1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. Curlie

    Curlie Registered User

    Jul 24, 2007
    21
    South East London
    Sorry i have not been on here for quite a while but always know i can turn to this site when i need some help and advice.I first came on here when i thought that my mother in law was showing signs of dementia although the rest of the family were pushing it under the carpet.Not that they did not care but because i think they were all frightened of the unknown.

    When i was last on here, it was confirmed to us that mum was suffering from vascular dementia ( excuse the spelling.)After a lot of research , including alot of help from you all, mum now recieves the help that she is entitled to. This has been made harder though because of tha fact that as a family we have all agreed that it was best, that mum did not know she had this illness.This is due to the fact that she has always been a worrier and it would make her upset and fret more.Plus mum is at that stage now where she would not understand the illness.

    Right, getting back to the reason why i have come on here today. Mum is having trouble telling the time and also what part of the day it actually is. I wonder if any of you knew of a site or company that sold clocks that would help. I have been on a few sites that we have bought from before, including the photo telephone ( which i must add is brill) but none of them have what we reqire. Mum can no longer identify between letters ,digits and spaces so we need a clock that once pressed would speak the time and wheather it was morning or night.

    Thanks and hope to hear something soon. x x
     
  2. Linda Mc

    Linda Mc Registered User

    Jul 3, 2005
    1,881
    Nr Mold
    #2 Linda Mc, Jan 22, 2008
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2008
    Just a thought maybe there are speaking clocks for the blind? Worth googling to see.

    Linda x

    UPDATE

    I tried typing speaking clocks in the search engine and lots came up. The one I looked at said whether it was day or night.
     
  3. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    Hello Curlie,

    Welcome back. I do know there are clocks available for blind people-press and it tells you the time...

    Am sure someone will come up with a website where you can buy these things..or maybe-hopefully-even better suggestions.

    Just a thought though..it might not make that much difference to mum/MIL..if she is on her own..she may just do what she wants anyway..

    Sorry..not much help really..It may be that you need to have a reassessment of her needs..?

    Love Gigi xx
     
  4. DickG

    DickG Registered User

    Feb 26, 2006
    558
    Stow-on-the-Wold
    Hi Curlie

    Gigi's remarks ring a bell with me. Does your mum have any concept of time or the difference between day and night? Often dementia sufferers are desperate to give the impression that they have a hold on reality when the reverse is true. I have often spent a lot of time and effort trying to address these problems only to find that all that was needed was a hug and reassurance.

    I don't have answers but sometimes the right questions are more important.

    Dick
     
  5. 117katie

    117katie Guest

    Hello Curlie!

    We had the same problem a year back, but we couldn't find an "acceptable" talking clock - well, it might have been acceptable to us, but not to .... YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, DON'T YOU!

    So, the next best thing we found was a digital clock, showing the time, day of the week, date and month AND RADIO CONTROLLED so that it is always correct ... from a well known shop beginning with ARG... and ending with OS!

    The magic touch was that we bought an exact-same clock, which we placed in our room too, so whenever we phoned, we had immediate connection and communication, and we could say "IT IS NOW 5 O'CLOCK AND 10 MINUTES EXACTLY"!!

    And we could always say "Look at the clock - look at the clock" which we had placed on the wall, so we knew where it was in relation to the phone!

    Worked a treat!! From Day One Onwards!

    Might not work for everyone - but it worked for us!

    KT
     
  6. TinaT

    TinaT Registered User

    Sep 27, 2006
    7,095
    Bolton
    Can't help with a talking clock but in Liverpool they have been trialling a telephone. Instead of numbers the phone had pictures of the family members. If the appropriate picture was pressed then the phone automatically dialled the number and also came onto hands free speaker mode. It was a great success and has helped some dementia suffers. However for those of you who get telephone calls from your loved ones at all hours of the day or night, please ignore this and pretend you never even read it. I will hunt out the contact information if anyone is interested in this. xxTinaT
     
  7. sue38

    sue38 Registered User

    Mar 6, 2007
    10,856
    Wigan, Lancs
    We have the same problem with my Dad in that he often gets up at 3 in the morning, has a shower, gets dressed and then complains that my Mum 'lies in bed all day' (in fact she gets up about 7.45 a.m.).

    This morning he was up at 4 and complaining that my Mum had told him to go back to bed. I asked him was it very early when he got up?
    Dad- Oh no
    Me- What time was it?
    Dad- I'm not sure
    Me- Was it light?
    Dad- Er...yes I think so
    Me- Had the papers arrived?
    Dad- Er...no
    Me- So it must have been pretty early then?
    Dad- I see it's stopped raining...

    I think mostly he can tell the time he justs forgets to look at the clock so I'm not sure a talking clock would help (he'd just wouldn't think to press it) but I did find this on the RNIB website
    http://onlineshop.rnib.org.uk/display_item.asp?n=11&c=5&sc=14&id=2746&it=1&l=3&d=0

    In the meantime we might try the 'if the papers haven't arrived it's still night' strategy.
     
  8. Curlie

    Curlie Registered User

    Jul 24, 2007
    21
    South East London
    Thanks for all your replies.

    Evening everyone.

    Thank you so much for your advice and help on the talking clock saga.:)

    Most of which i have tried but thank you anyway.I think , as advised it may be a good idea to look at some sites for the blind.

    Tina the telephone you were talking about is one that we bought mum and it has been a god send. Yes we do get the early calls but at least we know she can contact us where as before she was unable to.I do know that the early calls are going to start to get to us, if i am being honest but we will just have to cope like everyone else does.

    I see a post on here where someone commented how they thought they had it bad until they read other peoples stories, how true that is.I do get days when i just want to cry for my mum in law,my family and for me. Days where i am so stressed that i just want to scream and days where i have to bite my tongue because mum was having a bad day. Then i realise what must she really be thinking and then i feel really guilty.

    What a wicked world.

    But then there is always this site to go on which to me is a saving grace. Funny i always try to hide my feelings but as soon as i start typing on here it just flows out and the guilt disappears.

    Once again a big thank you to you all.xxxx
     
  9. sek.kong

    sek.kong Registered User

    Aug 30, 2006
    17
    east anglia -ish
    Mum used to struggle at night to "read" the time and didn't twig whether it was day or night ( haven't we all had the phone calls in the middle of the night??) I got a talking clock from RNIB, it was about £40 then. The most ugly thing in the world, basically a red box, but it did the trick. Two buttons to press (the setting buttons are hidden under a cover-phew!) one tells you the date , one the time. It was a life saver (or at least a sleep saver!)She's past that stage now but it was brilliant.
     
  10. Curlie

    Curlie Registered User

    Jul 24, 2007
    21
    South East London
    Morning or night?

    Thanks for the clock site.


    I have seen the clock you are talking about and think it is great but my mother-in-law cannot get to grips with the am and pm aspect of the time.What we are trying to get her is some kind of clock which tells her if it is morning or night.

    Hopefully there is an inventor on here who could maybe design just the thing :):D

    xxxxx
     
  11. sek.kong

    sek.kong Registered User

    Aug 30, 2006
    17
    east anglia -ish
    Have you looked at the detailed info on it? I remember it had two types of time-telling like "3.27" or "nearly half past three" but can't remember if there's anything like "3.30 in the afternoon" I'll have a little play when I go round tomorrow.....:)
     
  12. Curlie

    Curlie Registered User

    Jul 24, 2007
    21
    South East London
    Great, let me know how it goes.

    I feel really good today, i spoke to some-one whose father has just been diagonised as having dementia.It was like looking in the mirror at me all those months ago. The reason i feel so good is because i was able to really help her.

    Of course i also told her how great this site was and how helpful everyone is ( proved by your earlier post.)She said she felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders as she has been trying to cope on her own.

    Pity some doctors and other agencies don't tell people about what is really out there.

    Time for me to ring mum to make sure she does not go to bed just yet.

    Enjoy your playing with time.

    x x x x
     
  13. sek.kong

    sek.kong Registered User

    Aug 30, 2006
    17
    east anglia -ish
    Had a play today......:)

    It either says 5.27 pm or "nearly half past 5" without mentioning morning or afternoon. Bother, I thought it would be Ok for you. Obviously that bit wasn't a problem for mum then (how soon we forget!) Other than that it's pretty foolproof. Ah well.....
    SK
     
  14. Curlie

    Curlie Registered User

    Jul 24, 2007
    21
    South East London
    You my not have had the result you was hoping for but boy you did put:) a smile on my face.


    Thank you for trying though.xxxxx
     
  15. poppet

    poppet Registered User

    Aug 3, 2007
    70
    hi,
    just to add...we got my mil one of the talking clocks as on 'sue38' link...it was easy to use but mil would only use it when we prompted and then it didnt seem to make much difference to her actually recognising the difference between her thinking and reality. adding to that...she would keep moving the clock 'losing' it or 'they' would keep moving it! so i guess that the success of these things is really dependent on how well you/they think they will get on with it...we do find that 'new' items/skills are too difficult for mil to learn so she will try just to please us...but actually its too hard for her to take on so she doesnt use it...

    good luck and best wishes

    poppet
     
  16. CraigC

    CraigC Registered User

    Mar 21, 2003
    6,630
    London
  17. Curlie

    Curlie Registered User

    Jul 24, 2007
    21
    South East London
    Firstly i think i have got the same as you Craig except mine is a little older, the snooze button is stuck and at the weekends he does not even believe that mornings exist. LOL

    After the conversation I had with mil, after checking she had not gone to bed to early, has made us realise that you could be right Poppet.We has along coversation about The Thing.

    " Did i know that she had broken the thing while she cleaned the thing, which she used in the thing for getting the thing clean".

    This lasted for about 15 mins then the guessing game began.I then slowly got it out of her that she had broken the carpet sweepe which she was using in the living room on the rug.She was pleased when i said i would get her one at the weekend but will she be able to use The Thing because her old was so old ,the new one will look completely differant.

    Well we will soon find out, if you see me post an add on here to sell the new Thing you know it didnt work LOL

    XXXXXX:rolleyes:
     

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