1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

Young dementia sufferers who are sexually active

Discussion in 'Younger people with dementia and their carers' started by kingybell, Jul 26, 2015.

  1. kingybell

    kingybell Registered User

    Feb 3, 2015
    115
    Had a bit of a dilemma today. The Mil who is still a woman with sexual needs put us in a very awkward position.

    She had phoned minor injuries with problems bleeding and sore down below. She went to minor injuries where she was treated with much contempt by the staff (who were initially not aware of her illness).
    We found out she had been using 'toys' to 'pleasure herself' and had forgotten all about it (I found them hidden under a pillow).

    She was distressed by the soreness and saying she didn't know why.
    I am so concerned that this is not an isolated incident and also she keeps 'trying it on' with any man she sees.

    I'm so tired of this behaviour and when I confront her I get either a childish or teenage response. I can't keep an eye on her 24/7 and she refuses anyone coming to help her.
    She's also not taking medication. I'm scared for her sanity and well being as there is a childhood history of sexual abuse. I could cry as both sons want to wash their hands of her.
     
  2. sistermillicent

    sistermillicent Registered User

    Jan 30, 2009
    2,951
    I would be inclined to get in touch with the local sexual health clinic and see whether in future MIL might get a more sympathetic and less judgemental response from them.
    I would make sure there are a couple of tubes of KY jelly on the bedside table, you never know, that might make a difference.
    I hope someone has a better idea than these, but I think it is something she is going to do for a while and eventually it will pass. Maybe you could find a way of being reassuring to her if she complains again of soreness, nice warm bath and some cream? seek advice from sexual health clinic.
     
  3. kingybell

    kingybell Registered User

    Feb 3, 2015
    115
    It's so distressing and yet another thing to worry about. My husband has said he will not be having anything to do with her moving forward.
    I'm at my whits end yet again
     
  4. 2jays

    2jays Registered User

    Jun 4, 2010
    11,481
    West Midlands
    Not meaning to be flippant here but have you thought of going to that well known store Ann S****** and getting something a bit more appropriate than what she is using

    Though it doesn't feel like it, this type of behaviour will pass

    You have my sympathy that you feel your OH is not going to be supportive - no words of wisdom just understand how you feel xxx


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     

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