Nursing Home Worries

[amme92]

My mother, who will be 70 this year, has been in a nursing home for nearly 6 months now and she has been bed bound for all this time. I'm feeling really stressed and upset that I am letting her down. She was hospitalised with a bad urine infection in May and she has been bed bound since then.

A private physio went to see her a few months ago and the home told as mum is unable to retain information and follow instructions, so physio will not help her. She needs help with feeding and drinking now as she cannot use cutlery and the decline is really painful to see. She is in bed all day, and has been since day one, and is unable to socalise with other residents downstairs and I worry that she is just being left alone. When I visit her, she is very quiet and I often have to keep asking her the same things until I get a reponse.

I don't know if I am pressing the home enough and if they can do more to encourage her or if this is normal? When I speak with people about this, they feel the home should be doing more but I don't know what else I can do as I have discussed things with the home on several occasions. I don't know if I should looking to move my mother to another nursing home but am worried it will be traumatic, especially given her mobility state. Any advice would be greatly appreciated

 

[try again]

In my mother's home a lot of the immobile are taken into the lounge each day. I expect there are some that are too poorly but of course I don't see them.
Some of those in the lounge don't speak.
You need to speak to the manager and ask the question.

 

[Sarasa]

Welcome to Dementia Support Forum @amme92. I'm so sorry to hear about your mum and at a comparatively young age too.
My mother, who was much older than your mum was often in bed when I visited. When I questioned the care home they said that she was upset in the lounge, but I kept on asking and in the end they did make sure she spent at least a little of each day in there.
I think you need to talk to the manager, and maybe the home's GP. It does sound like your mother's dementia is quite advanced so maybe staying in bed is more comfortable for her.