Apologies if this turns into a long post!!
My dad is deteriorating - no longer walks, toilets or feeds himself. He talks but only in a good day can we understand him. We now have carers in 3 times a day to help mum get him to toilet etc. The carers insisted a hoist was fitted in the bedroom but they messed my dad around so much & left him dangling while talking about him,
my mum has promised him she will never use it again. It was so upsetting - he was petrified. I know people think they're doing what's best but my mum knows my dad the best. Some people don't seem to realise how scared & frightened he is, I guess they see dementia so often to them it's just another person.
My mum has been advised by the nurse tending to dads feet that he would be better off in a home. Maybe he would but maybe it would add to his sadness. He knows he can't do what he used to & it's heartbreaking. He sleeps most of the time but still eats so I assume we have a way to go yet.
My mum looked round a home today but literally cannot leave him there she said. She can't put him there & walk away. I know she'd visit etc.
I just wondered if it is possible to keep them at home until the end. Yes it'll be very hard but surely not every dementia patient ends up in a home. I'm just feeling so sad about it all at the moment. My dad has turned into a sad, scared tiny man. It's heartbreaking - but we all know that. Some days I'm harder & know we've just got to help as much as we can but other days it's just too sad!!! Have or do others care for their loved ones at home & intend to until the end? I know it's very personal but just needed to write today!!! Thank you for your lovely answers as I know there will be some
My dad is deteriorating - no longer walks, toilets or feeds himself. He talks but only in a good day can we understand him. We now have carers in 3 times a day to help mum get him to toilet etc. The carers insisted a hoist was fitted in the bedroom but they messed my dad around so much & left him dangling while talking about him,
my mum has promised him she will never use it again. It was so upsetting - he was petrified. I know people think they're doing what's best but my mum knows my dad the best. Some people don't seem to realise how scared & frightened he is, I guess they see dementia so often to them it's just another person.
My mum has been advised by the nurse tending to dads feet that he would be better off in a home. Maybe he would but maybe it would add to his sadness. He knows he can't do what he used to & it's heartbreaking. He sleeps most of the time but still eats so I assume we have a way to go yet.
My mum looked round a home today but literally cannot leave him there she said. She can't put him there & walk away. I know she'd visit etc.
I just wondered if it is possible to keep them at home until the end. Yes it'll be very hard but surely not every dementia patient ends up in a home. I'm just feeling so sad about it all at the moment. My dad has turned into a sad, scared tiny man. It's heartbreaking - but we all know that. Some days I'm harder & know we've just got to help as much as we can but other days it's just too sad!!! Have or do others care for their loved ones at home & intend to until the end? I know it's very personal but just needed to write today!!! Thank you for your lovely answers as I know there will be some