Hi my mum is 71 and was diagnosed about 6 years ago, she lives with my dad who is her carer. We both need a little advice as to what to do. She is able to go to the toilet on her own but doesn't use toilet paper for either, while having a wee this is ok but not for the other. We don't know when she goes for a poo so aren't able to intervene. She does on many occasions use the towels to wipe herself- don't know why maybe its more visble, is there any help and advice anyone can offer. My mum has no idea who anyone is or what anything is she has very little understanding of anything but is still quite fit and mobile. My dad can't keep tabs on her all the time as she wanders round a lot and talks to people who aren't there and then tells my dad shes not doing something as this imaginary person has said she doesn't have to. I rambling now sorry - we have lost the person who was my mum but need to make this different person happy and content if thats makes sense.
Toilet help needed.
- Thread starter beckibee
- Start date
Sorry i have no answers, my mother did the same, I used to leave small quest towels for her to use, this continued untill she eventually became incontenent and stopped going to the bathroom altogether.
We had this with mum, she threw away endless pairs of knickers because she knew they were dirty but didn't know what to do with them. - I ended up buying dozens of pairs from a cheap high street store beginning with p.
There is little you can do, we just had to try to persuade mum into a bath quite often which was well nigh impossible. She never seemed to get sore so that may be some consolation to you, and now she wears pull up incontinence pants which are wonderful, we get them from the incontinence nurse.
If you can stomach it then just keep asking about whether she needs help when she goes to the loo, to our enormous surprise mum eventually accepted help, and keep offering baths and help in the bath too.
There is little you can do, we just had to try to persuade mum into a bath quite often which was well nigh impossible. She never seemed to get sore so that may be some consolation to you, and now she wears pull up incontinence pants which are wonderful, we get them from the incontinence nurse.
If you can stomach it then just keep asking about whether she needs help when she goes to the loo, to our enormous surprise mum eventually accepted help, and keep offering baths and help in the bath too.
Hi there,
Totally sympathise, we are looking after mum at home she is 85 and was diagnosed 2 years ago, in the past week she has stopped using the toilet completely. Have tried the usual advise, changed the toilet seat to a bright colour, amongst other things but nothing is working. Having to change/clean up to 5 times a day. Any advice would be greatly received!
Totally sympathise, we are looking after mum at home she is 85 and was diagnosed 2 years ago, in the past week she has stopped using the toilet completely. Have tried the usual advise, changed the toilet seat to a bright colour, amongst other things but nothing is working. Having to change/clean up to 5 times a day. Any advice would be greatly received!
If you google Signate for dementia then hit images you will see a variety of signs. Majority are against a yellow background. You could make an arrow one pointing to the toilet paper by printing on to yellow card and see if it works. I might also make a wash your hands sign too. If they are successful then you could make others for other areas of the house.
Fiona
Fiona
Hello Stourie , Welcome to TP
My apologies if you have already tried this or your mum refuses, says no.
could you try taking mum to the toilet at regular intervals , it may also be necessary to actually supervise/help mum as it is possible mum may have forgotten how/be unable to use the toilet.
I would do two things
1) As this is a sudden change, I would try to get a sample of urine to be tested for infection, I know its going to be difficult.
Any infection can cause a sudden deterioration, which often but not always improves once the infection has cleared up.
2) Contact the Continence nurse, via mums GP practice, their receptionist should be able to put you in contact with them, without you having to speak to the GP.
They will come and do an assessment, then let you know what they can provide.
In the meantime you obviously need help to hopefully prevent accidents and so much clearing up.
I have heard but never tried them ,that Pull ups are good, these are an all in one product similar to normal undersear. if you buy incontinenc products online you can claim VAT relief, google incontinence supplies.
many supermarkets and chemists sell pads, pull ups
You may also need to think of bed and chair protection, the continence service should be able to help their too.
Hope this helps
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