Red toilet seats etc.

[Josoap]

My husband was diagnosed with Dementia in 2015 and is now going downhill at a faster rate. I have been having terrible problems with him leaving a hideous mess all over the bathroom floor and thought it was only my husband. I now find this is a common problem due to the cognitive bit of the brain not working correct way. I had never heard anything about others with Dementia (In the 3 years since diagnosis) having this wful problem!! I have been so thrilled and relieved - I thought my poor man was doing it on purpose why has no one ever told me? At least it would not have been such a terrible shock. I have been reading all about others going through the same thing and feel so much better knowing I am not alone and that there is a solution even if it does not work for long! I presume no one mentions it at drop ins or other Dementia events for the same reason as me - because it is such a horrid subject. I will certainly be mentioning in future if only to prevent some other poor carer getting the same shock as I did. It does not make it go away but just sharing these things, no matter how bad can help. Thank you to all who have written on this forum. I am so glad I have found you all. I am off to purchase the said red sea and grab rails and will let you know how I get on.
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[Josoap]

Hello @Josoap and welcome to Talking Point. If you have been reading the posts, (like we all do before we decide to join), then you will know that sadly many of us here are amateur experts when it comes to toileting and incontinence and all the ghastliness that goes with it. Also sadly, this is one of the subjects that is just not brought up when dementia is being discussed by health professionals and so most of us are not forewarned. Very little is said about what to expect as we advance along the dementia path with our loved one. I have learned so much from Talking Point myself along the way, we all learn from each other because there is always someone else in a similar situation, no matter how alone you may feel with a particular problem.

Grab rails are great and so are raised toilet seats that you can fit yourself. Some are on frames and stand over the toilet separately, some are installed to replace the toilet seat itself and come with or without additional arms for support. Not so sure about the red toilet seat although I do remember a social worker telling me that red is more visible to someone with dementia. I also remember telling the social worker that a red toilet seat would not help my Mum much as she could not recognise the bathroom to go in, let alone the toilet seat! I found putting a notice on the doors helpful, saying "Toilet" or "bedroom" etc. (in red type) and my Mum often needed to read these to find her way. In case you think we are in a mansion, we are only in a small 2 bedroom flat but it may just as well have been a maze to Mum at times. I hope you find all the help you need on TP at any time of the day or night.

Hello @Josoap and welcome to Talking Point. If you have been reading the posts, (like we all do before we decide to join), then you will know that sadly many of us here are amateur experts when it comes to toileting and incontinence and all the ghastliness that goes with it. Also sadly, this is one of the subjects that is just not brought up when dementia is being discussed by health professionals and so most of us are not forewarned. Very little is said about what to expect as we advance along the dementia path with our loved one. I have learned so much from Talking Point myself along the way, we all learn from each other because there is always someone else in a similar situation, no matter how alone you may feel with a particular problem.

Grab rails are great and so are raised toilet seats that you can fit yourself. Some are on frames and stand over the toilet separately, some are installed to replace the toilet seat itself and come with or without additional arms for support. Not so sure about the red toilet seat although I do remember a social worker telling me that red is more visible to someone with dementia. I also remember telling the social worker that a red toilet seat would not help my Mum much as she could not recognise the bathroom to go in, let alone the toilet seat! I found putting a notice on the doors helpful, saying "Toilet" or "bedroom" etc. (in red type) and my Mum often needed to read these to find her way. In case you think we are in a mansion, we are only in a small 2 bedroom flat but it may just as well have been a maze to Mum at times. I hope you find all the help you need on TP at any time of the day or night.

 

[Josoap]

Thank you so much for your reply, I already feel so much better about this awful journey but have been surprised about the amount I have learnt about red toilet seats and red grab rails. I am aware that as my husband progresses on his journey, they may not help for all of it. However, there is so much knowledge and information around I sm actually feeling quite uplifted and am certainly going to bring the subject up at this week's Drop In discussion. I have learnt today that the colour white is the worst colour for Dementia sufferers and is the first colour the usually loose due to breakdown of the cognitive powers, hence red is very good supposedly - I will post when I have discovered if it works for my husband. I do hope it does, even if for a short while if only to give me respite from the scrubbing and cleaning of our two loos constantly. Hubby bless him does not know he is doing anything wrong .
and says it is not him and does not understand why I permantly cleaning the loos. Hope your Mum keeps reasonably happy - battery going so am off to bed.

 

[Louise7]

A red toilet seat definitely worked for Mum for a while so worth a try. I got one from B&Q but that was a while ago so I don't know if they are still stocking them. Good luck - hope it works for your husband.

 

[DeMartin]

If you don’t mind ruining your white seat a tester pot of red emulsion will do the job quickly and cheaply, see if it helps, then buy a proper red seat.

 

[canary]

Half the problem with bathrooms is that they are usually white.
PWDs have problems interpreting colours and patterns: they see a dark mat as a hole, they see patterns on the carpet as raised ridges and dips - and they are unable to see white things as they fade into the background. If you have a white toilet with white tiles behind then the PWD is not able to see the toilet. Red is a colour that gets out inbuilt attention - it is hardwired into us so stays there for a long time in dementia - so putting a red seat on the toilet draws their attention to it and having a raised seat means they dont feel like they are sitting down onto nothing
Eventually, of course, they wont remember what they have to do and then they lose the understanding of what is happening.

 

[Shedrech]

hi @Josoap
and welcome form me too
just to say that your husband is entitled to an assessment of his care needs by your Local Authority Adult Services and it would be worth asking for an OT to visit your home and suggest aids and adaptions to the home - dad had grab rails supplied and fitted at no charge
you might also ask about day care and respite - the sooner you get some support in place the better for the both of you
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/info/...ment_adaptations_and_improvements_to_the_home