Won't go to bed

[Zinnia]

My dear husband (71) has had Alzheimer's for almost 10 years now. We are mainly coping with the slow decline of his abilities but tonight for the first time ever he's refused to come to bed and I'm sitting here in bed listening to him coughing( he has other medical problems). I've provided a pillow and duvet but not sure if he'll use them . I've hidden all the door keys in case he decides to 'go home' Not sure what else to do.....any advice out there please.

 

[Tin]

Well if you have hidden all keys and know he is safe all I can think of is that when he does fall asleep, in a chair or sofa, just go and check and cover him up if needed or gently wake and take him to his bed.

I am just waiting for my mum to fall asleep before I go to bed.

 

[lesley1958]

My dad is 92 was mixed AZ/VD. There are times when he point blank refuses to go to bed too (ans point blank refuses to get up, take medication....)

Luckily mum and dad live in a bungalow. The carer told mum that as long as the doors are locked the best thing to do is leave him. Trying to force him will just make things worse. So that's what she has done and he has either got himself to bed (maybe not quite undressed completely but there you go) or gone to find mum and she has helped him to bed.

At the carer's suggestion we have Telecare alarms on front and back doors so if someone does try to open the doors when the alarms are on the Telecare people immediately call and ask if everything is ok. That;s given mum more peace of mind.

Dementia always seems to be one step ahead - a bit like computer hackers! - and we can only do our best. And I'm sure that is what you are doing, and with love.

Wishing you strength

 

[pamann]

Hello Zinnia

If it is any help to you my husband has not been to bed for 2yrs, he is now in a care home still has not been to bed he sleeps on and off in the daytime, and wanders around all night. Two other residents do the same, its quite common with Alzheimers.]