Sharp knife etc problem. Please help!

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Reds, Jul 25, 2015.

  1. Reds

    Reds Registered User

    Sep 5, 2011
    541
    Hertfordshire
    Hi all

    My husband has Alzheimer's at 62. The main problem I have at the moment is that he seems to think JOKING in an aggressive way with sharp knives or any type of potential weapon funny!

    I really don't know what to do about it, I have tried to explain to him in anyway I can. We had a meal with friends in a restaurant last night, but still had to be silly with the cutlery. One lady at a table nearby looked concerned when he attempted to take knives out of a container there.

    The other week he walked into the sitting room with a sharp knife in each hand, looking mean but he said its his humour! He also managed to take hold of a Stanley knife and he really doesn't think this kind of joking is funny!

    I despair. Any suggestions appreciated please. I have hidden sharp cutlery. He has even picked up brooms as though they are a weapon or gardening tools, even a glass. I do try and find out why but he says he thinks its funny.

    Reds x
     
  2. Long-Suffering

    Long-Suffering Registered User

    Jul 6, 2015
    425
    Gosh Reds,

    Don't know what to suggest about that one except to speak to your GP. Hopefully it's just a phase he's going through.

    LS
     
  3. Kjn

    Kjn Registered User

    Jul 27, 2013
    5,835
    Oh reds wish I had an answer , I hope someone can help xx
     
  4. Reds

    Reds Registered User

    Sep 5, 2011
    541
    Hertfordshire
    Thanks kjn. Very tricky problem as you can imagine.

    Any other comments from others appreciated please!

    Reds x
     
  5. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,777
    Female
    South coast
    Crumbs, I hope its just a phase too

    Apart from locking anything sharp/dangerous up I cant think of anything. Sorry
     
  6. Reds

    Reds Registered User

    Sep 5, 2011
    541
    Hertfordshire
    Ah thanks.

    I can't believe this problem has occurred. My husband can be so 'ok' and yet these moment have occurred! Someone who finds the news so interesting, enjoys doing sudukos, word searches, helping around the house wants to joke with knives!!! I also can't believe he can't see reason with this!!

    I don't want my husband to go into a care home as so much can be good and yet I can't help it crossing my mind when he jokes with knifes! However, it probably isn't acceptable anywhere and don't want him tranquilised when so much can be ok!

    Sooooo frustrated!! Its feels very surreal hiding kitchen knives! However can I stop him doing this!

    Reds
     
  7. susy

    susy Registered User

    Jul 29, 2013
    801
    North East
    The only thing I can think of here is using distraction. Hopefully get him off this "amusement" and on to something else. Xx
     
  8. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,777
    Female
    South coast
    My husband has possible FTD and inappropriate "jokes" are becoming more common (though fortunately not involving knives) and he cant for the life of him see why they are inappropriate! Reason is an early casualty with dementia - I wouldnt bother trying to reason with him, Id try distraction like suzy suggests. Although it wont solve the problems it will hopefully stop it escalating.
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,863
    Kent
    The only thing I can think of is to hide all sharp knives , substitute them with blunt ones and tell him he makes you nervous when he jokes with knives so you`ve got rid of them.

    I don`t know your husband Reds, so I`ve no idea how he would react to this. It`s what I did with Dhiren when he wasn`t joking and threatened me with a knife, but he went into assessment and I got rid of the knives while he was away.
     
  10. LYN T

    LYN T Registered User

    Aug 30, 2012
    6,962
    Brixham Devon
    My OH didn't 'joke' with knives BUT he did use to take them out of drawers and walk about with them-a disaster just waiting to happen. I hid them all. I kept the bare minimum in the hoover box in a cupboard.
     
  11. Reds

    Reds Registered User

    Sep 5, 2011
    541
    Hertfordshire
    Thanks all!

    Yes I agree no point in trying to reason with him, although I like to think at least I did try.

    Have hidden sharp things at home but its a problem in restaurants, not that we often. I just can't see why he thinks its funny so its frustrating. He thinks people do laugh about it. He really isn't at the stage to go into care and I don't want him to, however, when he does something silly with a knife it makes me wonder at the time!

    I have said its not what a 62 year old should be joking about and that I can't tolerate this particular thing and will have to tell the doctor. He has childlike behaviour at times but I really can't understand why an illness would cause him to think such a thing funny.

    I said if someone came up to me in a tea room with a knife what would he think and he said he would laugh his head off! He said he would only do something if he thought the person was going to use it!

    This is so frustrating for me, I find the situation ridiculous.

    Reds x
     
  12. Reds

    Reds Registered User

    Sep 5, 2011
    541
    Hertfordshire

    Hope you ok Grannie G and thank you for reply. This prob is such a nuisance. I have hidden anything sharp and use a dinner knife as much as poss in the kitchen so at least he doesn't visually see sharp knives as a reminder to be silly with them. I think I have to take the matter seriously but I don't know how to 'treat' the matter seriously. At least its not all the time and only occasionally but more just lately. Sometimes I think oh well perhaps he will forget to do it again! Thanks, Reds x
     

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