Dave's ability to find the right words was one of the first things to be apparant. Yet his ability to remember his PIN and other numerical details was fine. Cons. Psychiatrist said it was the part of the brain affected.
A life in the day of.........................
- Thread starter Grannie G
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Dhiren did too Sarah and always gave a note even though he had lots of coins. I`m sorry it`s come to this for you Sarah. You try so hard. xx
Whenever I visit Dhiren his face lights up with a wonderful smile as soon as we make eye contact and he pats the space by his side, which is usually a chair, and says `Sit here. Sit here.`
The same happened when I visited yesterday.
After I`d been with him for a while, I noticed a lady peeping round the door as if not sure whether she should come into the sitting room or not.
She was similar build to me, wore glasses, which I used to wear before cataract surgery, and had pure white hair. She came into the room carrying a few CDs and a banana. She walked towards Dhiren and leaned down to him.
He gave her a beaming smile, patted the space besides him [which happened to be a chair side table] and said `Sit here. Sit here.`
It made me wonder if he is still really seeing and greeting me.
It did not upset me. My priority is still for contentment for Dhiren, but I found it really interesting.
I encouraged the new resident to sit on the other side of me, she told me her name, I told her Dhiren was my husband, she was interested for a while and then dozed off.
I will be watchful from now on and see how this develops. A new stage perhaps, or one which I have only just recognised.
The same happened when I visited yesterday.
After I`d been with him for a while, I noticed a lady peeping round the door as if not sure whether she should come into the sitting room or not.
She was similar build to me, wore glasses, which I used to wear before cataract surgery, and had pure white hair. She came into the room carrying a few CDs and a banana. She walked towards Dhiren and leaned down to him.
He gave her a beaming smile, patted the space besides him [which happened to be a chair side table] and said `Sit here. Sit here.`
It made me wonder if he is still really seeing and greeting me.
It did not upset me. My priority is still for contentment for Dhiren, but I found it really interesting.
I encouraged the new resident to sit on the other side of me, she told me her name, I told her Dhiren was my husband, she was interested for a while and then dozed off.
I will be watchful from now on and see how this develops. A new stage perhaps, or one which I have only just recognised.
I like the thought that your husband may have a new friend to sit on his other side. My father is making new friends in the outside world and I wish my mother was making new friends in the inside world but when I mentioned friends today she talked of people she knew in the late 1940s, early 50s.
In addition to my buildings and contents insurance I took out additional insurance , with another company, especially to cover water supply pipes and internal plumbing and drainage.
In the correspondence for this year`s renewal they told me how I , as ` a valued customer` would benefit from even greater cover.
Yesterday I had cause to put them to the test.
I have a small occasional leak in the kitchen, which seemed to come from the kitchen central heating radiator.
I phoned for service, paid the £50 excess , which had to be paid before anyone would be sent out, and waited for the contractor, who came within a couple of hours.
He found the leak was coming from the bath drainpipe [the bathroom adjoins the kitchen] and the side panel of the bath would need removing in order to gain access.
He then calmly told me he did not carry enough sealant to replace the side panel properly and I would need to call another contractor out to seal the panel.
I questioned this by phoning the company, only to be told I was not covered for
`consequential damage`.
After a very heated exchange , I questioned the point of insurance which necessitated in calling a second contractor to complete the job, and mindful of having no reassurance my bathroom would be left in a good state of repair, I refused to accept what was offered and asked the contractor to leave.
I was left shaking , upset and feeling very vulnerable.
And I missed Dhiren so much.
I wouldn`t mind but I was the one who sorted problems. Dhiren was there to share the responsibility. I was the one who dealt with correspondence and phone calls. He was always by my side.
I am absolutely fine [well most of the time] while there are no complications to deal with. As soon as something threatens my security, something which should function well doesn`t , whether it be big or small, it has a much bigger effect than it ever did before dementia.
The representative from the insurance company suggested I read the policy carefully, at the same time admitting the document was difficult to understand.
Now I have a battle on my hands but have nothing left to fight with.
In the correspondence for this year`s renewal they told me how I , as ` a valued customer` would benefit from even greater cover.
Yesterday I had cause to put them to the test.
I have a small occasional leak in the kitchen, which seemed to come from the kitchen central heating radiator.
I phoned for service, paid the £50 excess , which had to be paid before anyone would be sent out, and waited for the contractor, who came within a couple of hours.
He found the leak was coming from the bath drainpipe [the bathroom adjoins the kitchen] and the side panel of the bath would need removing in order to gain access.
He then calmly told me he did not carry enough sealant to replace the side panel properly and I would need to call another contractor out to seal the panel.
I questioned this by phoning the company, only to be told I was not covered for
`consequential damage`.
After a very heated exchange , I questioned the point of insurance which necessitated in calling a second contractor to complete the job, and mindful of having no reassurance my bathroom would be left in a good state of repair, I refused to accept what was offered and asked the contractor to leave.
I was left shaking , upset and feeling very vulnerable.
And I missed Dhiren so much.
I wouldn`t mind but I was the one who sorted problems. Dhiren was there to share the responsibility. I was the one who dealt with correspondence and phone calls. He was always by my side.
I am absolutely fine [well most of the time] while there are no complications to deal with. As soon as something threatens my security, something which should function well doesn`t , whether it be big or small, it has a much bigger effect than it ever did before dementia.
The representative from the insurance company suggested I read the policy carefully, at the same time admitting the document was difficult to understand.
Now I have a battle on my hands but have nothing left to fight with.
I am sorry to hear you are having problems and hope that you get the strength from somewhere to get it sorted .I sometimes think you need a degree just to get in touch with social services,or phone BT to sort broadband out these days, everything is so difficult and never how it seems, it takes so much effort and,I am often in tears when I come off the phone .
You can do it !!!
Jeany x
You can do it !!!
Jeany x
Oh Sylvia - I'm so sorry to read this. I so know what you mean. I have always dealt with the finances and correspondence etc but Bill was always there to discuss it with. He's still here, of course, but he can't give an opinion or advice on anything.
Insurance often seems such a waste of money.I hope you get it sorted out.
Insurance often seems such a waste of money.I hope you get it sorted out.
I am massively sympathetic. My solution is always to declare that I intend to live in a tent from now on. But then there is the small matter of putting up the tent ....
Seriously, though, your confidence will come back. Two years is not actually very long and all the adapting you are having to do all the time will sap your confidence. Two steps forward. One step back.
Seriously, though, your confidence will come back. Two years is not actually very long and all the adapting you are having to do all the time will sap your confidence. Two steps forward. One step back.
Thank you ladies.
I know the saga isn`t really dementia related but it`s the knock on effect which we don`t always expect. It`s also a lesson to be learned.
Tomorrow I will phone my Buildings and Contents Insurance Company and, if necessary, make an appointment with the CAB.
I know the saga isn`t really dementia related but it`s the knock on effect which we don`t always expect. It`s also a lesson to be learned.
Tomorrow I will phone my Buildings and Contents Insurance Company and, if necessary, make an appointment with the CAB.
As Izzy says, although you have always sorted these things out, you had Dhiren there to sound off at, and to agree with you. Somebody telling you're in the right gives you the confidence to stand your ground.
I'm not surprised that you're frustrated at the Insurance company who were happy to take your premiums, but are now trying to wriggle out of their responsibilities. I hope you get it sorted.
I'm not surprised that you're frustrated at the Insurance company who were happy to take your premiums, but are now trying to wriggle out of their responsibilities. I hope you get it sorted.
I am sorry to hear about your leak and the insurance company Sylvia. All plumbing problems are a cast iron pain in the proverbial.
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