Registered User
Feb 26, 2007
north yorkshire
Took George for his second visit to Respite care home for the day, arrived about ten oclock.

On arriving George refuse d to get out of car, said he would just sit there. said that very well I would just go in, on that he got out of car, wasnot looking very happy.

Staff greeted us, and told them he had felt threatned or uncumfortable where he was seated the last time he was there.

George deaf, does not tune hearing aids in, if he remembers to put them in. Also has no speech and also has difficulty swallowing, as so many of these patiens seem to have,

Well having settled him in easy chair and going to sit next to him for while, one member asking him if he would like tea and toast ,another member of staff hustled me up and told me to go home and relax.

Must say felt upset and guilty at leaving him, but knew have to do it.
They brought him home in the bus about 5oclock. He just waved them goodbye, staff managed to tell me he had just sat alone all day and had his dinner on his own. Have not had any feeback on his day at all , Just came in had tea and watched Tv. Not a word or deed, just cannot make any sense of it at all.
And there was I upset and worrying about him all day. Still have not had a word.
The home is very nice and staff very good,

So it looks as though he will have a day a week, am hoping will be able to get him picked up and that would be good help. Lizbet
Am going to get out next Sunday and take advantage of break. Lizbet


Registered User
Jan 4, 2006
Well done Lizbet, it cannot have been an easy day for you - hope that you have a good day next wek.
Love Helen


Registered User
Feb 22, 2006
sort of north east ish
lizbet said:
staff managed to tell me he had just sat alone all day and had his dinner on his own.
It sounds like it was hard for you, but you do need a break.

Your description of George sounds very like my dad always was - he never interacted with the other people either in respite or nursing home. I think it was largely because he was deaf, and like you say about George, kept forgetting to use his hearing aids. Then again, he tended to just enjoy his own company before he was ill, so maybe he was just being himself. I guess what I'm saying is that it's not necessarily a bad sign that George was on his own all day ....... socialising doesn't suit everyone.


Registered User
Feb 24, 2006
When my mother was in respite the staff said "she walks around and talks to everyone" in some surprise. They were obviously used to guests who just sat around and hardly spoke.

(They were obviously expecting her to go back for more short-term stays.)


Registered User
Aug 9, 2005
Dear Lizbet,
Please try to enjoy your respite and not worry about George. I agree that having him picked up would probably be better for both of you.
I hope your next respite day is less worrying and more relaxing.
Take good care of yourself.

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Dear Lizbet,

You`ve got through the first hurdle and it could have been a lot worse. Now you can move on.

I hope you begin to be able to relax and make the most of your `days off` . I`m sure you will benefit from them.

Take care.