Sorry everyone, I just need to blow off some steam. I really really really want to quit.
Just how creative can a person with dementia be?
Accusation of all kinds coming right out from her imagination with no reason makes carers' life a living hell. The worst thing is she genuinely believes her imagination is true, and acts accordingly.
My Grandma had a tantrum first thing in the morning. She made huge noise to wake everyone and accused the helper not treating her right because she is old and alone, no one cares about her (beside she is old, none of that is true). She won't hear any reasoning (yes, I know I shouldn't even try reasoning/explaining. I should just go along with whatever she says. Even when she was implying I taught the helper how NOT to respect her and made every little thing in her life horrible.), just keep on saying how weak and old and poor she was, and how badly she was treated SINCE the helper came back from the supermarket WITH ME yesterday (which I didn't leave the house at all). If you listen carefully, she was not accusing of anything in particular, just how she felt she was not respected since yesterday.
While I was preparing to go to work, she started her accusations implying I was the bad guy behind all her recent suffering. I was in a hurry, so I didn't stay for the entire episode. And I heard enough to know she was beyond reason, there can be nothing good coming out from her month. I also saw that she believed in what she was saying wholeheartedly, to the point her hands were trembling with rage. Since mum was the listener, I told her what actually happened yesterday. Mum guessed Grandma was not happy/angry mostly because the fact that "Daughter (my mum) went home for the day.", instead of "Grand-daughter asks helper to do things without asking for her permission." (act of disrespectful in her understanding). I don't know if that is true, and I don't care now. Cause I believe it is best if we don't see each other for a good period of time.
I don't know how others can deal with all those without letting them get to you. I have read so much about this disease, but I don't think all those readings help prepare me for this.
Just how creative can a person with dementia be?
Accusation of all kinds coming right out from her imagination with no reason makes carers' life a living hell. The worst thing is she genuinely believes her imagination is true, and acts accordingly.
My Grandma had a tantrum first thing in the morning. She made huge noise to wake everyone and accused the helper not treating her right because she is old and alone, no one cares about her (beside she is old, none of that is true). She won't hear any reasoning (yes, I know I shouldn't even try reasoning/explaining. I should just go along with whatever she says. Even when she was implying I taught the helper how NOT to respect her and made every little thing in her life horrible.), just keep on saying how weak and old and poor she was, and how badly she was treated SINCE the helper came back from the supermarket WITH ME yesterday (which I didn't leave the house at all). If you listen carefully, she was not accusing of anything in particular, just how she felt she was not respected since yesterday.
While I was preparing to go to work, she started her accusations implying I was the bad guy behind all her recent suffering. I was in a hurry, so I didn't stay for the entire episode. And I heard enough to know she was beyond reason, there can be nothing good coming out from her month. I also saw that she believed in what she was saying wholeheartedly, to the point her hands were trembling with rage. Since mum was the listener, I told her what actually happened yesterday. Mum guessed Grandma was not happy/angry mostly because the fact that "Daughter (my mum) went home for the day.", instead of "Grand-daughter asks helper to do things without asking for her permission." (act of disrespectful in her understanding). I don't know if that is true, and I don't care now. Cause I believe it is best if we don't see each other for a good period of time.
I don't know how others can deal with all those without letting them get to you. I have read so much about this disease, but I don't think all those readings help prepare me for this.
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