The hardest words to say are “I cannot cope anymore”. Tomorrow my OH will go into a care home as finally I have said those words. This is my first post although I have often reviewed the chat and threads they have helped over the last few years. My OH is very fit and well physically and I feel I am depriving him of his liberty. But he is not safe if left alone although he disputes this. The guilt is immense, but I am no longer a wife our relationship Is so diminished. My children are supportive but oh this is so difficult. I have already supported my mum who had dem3ntia and died in 2016 I have found itmuch more difficult with my Oh. Probably because of 5he previous knowledge an£ experience. Over the last 18 months it has been so difficult I may have coped longer with respite but there was no help unless “-we were in crisis”. With mum we had an excellent admiral nurse but no one like that with OH. All you other carers out there look after yourselves you are important too.