mils care plan that unless hospital admission was essential to prevent or treat a condition causing her pain and discomfort, it wasn't to happen. OH spoke to the agency nurse who rang here, and she went on about chest pains and the paramedics recommending that Mil be admitted, and OH said he felt that because Mil was apparently in pain and it was being advised, he had no choice but to agree. Talking to the paramedics in the ambulance (who had taken over from the paramedics that had brought her in, because they had finished their shift and left), they seemed to be under the impression that OH had
requested she be taken to hospital. I think the agency nurse had panicked, and probably didn't have a clue what was in the care plan! I was there when OH was talking to her, and I heard him clearly ask was she sure it was necessary for Mil to be taken to hospital? And he said - again very clearly - "OK, if you think it's absolutely necessary". So it certainly was not a case of him requesting she be taken.
I need to clarify this with the home, when I next go there - I haven't been to see her since the night at the hospital because by Friday of that week, I had what seemed to be cold, but its turned out to be a chest infection, and I haven't dared go near her. OH says that none of the familiar nurses have been around on the two occasions he has visited, so he hasn't been able to get to the bottom of it either. To make it harder at the moment, the lovely manager, S, has stepped down from the managers position, and has gone back to being a nurse apparently - and she is currently on leave anyway! Things seem to be rather up in the air at the home at the moment
As I said, OH has visited twice since her trip to the hospital - and she is as fine as she can be, given her condition (IYKWIM!) . Whether its down to the stress of the night in hospital, or what, we don't know, but OH has said she has been really aggressive with him on both the occasions he has been. On the first visit, pinching and punching him - and finding it very funny. On the second visit she was even worse, and he said that in the end, after less than 5 minutes, he was forced to move his seat away from her because she was so determined to hurt him. She was furious that he wouldn't sit near enough for her to reach him and threatened to pour her cup of tea on the floor. OH went to take the cup away, and she threw it at him, at which point he decided to leave as him being there was obviously winding her up, though he didn't know why and Mil either couldn't or wouldn't explain.
We both feel that she is just very - well - the only word we can come up with is 'manic' at the moment. I noticed it in the two weeks or so before the hospital visit. Everything is exaggerated with her, it's really strange. Joke with her, and she rolls her eyes, pulls a daft face and very loudly shouts 'Oooooooooooh'. She laughs in a very odd way, its not exaggerating to call it a very theatrical 'cackle', tbh, nothing like her 'normal' laugh. And when she is like that, if there are others near by, she looks to them as if to see if they are amused or maybe just paying attention to her? She has periods of OTT affection, where she grabs your hand or arm and plasters it in loud kisses, repeatedly saying 'I love you', over and over, and if you are daft enough to agree to 'give her a kiss', she does her best to try and kiss you full on the mouth, with a grip like grim death - its uncomfortable and feels decidely strange, I know that OH and I both try and avoid getting that close. She shouts a lot, and the sudden physical attacks are (we think) getting worse. And her fury and lack of understanding when we won't allow her to hurt us is extreme. And you get the impression that its all almost a performance, very attention seeking - though I would also have to say that nowadays she lacks the capacity to be able to be so calculated, despite how it all might appear. Several times we have found that she has been moved to her room or the sensory room, because staff have said she has been so loud that its impacting on other residents. Not explaining it very clearly, its just so very odd - even for Mil!
For the first time since I started this job, I've had to cancel my projects this week, because of the chest infection. No way could I go in and work with the young people in the state I've been in! I've used the time to play catch up with the admin, though again, additional demands from senior managers have eaten up so much time that I haven't caught up as much as I might have done otherwise. And cancelling the time with the young people has generated so many emails, queries and organisation, that its actually made more work! I have to go in on Friday, the last day of a project , that can't be re-arranged unfortunately. Today is the first day I've felt a bit better, so hopefully, I'll manage Friday with no problems. Son and his GF are visiting this weekend, with Jess and Oscar my granddogs. Oz is apparently improving, but still with a tendency to destroy anything within his reach, so I am going to have to Oscar-proof the house before he arrives. When we are still in a state of upheaval, due to the dining room makeover, that is not going to be easy! Be worth it to see them all though
I hope you are all OK, and as always, I'm sending much love to you all xxxxx
