Out of sight out of mind!!

[Norrms]

Out Of
Sight
Out Of
Mind

“Out of sight Out of mind”

How many times do we hear that in our life and how many different scenario`s can it apply to? I can certainly think of one especially when the word “Dementia” is mentioned in some circles. But this is my personal take on it and is something that happened the other day.

My own “Out of sight, out of mind feeling took on a brand new meaning to me as I went out with (my Angel) Elaine for some lunch.

If you recall a few days ago it was an absolute washout regarding the weather and torrential rain was coming down in Torquay. We have been the “Staying in” kind so Elaine decided we should treat ourselves to some lunch at a nearby pub. As we arrived there was hardly anywhere to park so Elaine dropped me off at the front and hunted for somewhere to park. This started a chain of events that were very worrying for me at the time and a completely new experience for me.

I stood inside the foyer for what seemed like an age and I become more and more aware of people looking at me, or so i thought? I have never been paranoid and always say that people have to find me as I am, but this was different. As I scanned the outside for Elaine I saw her face smiling at me and she was waving to me. I was so relieved but tried not to show it but without much success. We found a table, ordered our lunch and had a small intimate chat about how I was feeling.
The lunch was lovely and it was onward and upward to M+S to have a look at the new upstairs they have just built. But that wasn’t the end of it. Elaine once again dropped me off whilst she parked, at my insistence I might add, and there I stood. Within minutes self doubt started to creep into my mind and as time went on I stated to physically panic. The thoughts flying around in my head were of

“How did I get here? “ Did I imagine Elaine bringing me here?” “Where am I?” and Am I dreaming all this as Elaine is not here I must be!!

I stood rooted to the spot not even moving for people who were trying to get past which must have seemed very unusual to say the least. Time seemed to tick away so so slowly and almost stood still in my mind. I could feel a scream welling up inside me of sheer panic and lack of understanding, not only of the feeling of loneliness and helplessness but of realising that this was yet another stage of this awful terrible disease trying to drag me down into its depths of despair.

Just then as I looked up I saw Elaine hurrying through the door at some speed, somehow realising my plight from afar and taking a hold of my arm and giving me a great big hug. I didn’t know whether to laugh, cry or just shout out at the sheer relief I felt at that moment and we must have looked like two lovers who had not seen each other for a long time. But I didn’t care, Elaine was there, I hadn’t imagined it all and I knew then, all would be ok.

All this happened just because there was nowhere to park because of the weather, it was nobody`s fault, but it just shows you how something so seemingly innocent can affect the thinking of someone like me who has Dementia.
Is this disease “Out Of Sight out of Mind” for some people? Do they deny the existence of dementia and just put it down to old age?
Try walking in my shoes for a while!!

To all those affected by this terrible disease you will know only too well the way this disease destroys you and your loved ones bit by bit and painfully slowly and how it affects your lives on a day to day basis. Hopefully this will go some way to describing what it’s like and helps more people understand this God awful disease
.
Best wishes, Norrms and family xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[miss cool]

HI norms, well wate can i say, nothing at all you have said it all. if ther are stages you go thrue i must be with you i couldent of put it just rite. are you in my head???????????????

love miss cool. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Contrary Mary]

Dear Norrms

I do hope that those horrible moments did not spoil your day out too much.

Thank you, however, for another of your wonderfully descriptive insights into dementia. The thought that crossed my mind was might it help someone applying for a Taxicard when a dementia sufferer is not regarded as "disabled".

Best wishes to you and Elaine
Mary
x

PS I meant Blue Badge (for parking) not Taxicard. Not thinking straight today!

 

[creativesarah]

Poor you Norms how frightening hope you have a better day today
Sarah

 

[carrie99]

Supermarket confusion!

That'll teach me. I parked the car in a space at Morrisons where I don't normally park. Confusion followed until I found it.
Perhaps I should stick something brght in the car. Why are they all silver now? (including mine).
At least I have 'passed' my annual driving assessment.

Carrie

 

[Sundance]

Hi Norms
I hope your experience did not spoil your day out to much with your lovely wife.
As for confusion in car parks I have been caught trying to get into someone elses car, well it looked like mine...same make, same model, same colour and only one number and one letter away from being my number plate the only real thing that should have told me it was not my car was not being able to put the key in the door lock, so glad the owner of the car came back when they did or I could have ended up paying for a new window. x

 

[Libby]

Hi Norms

You have such a way of describing things - things that the majority of people don't think twice about.

As for people denying the existence of Dementia!? - I think it's a lack of education - unless you actually know someone who has dementia, then it's very hard to understand how someones life is changed. I know that just by talking to people at work about Mum.

Glad to hear that it didn't spoil you lunch though

Liz

 

[Norrms]

Thank you

Thank you all so much, it also helps me immensley to share my feelings with you all, best wishes, Norrms and family xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[sad nell]

Thanks yet again Norrms for letting me see what my dear Trev was suffering without me realising, wish i had known at the time, many difficult situations make so much sensce when you tell it from your side, so gratful for you sharing your experiences with AD, more valuable than you will ever know. love to you and Elainelxx

 

[Charizomai]

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. It helps me to understand a bit of my mom's feelings better. Blessings to you.

 

[Feezee]

Supermarket confusion

Carrie99,
My dad used to keep a bright red lightshade on the back shelf of his car. It was there for about 3 years. He couldn't remember the make and model (or registration number) of his car but it was his way of identifying it when he couldn't remember where it was parked.

One day I suggested moving it and he explained why he didn't want to. Maybe something like that might help?

Feezee