Hi, my mum was diagnosed with dementia last year, but it seems she has gone downhill really fast. She lives in Kent and I am in London and travelling down to her 3 to 4 times a week is so difficult. Wondering if there was anyway to get her moved near me. Social Services in her area say that I have to pay for any help, I really don't know what to do, as mum has no savings.
My mum had Dementia
- Thread starter Mazz557
- Start date
Hello @Mazz557 welcome to the Dementia Support Forum, there is friendly support here and a lot of shared experience. Has your mum received a care needs assessment from the local authority? This should usually take place before any financial assessment so it's not clear why you have been told that you have to pay for any help? A little more information would be helpful in terms of offering advice about moving your mum, such as does she own her own property or is she renting?
If your mum hasn't yet had a care needs assessment then it's a good idea to request this, details in the link below. You will need to be specific about the level of care that your mum needs, and unfortunately as funding is an issue everywhere, the harsh reality is that if the local authority know that you are visiting 3-4 times weekly to provide care then they will leave you to it. It may be an idea to step back a bit, particularly as the travelling is getting so hard for you. It's a difficult thing to do but you need to look after your own health and wellbeing too, and whilst you are looking after your mum social services will consider that she doesn't need their help.
www.alzheimers.org.uk
If your mum hasn't yet had a care needs assessment then it's a good idea to request this, details in the link below. You will need to be specific about the level of care that your mum needs, and unfortunately as funding is an issue everywhere, the harsh reality is that if the local authority know that you are visiting 3-4 times weekly to provide care then they will leave you to it. It may be an idea to step back a bit, particularly as the travelling is getting so hard for you. It's a difficult thing to do but you need to look after your own health and wellbeing too, and whilst you are looking after your mum social services will consider that she doesn't need their help.
The care needs assessment: support for people with dementia
This page looks at how a person with dementia can get a care assessment, who does an assessment, how they are carried out, who makes the decision, and tips for making the most of the care needs assessment. It also explains the eligibility criteria.
www.alzheimers.org.uk
Thank you so much for the reply, mum doesn't have her own property and is renting from my brother, but he no longer wants her there in his property sad to say. The property is purchased by my brother.
I have been told since December that mum will have the care assessment but nothing has happened.
I have just started the application for Attendance Allowance for mum as well. How would i relay to the services that I am taking a step back from her care?
I have been told since December that mum will have the care assessment but nothing has happened.
I have just started the application for Attendance Allowance for mum as well. How would i relay to the services that I am taking a step back from her care?
Do social services already know that you are doing a lot of caring for your mum - usually that's the sort of thing that is asked during the care needs assessment. What level of care does your mum need at the moment, what things are you helping with during your visits? Is she currently vulnerable and at risk of harm without someone to help her with things like washing, cooking/eating/drinking, being appropriately clothed, preventing her from going out on her own and getting lost etc? If so, you should let social services know that your mum is vulnerable and at risk, and this might mean that the care needs assessment is prioritised as more urgent.
I think the other pressing issue at the moment is that your brother wants your mum out of the house and she will be homeless and reliant on social services to find her somewhere else to live. Has your brother given a date for when he wants her to leave? Are social services aware of your mum's housing situation? Depending on which area of Kent your mum lives in and which area of London you want to move her too then that may well result in being a more expensive option for the local authority so they will probably want to keep her within the same local authority area.
There's a lot going on here so I think it might be helpful for you to discuss the situation with the Dementia Support Line as they are very knowledgeable and helpful and will hopefully be able to provide you with a way forward:
Dementia Support Line
If you need dementia support, we’re here for you. Get personalised information, support and advice by calling us on 0333 150 3456.
www.alzheimers.org.uk
Would also like to know, another family member lives in a council property in the same town as mum but they don't have enough room in their property to take her in.
Is there anything they can do to get a bigger property to accommodate for mum, currently if mum goes there she will have to sleep in the livingroom and the bathroom is on the 2nd floor.
Is there anything they can do to get a bigger property to accommodate for mum, currently if mum goes there she will have to sleep in the livingroom and the bathroom is on the 2nd floor.
