1. Expert Q&A: Living well as a carer - Thurs 29 August, 3-4pm

    As a carer for a person living with dementia, the needs of the person you care for will often come before your own. You may experience a range of difficult emotions and you may not have the time to do all the things you need to do. Caring can have a big impact on both your mental and physical health, as well as your overall wellbeing.

    Angelo, our Knowledge Officer (Wellbeing) is our expert on this topic. He will be here to answer your questions on Thursday 29 August between 3-4pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

Please keep me and my Family in your thoughts

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Beannie, Feb 21, 2018.

  1. Beannie

    Beannie Registered User

    Aug 17, 2015
    East Midlands
    After nearly 8 years battling Alzheimers Dementia and Parkinsons Disease my OH is now nearing the end of his life at the age of only 64. He is receiving End of Life Care at his Nursing Home after being transferred back there from hospital. Two weeks ago he was suddenly taken seriously ill and taken to hospital and was diagnosed with a serious UTI, Pneumonia, sepsis and then finally the serious strain of flu!! Unfortunately his already compromised immune system couldn't cope and myself and our daughter as his Power of Attorney's and the Doctors made the decision on Monday to withdraw the antibiotics and fluid drip and allow him to die peacefully.

    It has been a roller coaster ride for us particularly in the last 5 months and if you have seen my previous posts we were in fact due to have a meeting last Thursday with the CHC, Social Worker, My Attorney and the Nursing Home Manager as his behaviour had deteriorated to such a point that it was felt he needed to be moved to a Mental Health Unit. This latest development will mean there will be no need for the meeting or for my OH to have to be moved again.

    Talking Point has been a Godsend for me as it has allowed me to rant and rave, get valuable information and at times offer support to others. I would urge everyone to have a Power of Attorney for Health and Wealth to cover situations like mine. The Doctors had to consult with me and ask my opinion as my OH was unable to speak for himself and because we had had 'The Conversation' I knew exactly what I had to do. However I never imagined it would be like this. Again many thanks to my fellow Talking Pointers and continue to support each other.
  2. Normaleila

    Normaleila Registered User

    Jun 4, 2016
    Oh Beannie. This is so hard. We're holding your hand and wishing you all strength at this difficult time.
  3. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    I'm so sorry @Beannie . It's such a heartbreaking thing, having to actually make the decision to stop treatment and allow our loved ones to leave us. We will all be with you, as you keep your vigil, and wishing you strength and endurance.
  4. Linda G

    Linda G Registered User

    Oct 23, 2017
    My thoughts are with you.
  5. Heylowe

    Heylowe Registered User

    Mar 15, 2015
    Sending you a big hug. I'm so sorry & know, as a family, we aren't far from this situation. Be brave & know that you're doing incredibly well.
    You're right, this forum is amazing! So much support.
  6. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    just posting to add my sympathy and support
    may your OH go in peace
    be gentle with yourself Beannie
  7. Amethyst59

    Amethyst59 Registered User

    Jul 3, 2017
    I am thinking about you all too at this very sad and difficult time.
  8. Philbo

    Philbo Registered User

    Feb 28, 2017
    Thinking of you all.

    Kind regards
  9. Risa

    Risa Registered User

    Apr 13, 2015
    {{{Hugs}}} Thinking of you Beannie and your family during this difficult time.
  10. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    I doubt we can ever imagine the reality @Beannie . Sadly its something we can only endure.
  11. jaymor

    jaymor Volunteer Moderator

    Jul 14, 2006
    My thoughts are with you.
  12. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    I remember your other posts and you've had such a rough ride. No-one who hasn't dealt with this disease can possibly imagine the reality of it. I'm so sorry and hope you can all find some peace now.
  13. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    My thoughts are with you all.
  14. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    Such sadness. My good wishes to you all at this very hard time.
  15. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    I'm so sorry to read your sad news. A heartbreaking time for you all. Wishing you strength.
  16. PJ

    PJ Registered User

    Jan 26, 2017
    Sending lots of love & strength to you all. I can’t begin to imagine what you are going through.
  17. Mudgee Joy

    Mudgee Joy Registered User

    Dec 26, 2017
    New South Wales Australia
    Let me add my best wishes to the others above. Feel the care and love from us all and be kind to yourself x
  18. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
  19. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    My thoughts are with you, sending you and your family love and strength at this difficult time.
  20. love.dad.but..

    love.dad.but.. Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    I am thinking of you and during the coming days. I know from the same decision I made for Dad to stop iv fluids and antibiotics and take him back to his NH to end of life with familiar people and environment...It is a hard time for everyone. I hope your OH is kept comfortable and peaceful and that you manage to get some rest. And yes I tell everyone I see...poa health as well as finance is important just in case it is ever needed.

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