Well at last the day has arrived, husbands results from MRI. I'm feeling so anxious not knowing how he's going to react, will he be angry? Will he be upset? Will they stop him driving? Will he let me tell our children? Will be so glad when this day is over and I have some answers. After knowing somethings been wrong for so long, dealing with it on my own, trying to do the best I could, it will be better knowing what it is and being able to plan for the future, whatever that might be. Sorry no questions, just needed to put my thoughts down. Bless you all for being there, the support from you all has been so appreciated. Thank you I'm sure I'll be on here in the years to come. ❤️
Today's the day
- Thread starter Newanne
- Start date
Thinking of you today @Newanne and sending you positive vibes to face the challenges ahead. Knowledge must be better than all this uncertainty. As you say, then you can start planning, but take your time. Nothing is going to change dramatically and suddenly, so allow yourself time to process what you learn today.
Thanks DeeCee7, yes I keep reminding myself a diagnosis will not make things speed up. I think it's just my husband's reactions that worry me most. He is a very private and proud person, he feels ashamed that hes not the man he was, but the idea of dementia has scared him so much. I really don't know what to expect as he has changed so much over the last 2y. It's hard when you can't say, things will get better, 😔
Well it's done. My poor husband has Alzheimer's. I knew, I have known for the past 2y or more but hearing it is hard to cope with. My OH reaction was stony, he didn't engage at all but sat staring at the floor untill they ask for my telepone number, "what do you want HER number for? Way is there information for HER?" Hmmmm no empathy or understanding from him about how this is effecting me then.
They are starting him on memantine has anyone on here experienced this?
They are starting him on memantine has anyone on here experienced this?
I'm so sorry that you have got the diagnosis you dreaded. It is hard to hear even though you were expecting it. Your husband has some understanding and so he's bound to be upset. I wouldn't discuss the diagnosis with him for the time being unless he brings it up. Nothing is going to change overnight but at least you know what you're dealing with.
My elderly friend had Memantine but I don't know whether it was helpful. She didn't appear to have any side effects from it.
My elderly friend had Memantine but I don't know whether it was helpful. She didn't appear to have any side effects from it.
Difficult for you, difficult for him. I remember clearly us being told, funny how you know and have known for ages but somehow it’s still a shock. Initially my husband had no empathy for me, still doesn’t much, but he does sometimes try now. This forum has been the greatest support I have found. The best advice I can give is for you both to take it one day at a time and remember this is NOT the end for either of you. 6 years in and we still have wonderful times together, with family, and with friends. Try not to worry, it doesn’t stop anything happening only spoils what you’ve got now, and concentrate on what you can both do not what you can’t. Sending you virtual hugs.
Do sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis @Newanne
Try not to blame him too much for being cross when he felt he was being overlooked when you were asked for your phone number. This will have been a red rag for him when you were asked and he wasn’t. It was as if it was presumed he wouldn’t know his own phone number.
However shocked and upset you are , this will be a steep learning curve. I hope you will have the strength and insight to tread on eggshells.
I’m so glad you found the forum in good time. There’ll be lots of support for you here and a safe place to offload.
PS.
I’ve just seen you joined the forum in 2010. I can’t believe how long it`s taken for you to get a diagnosis. No wonder you’re worn out.
Try not to blame him too much for being cross when he felt he was being overlooked when you were asked for your phone number. This will have been a red rag for him when you were asked and he wasn’t. It was as if it was presumed he wouldn’t know his own phone number.
However shocked and upset you are , this will be a steep learning curve. I hope you will have the strength and insight to tread on eggshells.
I’m so glad you found the forum in good time. There’ll be lots of support for you here and a safe place to offload.
PS.
I’ve just seen you joined the forum in 2010. I can’t believe how long it`s taken for you to get a diagnosis. No wonder you’re worn out.
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Thanks grannie G. I first joined when I was caring for MIL who had mixed dementia. I found it so helpful then, when i started having concerns aboy OH i revisited and yes its still a lifeline that's help me over some bad times already. Sonehow I feel more able to try to help others now that OH has a diagnosis. I give thanks to everyone on here every day. ❤❤
always give good advice violet Jane. Thank you, you've helped me over some difficult times. Sending love and hugs. ❤