My mother has just been diagnosed with dementia after 18 months of extremely difficult behaviour, she lives with me.
She is constantly aggressive and combative. She is always accusing me of going into her room and taking her things. I’ve taken her TV, Jewellery, clothes, pillows, glasses, the list goes on! She also accuses me of putting things in her room which don’t belong to her.
Every morning I wake up and I’m afraid to leave my bedroom because I know it’s going to start. I have this sick sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach and I feel like I’m constantly fighting back the tears. I haven’t eaten anything other than breakfast for the last week because I feel physically sick, I only eat breakfast because I have medication to take that can only be taken with food.
She has been prescribed lorazepam twice a day which seems to keep her a little bit calmer but the aggression is always just under the surface. I have two autoimmune diseases which are exasperated by stress and make it extremely difficult for me to be constantly up and down because one of my symptoms is extreme fatigue. She literally doesn’t give me a moments peace and I feel so ill all the time.
This morning when I went into her room to give her a tablet as soon as I opened the door I knew I was going to get it! She gets this twisted look on her face that tells you straight away she’s about to explode. It’s like something out of a Hitchcock movie! She said I’d taken her hairdryer and left a s***** one on her bed. (Yes her language can be disgusting) She said I came in during the night and took hers, she was absolutely raging, I thought she was going to hit me with the hairdryer. When I gave her the tablet she hid it in her hand and pretended to take it. How can someone with advanced dementia be capable of deception? I could understand if she refused to take the tablet but I’m astounded she has the cognitive ability to pretend to take a tablet!
Half hour after this episode she came into my room and apologised for shouting. I know she’s only doing that because she’s terrified I will call a Doctor and she will get sectioned. Again these are the actions of someone who is calculating and deceptive and I really don’t understand it. It also doesn’t stop it from happening over and over again throughout the day and night.
I literally can’t take much more of this the only thing that prevents me from having her sectioned are these moments of clarity and awareness.
Please don’t judge me I’ve spent the last 20 years helping to care for my father who also has dementia and is now in a nursing home. He was extremely violent and was eventually sectioned.
I really don’t feel like I’ve had any quality of life and it’s been hard on my hubby who is a saint! I am also so sick now that I feel the best years are behind me, I really just want this to end!
Any advice would be appreciated I’m at breaking point I feel so sick
She is constantly aggressive and combative. She is always accusing me of going into her room and taking her things. I’ve taken her TV, Jewellery, clothes, pillows, glasses, the list goes on! She also accuses me of putting things in her room which don’t belong to her.
Every morning I wake up and I’m afraid to leave my bedroom because I know it’s going to start. I have this sick sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach and I feel like I’m constantly fighting back the tears. I haven’t eaten anything other than breakfast for the last week because I feel physically sick, I only eat breakfast because I have medication to take that can only be taken with food.
She has been prescribed lorazepam twice a day which seems to keep her a little bit calmer but the aggression is always just under the surface. I have two autoimmune diseases which are exasperated by stress and make it extremely difficult for me to be constantly up and down because one of my symptoms is extreme fatigue. She literally doesn’t give me a moments peace and I feel so ill all the time.
This morning when I went into her room to give her a tablet as soon as I opened the door I knew I was going to get it! She gets this twisted look on her face that tells you straight away she’s about to explode. It’s like something out of a Hitchcock movie! She said I’d taken her hairdryer and left a s***** one on her bed. (Yes her language can be disgusting) She said I came in during the night and took hers, she was absolutely raging, I thought she was going to hit me with the hairdryer. When I gave her the tablet she hid it in her hand and pretended to take it. How can someone with advanced dementia be capable of deception? I could understand if she refused to take the tablet but I’m astounded she has the cognitive ability to pretend to take a tablet!
Half hour after this episode she came into my room and apologised for shouting. I know she’s only doing that because she’s terrified I will call a Doctor and she will get sectioned. Again these are the actions of someone who is calculating and deceptive and I really don’t understand it. It also doesn’t stop it from happening over and over again throughout the day and night.
I literally can’t take much more of this the only thing that prevents me from having her sectioned are these moments of clarity and awareness.
Please don’t judge me I’ve spent the last 20 years helping to care for my father who also has dementia and is now in a nursing home. He was extremely violent and was eventually sectioned.
I really don’t feel like I’ve had any quality of life and it’s been hard on my hubby who is a saint! I am also so sick now that I feel the best years are behind me, I really just want this to end!
Any advice would be appreciated I’m at breaking point I feel so sick
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