• Expert Q&A: Rare dementias - Tues 3 March, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of rare dementias. It will be hosted by Nikki and Seb from Rare Dementia Support. If you have any questions about rare dementias, they will be here to answer them on Tuesday 3 March between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.



Registered User
Oct 8, 2006
East Midlands
Hi all, i don't know if anyone remember me but i posted a few weeks ago regarding problems possibly related to dementia my husband and i had noticed about by Grandma.. and my Grandad phoning me as he was struggling to cope mainly because my Grandma kept accusing him of stealing her money when she was actually wrapping it up and leaving it in hiding places and then forgetting about it. Anyway we finally managed to get a GP appt sorted after i had wrote a letter explaining everything to the GP. We went with them to the appointment and waitied in the waiting room (my gran was under the impressions it was regular routine check-up) The GP really cheesed me off because my Grandad came out and said the GP had mentioned i had written to him WHY!:mad: i specifically stated in the letter it was not to be mentioned in front of my Gran... luckilly she didn't hear him, my Grandad knew anyway.
However the GP advised some blood tests and a ECG. Are these normally standard tests before making any diagnosis? And mentioned 'Memory clinic'
Any ideas??

Another problem we have at the moment is that (i hate saying this :( ) the house is smelly especially the bathroom and toilet and the pots are not washed properly... i know that sounds awful we have arranged to go round tomorrow to give things a good clean..My grandad assures me he can cope with the cleaning but i don't agree but i can't say that can i ?? He lets my Gran do the washing up but there's food still left on the plates etc
The toilet is really bad. But my Grandad doesn't seem aware?? I don't understand why??
I am adamant for them to stay together for as long as possible and will do anything i can to help. What i could do with is some advice on approaching the cleaning situation?? They have had a lady in before when my Gran first came out of hospital who did some cleaning etc but my Grandad said he could cope alone.... clearly he can't.. I would really appreciate some advice. Thanks:)


Registered User
Sep 7, 2007
When i noticed my Mum's memory problems i talked her into going to see the doctor and he went down the road at first to have blood test, as sometimes a vitamim deficiency can cause confusion. After my Mum had hers it showed that she had a B12 problem of which she was put medication for, it didn't help so finally had to go back and he then said that he could send her to a memory clinic for assessment. Once you go for it, you and the patient are asked a number of quetions both together and on your own. My mum did not score very well at all and then we had to put her forward for a CT scan on her brain.

The second question you asked is a tough one and because i never had to really deal with that one will leave that for someone else to answer.

Good luck and best wishes to you.



Registered User
Sep 29, 2007
Hi, there are numerous tests to do before a diagnosis can be made. It's basically a process of elimination and can take a very long time. My Mam has seen a psychiatrist, the crisis mental health team, a neurologist, psychiatric nurse, psychologist ........................ Still no diagnosis! Also she's had a CT scan and MRI. So in answer to your first question, yes it's quite normal.

I too found it difficult to broach the subject of hygeine etc with my parents. My mam lives with me now but I have to re wash everything she 'washes' and am constantly disinfecting the toilet, taps, door handle etc ................

Your grand parents need to be assessed by SS who will be able to provide some help hopefully. If you clean it all for them, you will be back to square one within a week. You need long term strategies. I always find it's best to put requests in writing so that people can't just ignore you! Good luck!


Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
I don't know how old your grandparents are, but it is quite possible that their sense of smell is not what it was. In other words they may have no idea that there is an odour.

Blood tests and EEG seems a reasonable first step to rule out other things that may be treatable. The "memory clinic" thoretically would be the place that would run or propose other more specific tests, and provide a level of support. I say theoretically, becasue these can be variable.


Registered User
Oct 8, 2006
East Midlands
Thanks all for the replies:)
The house hygiene has deterioated a lot and my Grandad basically doesn't want strangers coming in cleaning a he is still sure he can do it. He can hoover etc but when it comes to other things he can't. He is full time carer for my Gran and i don't know what else to do. Would it be advisable to actually show him what we mean by showing him the problem areas?
Last time we went round there was no way i would eat off a plate, its that bad. I coudn't wait to get washing up. I feel awful saying things like this but it really can't go on and my Grandad thinks he can cope and refuses outside help.
We also got a tea-towel out the drawer which was supposed to be clean and it smelt really bad.

Ethel Joan

Registered User
Oct 14, 2007
I have a similar problem at the moment with Inlaws, MIL gets upset if she sees someone else doing what she thinks that she has already done or thinks she is still capable of doing. The way sister in law and I get round it is arrange for FIL to take MIL out for a couple of hours, we go in when they have left, change bed clean bathroom etc, leave before they return, she doesn't know we have been and it saves the upset. Perhaps you could arrange something similar, even if you can only be in there half an hour you will be surprised how quick you can clean the loo!!



Registered User
Jul 6, 2007
leigh lancashire
Dear Xena,you had the same diagnosis as we did with dad,pernicious aenemia.we noticed no improvement and i wrote to his G.P.He has now seen the consultant and is taking Reminyl.Big improvement.Push as hard as you can for treatment.love elainex