Positive experiences of moving parents in with you?

Fantine

New member
Dec 28, 2018
6
0
I have read a number of posts recommending people think twice about moving in with an Alzheimer’s sufferer and was wondering whether anyone had any positive experiences? My mum has had the disease for at least 5 years and it seems to be progressing quite slowly. Her main problems are with short term memory and planning / organisation - she particularly struggles with mealtimes. On the other hand she’s exceptionally physically fit for her age (82), is active and still does Sudoku! Dad’s also in good health. We are looking at buying a property near where they live with an attached cottage so we are on hand to help, as both my sister and I live 250 miles away. I know there will come a time when she will deteriorate and we’ll have to look at care homes, but I feel we are a little way off that. The move works for us financially and we have no real ties to the area where we’re currently living - plus the place we want to buy is fabulous! Guess I’m just looking for something to balance out all the advice that says ‘don’t do it’
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,152
0
Surrey
I did it for two years;
I have read a number of posts recommending people think twice about moving in with an Alzheimer’s sufferer and was wondering whether anyone had any positive experiences? My mum has had the disease for at least 5 years and it seems to be progressing quite slowly. Her main problems are with short term memory and planning / organisation - she particularly struggles with mealtimes. On the other hand she’s exceptionally physically fit for her age (82), is active and still does Sudoku! Dad’s also in good health. We are looking at buying a property near where they live with an attached cottage so we are on hand to help, as both my sister and I live 250 miles away. I know there will come a time when she will deteriorate and we’ll have to look at care homes, but I feel we are a little way off that. The move works for us financially and we have no real ties to the area where we’re currently living - plus the place we want to buy is fabulous! Guess I’m just looking for something to balance out all the advice that says ‘don’t do it’
Mum is now in a care home but we rented together. She was mid stage but not that mobile. I did everything for her and it was knackering……but I dont regret it at all. I am so pleased to have done it for her and now have special memories of our time together.

I was able to keep working 3 days per week but had zilch social life. Not sleeping as helping her for the loo at night was tiring.

The set up also meant as soon as it became non viable we could give up the rental and I could move back to my place. I will have lost out on pension, earnings and career prospects but I chose that ….and will no doubt have saved some inheritance as she would jave been in care for longer otherwise.

perhaps have a week or two together to trial it first?
 

Staff online

Forum statistics

Threads
138,708
Messages
1,998,997
Members
90,480
Latest member
Nattycatnewforest