I apologise in advance for the rant that is about to ensue!!!!!!!!!!!
Some of you may have read my posts in the I have a Partner with Dementia Forum over the last 3 years
after my husband went into residential care in 2015 then a Nursing Home in May 2017 after being diagnosed with Early onset Alzheimers Dementia and Parkinsons Disease in 2010. Unfortunately he died on 4th March this year after contracting a serious UTI, sepsis, pneumonia and if that wasn't enough he then contracted Australian flu!!!
I have had to deal with sorting out my husband's funeral (which was on 27th March) sorting out pensions and probate etc, my own grief ( Iam re-starting Counselling this Thursday) and now my Mother who was diagnosed with mixed Alzheimers Dementia in May 2017 has decided she is going to start kicking off!!
She has 4 Carers a day but doesn't think there is anything wrong with her. My brother and I are going to have to put child locks on the freezer as she keeps getting frozen ready meals out defrosting them in the microwave and then putting them, still warm, on the kitchen widow sill, food poisoning here we come!!!!
My brother lives in Suffolk about 2 and a half hours from where I and our Mum lives. Up until my husband died he reluctantly came home for a few days every now and again and I was left to deal with her and my husband's ever growing needs. I do her washing, ironing, shopping, pick up her prescriptions and I have to get her clothes out every day for the next day otherwise she doesn't change her underwear. She has turned into the most disagreable woman I have ever come across, just like her Sister who I had to deal with until she died in January 2013 from Parkinsons Disease. I am 65 and retired myself but had no idea I would spend the best years of my retirement this way!!! Last week she refused to be washed, 2 weeks ago she refused a bath. I am getting frequent phone calls from the Carers about things she is refusing to do and I am absolutely sick of it!!
My brother is a football fanatic and if his beloved team are playing (sometimes in Europe) he just books his trip and goes. I have to beg him to come home if I want some time away and after my husband died I told him I was going to go away and he could deal with Mum. Consequently he does come home to help more often, but only if it doesn't clash with football!!!
I have been looking into respite care so that I can go away when it suits me not my brother. I don't know if anyone has a similar experience?? I understand that my Mum's bungalow won't be included in a financial assessment (she has less than £13,000 in savings) as she still lives there and it would be respite care to allow me to go away. She has already had a financial assessment as she has some assistance from the Local Authority to help pay for her 4 Carers a day. Does anyone know if she would need another one for respite care or would the recent assessment be sufficient???
Sorry for the rant!!
Also we raised £300 after my husband died in lieu of flowers etc and split it 50/50 with the Parkinsons Disease charity and Alzheimers Dementia.
Some of you may have read my posts in the I have a Partner with Dementia Forum over the last 3 years
after my husband went into residential care in 2015 then a Nursing Home in May 2017 after being diagnosed with Early onset Alzheimers Dementia and Parkinsons Disease in 2010. Unfortunately he died on 4th March this year after contracting a serious UTI, sepsis, pneumonia and if that wasn't enough he then contracted Australian flu!!!
I have had to deal with sorting out my husband's funeral (which was on 27th March) sorting out pensions and probate etc, my own grief ( Iam re-starting Counselling this Thursday) and now my Mother who was diagnosed with mixed Alzheimers Dementia in May 2017 has decided she is going to start kicking off!!
She has 4 Carers a day but doesn't think there is anything wrong with her. My brother and I are going to have to put child locks on the freezer as she keeps getting frozen ready meals out defrosting them in the microwave and then putting them, still warm, on the kitchen widow sill, food poisoning here we come!!!!
My brother lives in Suffolk about 2 and a half hours from where I and our Mum lives. Up until my husband died he reluctantly came home for a few days every now and again and I was left to deal with her and my husband's ever growing needs. I do her washing, ironing, shopping, pick up her prescriptions and I have to get her clothes out every day for the next day otherwise she doesn't change her underwear. She has turned into the most disagreable woman I have ever come across, just like her Sister who I had to deal with until she died in January 2013 from Parkinsons Disease. I am 65 and retired myself but had no idea I would spend the best years of my retirement this way!!! Last week she refused to be washed, 2 weeks ago she refused a bath. I am getting frequent phone calls from the Carers about things she is refusing to do and I am absolutely sick of it!!
My brother is a football fanatic and if his beloved team are playing (sometimes in Europe) he just books his trip and goes. I have to beg him to come home if I want some time away and after my husband died I told him I was going to go away and he could deal with Mum. Consequently he does come home to help more often, but only if it doesn't clash with football!!!
I have been looking into respite care so that I can go away when it suits me not my brother. I don't know if anyone has a similar experience?? I understand that my Mum's bungalow won't be included in a financial assessment (she has less than £13,000 in savings) as she still lives there and it would be respite care to allow me to go away. She has already had a financial assessment as she has some assistance from the Local Authority to help pay for her 4 Carers a day. Does anyone know if she would need another one for respite care or would the recent assessment be sufficient???
Sorry for the rant!!
Also we raised £300 after my husband died in lieu of flowers etc and split it 50/50 with the Parkinsons Disease charity and Alzheimers Dementia.
