Above all else, this is the question I'm asking myself more frequently, but I just can't seem to come up with a satisfactory solution. My aunt isn't cooperating with SS or the GP and refuses all offers of help so it's taking a long time to get any sort of diagnosis but at the moment it's 'Dementia Unspecified' based on a couple of MMSE tests and an assessment. She lives on her own in her own house and is used to going out to the shops visiting my mum each week. She copes well with these familiar journeys even though it means using the bus, crossing busy roads etc. Whenever we've tried to dissuade her from making trips by suggesting we get home deliveries or I go and get the shopping for her she gets very belligerent and agitated, almost aggressive towards us and we have to relent. A few weeks ago she lost her Santander debit card and decided she had to go to the local Nationwide branch to sort it out. There was no way to convince her this would be fruitless and in the end we decided the least stressful way forward was to let her go and I'd follow her to make sure she was safe and didn't become any more distressed. She went to Nationwide, then Nat West, then HSBC and back to Nationwide. She doesn't have an account with any of them and couldn't explain to any of the counter staff what she was there for. When I thought the time was right, I 'bumped into her coincidentally' and she came back to my mum's with me. By then she was calm again and seemed to not be that bothered about losing the card, but for a while I was very anxious about what might have happened to her in such a confused state of mind. Last Thursday, I was at mum's again and auntie was there telling us that she had to go to Oxford Street to buy a special clock because her TV wasn't working We couldn't work out what she meant, but she was determined to go and buy the clock personally despite not having been to central London for many years. I asked her to describe how she was going to get there and she described the trip well enough with the correct bus numbers, railway stations etc. so reluctantly again we accepted that there was nothing we could do to stop her. I should add that a few months ago I fitted a GPS tracker to the coat she always wears, so we do have some peace of mind. She cannot operate a mobile phone, so the tracker is the one safeguard we depend on. On Saturday, when she was due to make the trip, I am sitting in front of the PC all day keeping an eye on the tracker and sure enough she leaves the house at 4pm and makes it to the local railway station OK and I watch as she navigates all the way to Oxford Street and the store she wanted to visit. So now I'm thinking maybe I'm being over-protective and not giving her enough credit for being able to cope on her own. As often happens with dementia, just when you think everything is going well and things are actually improving, there's a sting in the tail. She leaves Oxford St. at 6.30pm and heads for Charing Cross station, but then the GPS trail goes cold and by 9pm it's still telling me she's at Charing Cross, so I ring the Police and report her as missing and alert her neighbour who is very good at keeping an eye out for her. By 10pm it's all getting a bit concerning but then I get a message from the neighbour that she's been brought back by the Police and is safe in her house again. What happened at Charing Cross we're still trying to piece together but it seems she was found wandering at 9:30pm by Police and they established where she lived and took her home. So now, I'm back to thinking we need to do something to stop her going on any unfamiliar trips on her own in case she gets confused or loses her money/card/keys. But the question remains unanswered as to what we can actually do. Is it just a case of waiting for each crises to happen until eventually one is so bad she ends up in hospital or being sectioned? It's not a great plan and one my mum is not going to find easy to accept, but I'm really at a loss to know what to do. I know this is a familiar story, but to me it seems worse due to the fact that neither my mum or myself lives local to my aunt so we just can't keep tabs on her as we would like to.