Shared rooms in care homes...

[Bristolbelle]

I wonderd if anyone else had experience of thier loved one sharing a room in a care home. I'm just worried that if MUm did this she might touch the other perosn things (she likes to rearrange stuff, and tidy-up). She is also a very modest person and I worry how she will sope with undressing etc.
I know this is a long-term worry that may (God willing) never materialise, but it's one more I want off of my tick list.

 

[Lynne]

Belle, I'm sure the concerns you have voiced will be very common ones. As there are a few contributors to TP now who work in residential care homes or related fields (thinking Danny, SamIam & others I can't recall right now) I'm sure they will be able to reassure you about how they deal with such issues.

Also, if you are in touch with any local establishments (perhaps re. respite?) I'm sure the manager would discuss it with you if you ask.

 

[Bristolbelle]

Lynne...

thanks. Respite is not a problem as for now she is self funding so I would pay the extra to make sure she has a private room. I'm worried about the possibilities in the future when her savings may have evaporated.

 

[Canadian Joanne]

My mother was in a shared room in a retirement home, moved to a private room, then in a private room in the nursing home and now is in a shared room again.

We had no choice at the beginning with the retirement home and it worked out okay until Mum began to get aggressive. She pushed her 84 year old roommate over but no damage, thank God! Eventually we moved her to a private room because of her aggression. This we kept up in the nursing home, as her aggression remained. Now, since she's in a wheelchair, we no longer have to worry about violent outbreaks.

At first my mother seemed to enjoy the company. As for the tidying up etc I wouldn't worry too much about it. People tend to drift in and out of rooms and things often go missing. It's just part of dealing with the disease. I simply don't have anything there that is valuable, either sentimentally or otherwise.

You may find your mother's ideas about modesty change also. Did she share a bedroom as a child? That might make it easier in the long run.

 

[danny]

Hi Bristlbelle,Lynne and Joanne.

Not much help afraid as I only really deal with community care,ie day care and domiciliary.

However,I would have thought that these queries are common place and the home would probably have to sort these things out quite often.
I also understand that most shared rooms have a screen available to provide and maintain dignity when dressing etc if needed.
Hope someone will come along with a bit more inspiration

 

[Sandy]

Hi Belle,

I can only add that when I was looking at homes for my in-laws, double rooms seemed to be relatively rare.

Regardless of funding constraints, I don't think that any local authority would force someone into an arrangement that was clearly unsuitable for their needs.

So if, by some strange set of circumstances, your mum was placed in a double room and she found it uncomfortable/unacceptable, I don't think that she would be made to stay in that type of room.

Take care,

 

[Bristolbelle]

The latest....

After a long chat with Mum's keyworker at the daycentre/respite centre she goes to I was told that there is no way Mum would be assessed as needing anything more than basic residential care at present. So that rules out the home I was interested in as it's a nursing home. I thought if people had a diagnosis of dementia they automatically qualified for a higher rate of care, but it appears I'm wrong - any other advice on that welcome.
Also as I was ringing other plces I discovered that my district (Bristol) has a lower ceiling on what they will pay for care they fund to North Somerset, although the person I was speaking to would not tell me what either rate was. They also told me the rate for private care was different to the local authority careSo the way I figure it there are three rates for the same room, and same level of care! Surely this makes no sense at all(other than profiteering) if someone buys a bag of sugar at the supermarket no one knows what salary they are on or who is paying for it, they still get a standard bag of sugar, so why is care different? Do the "poor" get kitchen scraps or second bath water? I'm beginning to think they will bring back the workhouses soon.
I know it sounds awful but I'm now working on the option of increasing her respite at the place she is familiar with (£643 pw) and praying God will take her before she needs permanent care.

 

[Charlyparly]

Hi,

From my experience working in residential / nursing home settings, those who have shared bedrooms get on like a house on fire and would not have it any other way. At one point, we almost had to “prove” to the then CSCI that this was their preference.

I wouldn’t worry too much about the other person having a fierce dislike of anyone else rearranging or tidying up their things. If they did, it is highly unlikely they would be agreeable to share a room to begin with.

All shared bedrooms should have privacy screens or curtains in place (this isn’t a case of it being ideal – it’s a requirement) and both people should have their own toiletries, flannels and towels and use of their own commode if necessary.

You would be surprised just how many people actually prefer sharing a bedroom to be honest, so if and when this one should ever become a very real dilemma – I’d try not to worry too much at all.

 

[Bristolbelle]

Charlyparly....

thanks for such a positive take on it all.