Newbie and possibly shouldn't be here.

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by Kate48, Jun 28, 2008.

  1. Kate48

    Kate48 Registered User

    Jun 28, 2008
    2
    London
    Hi, I am not even sure I should be taking up space in here as my husband hasn't been dianosed yet.
    He has 90% of the symtoms of Vascular Dementia and his cardiac nurse thinks this could be the problem.
    I have given up on the social workers as they just mislead and give no help at all.
    I read some of the threads and replies in here and have had a glimpse into what the future may hold. I thought it was bad enough now but it looks as if it only gets worse.
    Please tell me if I am not really eligible to be in here yet.
    I would be loathe to cause any upset.
     
  2. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Hi Kate, welcome to TP.

    Of course you have a right to be here, as far as I know there are no entry requirements.

    Just post any questions you have, there's usually someone around to advise and support.

    In the meantime, have you seen the AS factsheet on VAD? It may give you some pointers.

    http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/factsheet/402

    All the best,
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,597
    Kent
    #3 Grannie G, Jun 28, 2008
    Last edited: Jun 28, 2008
    Hello Kate

    You have every right to be here.

    Although this is the Forum for the Alzheimer`s Society on-line community, it is for all carers and sufferers of all forms of dementia.

    Unfortunately, if your husband is diagnosed with any form of dementia, I`m afraid there is only one way for it to go, and it will get worse. There may be drugs to help relieve his symptoms and you will be able to find out about those when you see the consultant.

    I hope you will continue to post on TP, share your experiences and fears, and be well supported by all of us who are in similar shoes.

    Love xx
     
  4. jude1950

    jude1950 Registered User

    Mar 23, 2006
    182
    Lincolnshire
    Hi kate,

    I posted on here before my Husbands diagnosis and was made very welcome. Unfortunately our worst fears were realised and Alzheimers Disease was the diagnosis. Like you I had done some research and thought that my husband had Vascular dementia ...no two cases are the same and there is the possibility that he has mixed dementia . Please keep posting and let us know how you get on with the Consultant.
    regards

    Judith
     
  5. Kate48

    Kate48 Registered User

    Jun 28, 2008
    2
    London
    Thank you Hazel, Sylvia and Judith for your very warm welcome.

    I told my husband that if he does in fact have Vascular Dementia then the quicker the dianosis, the more help they can give but if he left it then in a year or so it would be too late and he would be far,far worse.
    Seems he will be far, far worse whatever happens.
    The future is scaring me for the first time ever. I am not coping now, I know that I will not cope if it gets worse and I do not want to deal with social workers ever again.
    I was misled and blatently lied to.
    My husband's cardiac nurse first contacted them about the problems we were having in sept 07, again in feb this year and again in may - they finally made contact a few weeks ago after I told the cardiac nurse the whole truth with no holds barred.
    My only solace is my animals and I get great joy from taking them out for walks but today I couldn't even manage that, I am too tired.
    Yet I read some of the posts on here and wonder how do they do it? they are coping with far more than I am yet they soldier on.
    Perhaps they can give me the secret.
    Thank you again for letting me waffle.
    Kate
     
  6. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Kate, I don't think any of us would deny being scared. It's a long, hard journey, but you will cope, because you love your husband, and because there really is no alternative.

    Many of us have had trouble and been upset by social workers, but you are going to need their support if you are going to have any respite -- unless you have lots of money and can finance your own support.

    I'd like to suggest you contact your local branch of Alzheimer's Society and Princess Royal Trust for Carers. Both of them will arrange for someone to help you, and talk through your fears. Both will probably have support groups that you can attend, with or without your husband.

    The impostant thing is to try not to panic. We're all struggling, but we support each other.:)

    Love,
     

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