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[PookaB]

Hello, l thought l would sign up on here as we continue the long dementia journey which is slowly destroying my husband bit by bit and me too in many ways emotionally plus brings great sadness and stress to my daughter who lives with me.
My husband was 60 yrs old in 2019 retired in the July and diagnosed with this horrible disease of Altzhiemers in the October. In 2021 he had a massive seizure and after that he barely knew us and was unable to talk. He has Logopenia Altzhiemers which affects speaking and processing etc.
He is advanced in the illness and requires intensive nursing care in all aspects. The care he gets is very good and atm he gets the Continued NHS Care.
Most of the time we cope well but some of the visits we do he will get aggressive and few days ago he kicked our beautiful border collie in the face plus a resident too. Obviously l know my dear husband would be horrified to know he did this and that its the condition not him but still its been so upsetting. Dementia shows no compassion.

 

[Jwashcott]

Hello, l thought l would sign up on here as we continue the long dementia journey which is slowly destroying my husband bit by bit and me too in many ways emotionally plus brings great sadness and stress to my daughter who lives with me.
My husband was 60 yrs old in 2019 retired in the July and diagnosed with this horrible disease of Altzhiemers in the October. In 2021 he had a massive seizure and after that he barely knew us and was unable to talk. He has Logopenia Altzhiemers which affects speaking and processing etc.
He is advanced in the illness and requires intensive nursing care in all aspects. The care he gets is very good and atm he gets the Continued NHS Care.
Most of the time we cope well but some of the visits we do he will get aggressive and few days ago he kicked our beautiful border collie in the face plus a resident too. Obviously l know my dear husband would be horrified to know he did this and that its the condition not him but still its been so upsetting. Dementia shows no compassion.

 

[Jwashcott]

Thank you for writing your post, i joined only mins ago, we, re not alone are we. Knowing that the bad behaviour isnt our loved ones s its the diease, is confirmed to me. Its sad..

 

[PookaB]

Thank you for your message and you are correct we are not alone on this website . I am wondering if l should set up a support / friendship group in the Nursing Home with the relatives as l can't be the only one who drives home in tears.

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome to the forum @PookaB and @Jwashcott I hope you will both find it helpful and supporting.

I am wondering if l should set up a support / friendship group in the Nursing Home with the relatives as l can't be the only one who drives home in tears.

I think this is a wonderful idea. There is nothing better than peer support. It is available here but could be so much better face to face.

Even though we know challenging behaiour is usually caused by fear and frustration, it doesn`t make it any easier to manage.

The calmer the atmosphere we can provide will be the better and as few expectations as possible might help.

Avoid niosy or crowded situations and asking the person with dementia to do what may be too complicated for them.

 

[northumbrian_k]

Hi @PookaB welcome to Dementia Support Forum our friendly and helpful community of people who have experience of many aspects of dementia. This is a great place to ask questions,learn from the experience of others and share with people who truly understand. I am sure that you'll benefit from the help you find here.