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Young dementia sufferers who are sexually active


Registered User
Feb 3, 2015
Had a bit of a dilemma today. The Mil who is still a woman with sexual needs put us in a very awkward position.

She had phoned minor injuries with problems bleeding and sore down below. She went to minor injuries where she was treated with much contempt by the staff (who were initially not aware of her illness).
We found out she had been using 'toys' to 'pleasure herself' and had forgotten all about it (I found them hidden under a pillow).

She was distressed by the soreness and saying she didn't know why.
I am so concerned that this is not an isolated incident and also she keeps 'trying it on' with any man she sees.

I'm so tired of this behaviour and when I confront her I get either a childish or teenage response. I can't keep an eye on her 24/7 and she refuses anyone coming to help her.
She's also not taking medication. I'm scared for her sanity and well being as there is a childhood history of sexual abuse. I could cry as both sons want to wash their hands of her.


Registered User
Jan 30, 2009
I would be inclined to get in touch with the local sexual health clinic and see whether in future MIL might get a more sympathetic and less judgemental response from them.
I would make sure there are a couple of tubes of KY jelly on the bedside table, you never know, that might make a difference.
I hope someone has a better idea than these, but I think it is something she is going to do for a while and eventually it will pass. Maybe you could find a way of being reassuring to her if she complains again of soreness, nice warm bath and some cream? seek advice from sexual health clinic.


Registered User
Feb 3, 2015
It's so distressing and yet another thing to worry about. My husband has said he will not be having anything to do with her moving forward.
I'm at my whits end yet again


Registered User
Jun 4, 2010
West Midlands
Not meaning to be flippant here but have you thought of going to that well known store Ann S****** and getting something a bit more appropriate than what she is using

Though it doesn't feel like it, this type of behaviour will pass

You have my sympathy that you feel your OH is not going to be supportive - no words of wisdom just understand how you feel xxx

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