Sad

[Sphynx]

I just need somewhere to put this where people will understand. I went to see my beautiful mother yesterday. She has skin cancer on her neck and it’s hurting her and looks awful. Consultant said they really can’t do anything. GP has prescribed pain patches and I think they are really affecting her despite being a low dose. She seems 100 times more frail, very unsteady on her feet. I can’t understand what she wants. She has been non verbal for a few years now, but normally I can make out what she needs from facial expressions, body language etc. Normally I take some comfort in bringing her some sweets which she loves and having a cup of tea with her which she also loves, but she wouldn’t eat or drink yesterday. I started crying and just couldn’t stop. The only thing I can say (and it’s a big thing) is that the carers at her home really do seem to care about Mum. I feel like she is being cared for. I think I thought she would be the same until the end, but I know now I was just fooling myself and it’s going to get so much worse. I don’t know how I can stand it.

 

[Kevinl]

Sadly we all have days like you're having, lost mum and wife to AZ, caring is hard but when you find yourself alone that's even harder.
I'd do it all again if I could, just try hard as it is to enjoy the time you have left together. K

 

[DeeCee7]

I just need somewhere to put this where people will understand. I went to see my beautiful mother yesterday. She has skin cancer on her neck and it’s hurting her and looks awful. Consultant said they really can’t do anything. GP has prescribed pain patches and I think they are really affecting her despite being a low dose. She seems 100 times more frail, very unsteady on her feet. I can’t understand what she wants. She has been non verbal for a few years now, but normally I can make out what she needs from facial expressions, body language etc. Normally I take some comfort in bringing her some sweets which she loves and having a cup of tea with her which she also loves, but she wouldn’t eat or drink yesterday. I started crying and just couldn’t stop. The only thing I can say (and it’s a big thing) is that the carers at her home really do seem to care about Mum. I feel like she is being cared for. I think I thought she would be the same until the end, but I know now I was just fooling myself and it’s going to get so much worse. I don’t know how I can stand it.

Oh @Sphynx I am so sorry to hear your cry of anguish. You will somehow find the strength within you to support your beautiful mum. Just by being there and holding her hand, by being you, her adored child. Sending you a warm hug.

 

[Jessie5]

Sending you a big hug. It is really hard to see them like this and hard when they take a dip. My Mum broke her hip this week and she just so frail and vulnerable in hospital I cried remembering who she used to be.

There is huge comfort in knowing the care your loved one received is good and kind.

Sending you strength.