Waiting for a Diagnosis

[KatoEarby56]

My wife is showing all the symptoms of Vascular Dementia and after taking advice from this site I wrote a letter to our doctors. Unfortunately, to defend my dishonesty, the doctor is not making any quick progress and my wife is resisting visiting the doctors. She has had her first assessment when she was called for her flue jab and at that time there was enough evidence for further investigation, but she has only agreed to go back in early November. The trouble is that she knows there is something wrong, but not what, and is being very difficult to live with. I don't know what her mood is from one moment to another and I am having difficulty coping with some of the new silly rules she is thinking off. All of these are illogical and difficult to live with. Is there anyone having similar problems and more to the point how do they cope?

 

[jay6]

Hi and welcome to the forum. Hope you get lots of help on here.
My OH has vascular dementia and totally dismisses the fact there is anything wrong, like so many others with dementia. He is very hard to live with and has mood changes frequently. Mainly when things aren't going his way.
I find the best way to cope (and it's taken me months) is to just try and ignor as much as I can and let him get on with things. Mainly sitting on sofa in front of TV.
I battle trying to get him to appointments. If I say something he doesn't like e.g. asked him if he is going to do something, like a poo test he should have done 3 weeks ago. I just get abuse. Nothing is ever his fault. I'm this or that.
So best advice I can give is to try and not let it get to you, don't argue as there's no point and try getting help from local Alzheimer's etc. easier said than done!

 

[KatoEarby56]

Hi and welcome to the forum. Hope you get lots of help on here.
My OH has vascular dementia and totally dismisses the fact there is anything wrong, like so many others with dementia. He is very hard to live with and has mood changes frequently. Mainly when things aren't going his way.
I find the best way to cope (and it's taken me months) is to just try and ignor as much as I can and let him get on with things. Mainly sitting on sofa in front of TV.
I battle trying to get him to appointments. If I say something he doesn't like e.g. asked him if he is going to do something, like a poo test he should have done 3 weeks ago. I just get abuse. Nothing is ever his fault. I'm this or that.
So best advice I can give is to try and not let it get to you, don't argue as there's no point and try getting help from local Alzheimer's etc. easier said than done!

Thanks so much I just thought it was me. I can see a lot of us are in the same position.

 

[jay6]

Thanks so much I just thought it was me. I can see a lot of us are in the same position.

It's not you, we are all in same boat here. You definitely aren't alone trying to cope. It's good we can all rant and get things off our chest here.
We are all at different stages so can learn and get help from others further down the line.
We just don't know what is next and have to live each day as it comes unfortunately. Stay strong Kato, easier said than done!