Hi
I have posted before with regard to my husband who has just come out of hospital having had his kidney function dropping to 9% - seems to have stabalised although they seem not to be sure what caused it.
However, I am now very worried about my father who is 79. He has been diagnosed with heart problems and for several weeks, had to have regular visits to get the Warafin dose stabalised. Thankfully his friend took him. He really seems to have gone downhill and is very confused. I had to make it clear I was very limited as to what help I could offer as I am a full time carer to my husband, but I did offer to help him find a cleaner and someone who could take him shopping - my neighbour runs a small care agency and my friend does cleaning/shopping for a few older people and both are reliable women whom I trust. I also suggested several times getting Age UK round to see if we could get him Attendance Allowance. He seems mega depressed and confused - won't go out or even worse, let his friends visit . He asked me how old I was yesterday and keeps telling me the same thing - that he does not have sugar diabetas but I never thought he did. He also said his cupboard was bare so I dashed round with emergency supplies such as soup and pasta pot and milk only to told his friend is taking him shopping the next day. His friend has now said that she will take him to the GP for the blood test, but will not take him shopping as she is busy next week. I have suggested a caring local taxi driver.
He has told his GP he is depressed but will not take anti depressants and had for a while stopped taking his thyroid pills.
I think frankly he wants someone to go over and give him his pills but I am just not able to do this.
He is in sheltered accomadation and tells me he has told the Housing Officer of his problems and she has put it in the hands of Social Services. Yet he has no name or date! I am thinking maybe my best option is to write to his GP expressing my concerns, and asking if he could maybe expedite the social services involvement?
Also he is very strange with his money - he has always been mega careful even mean.He offered me money for a cat run which he has been keeping under his bed from his pension, having had his housing benefit stopped of having too much money in the bank! The next day he phoned and said he could not find the money. This really worries me especially if he has strangers in the house and a lot of money under the bed.
Right now, I am hanging on with my fingernails trying to cope with my husband. I just cannot deal with my father right now as well.
Sorry for the rant but just do not know what to do for the best...a mutual friend offered to go round with a fish and chip supper for his birthday, and I was hoping to maybe see how she found him, but he has said he does not want her to come. It is as if he has given up on life....yet he has no pain and is no longer breathless. Could this be dementia brought on by the stress of the heart problems? Yet the Consultant was happy with the reading and does not want to see him until next December.
He has also said he is going to disinherit me! I am fine about this but when I say he needs to change his will, he says he is not going to pay money to a solicitor.
Right now I would be happy if I never had to cast eyes on my husband or father again. Sick of trying to help two nasty selfish old men. They do not talk to one another after a falling out 3 years ago and this has caused me huge stress.
Sorry for the rant ...will ring Carers later today and see what they think.
I have posted before with regard to my husband who has just come out of hospital having had his kidney function dropping to 9% - seems to have stabalised although they seem not to be sure what caused it.
However, I am now very worried about my father who is 79. He has been diagnosed with heart problems and for several weeks, had to have regular visits to get the Warafin dose stabalised. Thankfully his friend took him. He really seems to have gone downhill and is very confused. I had to make it clear I was very limited as to what help I could offer as I am a full time carer to my husband, but I did offer to help him find a cleaner and someone who could take him shopping - my neighbour runs a small care agency and my friend does cleaning/shopping for a few older people and both are reliable women whom I trust. I also suggested several times getting Age UK round to see if we could get him Attendance Allowance. He seems mega depressed and confused - won't go out or even worse, let his friends visit . He asked me how old I was yesterday and keeps telling me the same thing - that he does not have sugar diabetas but I never thought he did. He also said his cupboard was bare so I dashed round with emergency supplies such as soup and pasta pot and milk only to told his friend is taking him shopping the next day. His friend has now said that she will take him to the GP for the blood test, but will not take him shopping as she is busy next week. I have suggested a caring local taxi driver.
He has told his GP he is depressed but will not take anti depressants and had for a while stopped taking his thyroid pills.
I think frankly he wants someone to go over and give him his pills but I am just not able to do this.
He is in sheltered accomadation and tells me he has told the Housing Officer of his problems and she has put it in the hands of Social Services. Yet he has no name or date! I am thinking maybe my best option is to write to his GP expressing my concerns, and asking if he could maybe expedite the social services involvement?
Also he is very strange with his money - he has always been mega careful even mean.He offered me money for a cat run which he has been keeping under his bed from his pension, having had his housing benefit stopped of having too much money in the bank! The next day he phoned and said he could not find the money. This really worries me especially if he has strangers in the house and a lot of money under the bed.
Right now, I am hanging on with my fingernails trying to cope with my husband. I just cannot deal with my father right now as well.
Sorry for the rant but just do not know what to do for the best...a mutual friend offered to go round with a fish and chip supper for his birthday, and I was hoping to maybe see how she found him, but he has said he does not want her to come. It is as if he has given up on life....yet he has no pain and is no longer breathless. Could this be dementia brought on by the stress of the heart problems? Yet the Consultant was happy with the reading and does not want to see him until next December.
He has also said he is going to disinherit me! I am fine about this but when I say he needs to change his will, he says he is not going to pay money to a solicitor.
Right now I would be happy if I never had to cast eyes on my husband or father again. Sick of trying to help two nasty selfish old men. They do not talk to one another after a falling out 3 years ago and this has caused me huge stress.
Sorry for the rant ...will ring Carers later today and see what they think.
