1. Patidlepm

    Patidlepm Registered User

    Oct 11, 2015
    2
    North Yorkshire
    My husband as been discharged from the local mental health unit. The only support we both have is our GP. Is this normal?
    I feel lonely and abandoned.
     
  2. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,731
    You do need support, we all do. This is the right place to start - lots of support, information and friendship on TP xxx

    It is hard to signpost you as you haven't said much about yourselves yet but this is a really really general post to start off xx Some or all of it mightbe what you need but hopefully something will be useful.

    If you have an Admiral Nurse in your area (you will need to google it) then lots of people have said how helpful they are.

    You can phone Social Services Adult Care Duty Desk and ask for an assessment if there have been no recommendations from the Unit - services like carers visiting to help with the daily routine/personal care or day care that should be an option - a day centre where your OH can go for lunch and activities. As well as our social services centre we also have Crossroads Day Centre where people can go for up to 3 days

    It is worth googling Dementia activities + your area to see what is going on. There is probably a fair bit but you need to search for it. Some care homes also do 'day care' which can be useful but I would try the day centres first

    You can also ask for a carers assessment - this will give you a break and give you some 'free' hours of help possibly. it might seem early days to be thinking of a 'break' but a few hours here and there is a good idea from as early on as you can.

    If you are not already getting it do apply for Attendance Allowance - the forms are a bit tricky in that you have to imagine the worst possible day and write down the help that OH needs (not the help that he gets but what he NEEDS). Attendance Allowance is not means tested and you should get it, if you need some help with the forms come back and ask Age UK are really good at helping with assessing what benefits you can claim and then they also help you fill in the forms - someone will come to your house. Age UK are also very good at practical advice and help - Age UK Advice line free national advice line that is open 365 days a year 24 hours a day. To talk to someone, just call 0800 169 2081.

    I would strongly advise you to join your local carers organisation - they usually have a carers cafe (and so do Alzheimers society in some areas) and it is worth a morning off to go and find out what help there is in your area over a cup of coffee - lots of friendship and support face to face and everyone in the same boat.

    If there are issues with incontinence all areas have a continence service - you will need to look up your Trust or google your area plus Continence Service. The continence nurses we have had have been wonderful and pads are supplied free by the NHS.


    The Dementia helpline is a useful number to have

    lzheimer's Society National Dementia Helpline 0300 222 1122 can provide information, support, guidance and signposting to other appropriate organisations.

    The Helpline is usually open from:
    9am - 8pm Monday to Wednesday
    9am - 5pm on Thursday and Friday
    10am - 4pm on Saturday and Sunday

    Come back and ask if there is anything you need to know - someone will know or can give practical tips or has had experience of it.
    Welcome to TP xxxx
     
  3. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,343
    Merseyside
    Great info from fizzie. Welcome to TP :)
     
  4. Patidlepm

    Patidlepm Registered User

    Oct 11, 2015
    2
    North Yorkshire
    Thanks

    Thank you for your reply. Sorry my first message was short but I was having a bad day. Just to let you know my husband who is 68 was diagnosed with Frontal Lobe Dementia in April. My life has been turned upside down. The placid, loving husband is now the opposite to what he was. He is not yet a candidate for Day care etc. He does not recognise anything wrong with him. He has had his driving license revoked so I have had to hide the car keys. Our brand new motorhome, scooter etc are being sold.
    People think he has Alzheimer's but this type of dementia is different.
    I am trying to set up a support group for carers of people with frontal lobe dementia in Nort Yorkshire (Scarborough area) if there is anyone out there let me know.
     
  5. Jess53

    Jess53 Registered User

    Mar 2, 2016
    1
    Support from a distance

    Having worked as a care manager for many years, we were recently faced with dementia in our family. Family is a great place for support, even if you need a sounding board or just need someone to share things with. Without sounding patronising, when faced with such things it's amazing to see the understanding that comes out, as well as ideas to help. With my father in law we just had to tell him the insurance had gone up and the premium was too much, which seemed to him a logical response to selling his car, hope this helps, Regards, Jess
     

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