Nursing home - Lost stuff

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by smartieplum, Jun 25, 2018.

  1. smartieplum

    smartieplum Registered User

    Jul 29, 2014
    Mum's nursing home is very good but, as you know, the residents go in and out of each other's rooms lifting and laying stuff. I had given mum a wee photo album with lots of family photos which has been missing a while now. I've reported it several times. It was tagged with her name and each photo was marked. How can something like that go missing?? I'm so annoyed about it. I'm just really wanting to vent. Any suggestions on what to do next?? I wish id taken copies but at the time things were so hectic.
  2. lemonjuice

    lemonjuice Registered User

    Jun 15, 2016
    Don't beat yourself up about it. It's all too easy at the start not to realise how much stuff gets lost. My mother's NH lost two rings. Irreplaceable. But I learnt my lesson and just replaced them with costume jewellery.

    Keep reminding the Home d make sure you write a letter requesting them what the y intend to do about finding the photos/book as that is more likely to get a response.
  3. Hazara8

    Hazara8 Registered User

    Apr 6, 2015

    This is a constant feature of dementia in some residents, but not all. 'Shopping' or simply taking things which do not belong to them and often secreting them. It is often advised to think carefully about anything of intrinsic value being left with a loved one, simply due to that risk factor. You will find all manner of personal items left or simply forgotten by the one who has taken them. Blame cannot be put on anyone in particular, as it is the dementia which is the causation. Understanding that enables caution and awareness of the situation. My late mother had her glasses taken and broken more than once. Her slippers taken and worn on a regular basis. As to how things vanish. I have found items stuffed inside a cushion, on top of wardrobes and hidden in the most obscure places.. It would be prudent to have copies of any precious snapshots. I had my mother's name glued into an item, which was subsequently ripped out by a female resident, who must have possessed uncanny strength!
  4. Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    Unfortunately dad was one who moved not only his things and left them around his NH but also wandered into other residents rooms and picked the odd thing up. It wasn't a conscious taking of other peoples stuff just that he had lost any concept of ownership of possessions and probably seeing other rooms as being part of his 'home'. I always checked his room and returned to the carers anything that wasn't his and felt terrible that dad and others also did this but they couldn't help it...doesnt make it right I know. However if residents don't have regular visitors they may not notice something else has appeared.

    Dad would often put things in his drawers etc or if he picked something up and then visited another room or communal atea would squirrel it somewhere. Ask the NH to do a deep search of all the rooms and communal areas...wardrobes...drawers...shelves..behind things...I requested a deep search be carried out ...29 bedrooms...through the NH manager when dad had misplaced his Missal that he always carried...I knew it would turn up but a detailed search was needed. It was found at the bottom of another resident's wardrobe.
  5. smartieplum

    smartieplum Registered User

    Jul 29, 2014
    Thanks. Think I'll put it in writing.
  6. yak55

    yak55 Registered User

    Jun 15, 2015
    I've swopped all of mums prescious jewellery items for costume, in fact I recently purchased some beautiful pearl earrings
    , five pairs in total, all the same so if one or two or three get lost I have replacements and they were only 99p a pair from eBay plus free postage

    Mum will be going into a care home this week and after past dealings in respite care I now know not to let mum have anything irreplaceable in her room, it is a shame but that's just the nature of the disease sadly x
  7. doodle1

    doodle1 Registered User

    May 11, 2012
    My mums room is locked when she is not in it. Could you not ask that this be done? The key is kept at the top of the door where the carers and I can reach it but not the residents. Worth a try?
  8. smartieplum

    smartieplum Registered User

    Jul 29, 2014
    This used to be done but care commission said it interferes with the residents ability to come and go. It's a dementia unit! Her glasses, remote control, framed photos have also walked. Today, she wandered into someone else's room and a wardrobe fell on her!! She was not injured but it's a worry.
  9. Elle3

    Elle3 Registered User

    Jun 30, 2016
    I’m afraid my dad is one of worst for hiding things and visiting other residents rooms. We are constantly looking for things of his which he’s hidden or we are giving back items he’s taken that don’t belong to him, usually slippers and shoes, although in his defence most of the male residents slippers do look the same. I found him with some sun glasses the other day which weren’t his and he’s always pocketing the nursing homes cutlery and he’s even tried to hide a bowl up his jumper.

    All the rooms in dad’s nursing unit are left open, but there is a sensor mat that triggers when someone goes in, so staff can normally intercept any rogue residents before they get up to anything.

    I’ve found when we stop looking for things, they usually just turn up.

    I hope you find the album.

    Elle x
  10. Sirena

    Sirena Registered User

    Feb 27, 2018
    The bedrooms in my mother's CH are all locked when the resident is not in there, so their room stays as it was when they left it. Almost all the residents come down to spend the day in the lounges, and when they want to return to their room they are helped by a carer, many are frail so shouldn't/can't use the stairs/lift on their own. I have a key to her room so I can pop in and check everything is in order, and it's always fine. My mother doesn't have anything 'valuable' except her photos, and it would be upsetting if those went missing.

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