need support

fatty

Registered User
Feb 12, 2007
1
0
St. Neots, Cambs
Hi everyone, I am new to TP but hope to make some new friends through it. My mum has been in a care home for about 17 months suffering from Alzheimers. She has not found it easy but has never talked about her problems. I wont bore you with all the events since she has been there, but the most recent problem to have arisen is at her bathtime. I was informed recently by one of the staff that it took 3 of them to handle mum at bathtime, which is only once a week, and she doesnt always agree to it. Evidently she screamed so loud other residents were covering their ears! I offered to go along and 'assist' which I did last night. As they said, mum screamed so loud at the top of her voice - not that there was anything wrong - nice bubbly bath, warm room etc. I tried consoling her but she just screamed and clenched her fists and banged them on the side of the bath. She glared at me and shouted that if I didn't get her out she would punch me in the face. I must point out that at no time was she forced to do anything and the staff are so calm. This reaction really upset me and no amount of explanation or reassurance would pacify mum. Have any other members experienced similar problems and if so can you give us some advice on what to do next! Mum is as bad with showers evidently. Sorry to ramble on but I am so upset by this latest outburst. Lindy Lou
 

Brucie

Registered User
Jan 31, 2004
12,413
0
near London
Hi Lindy Lou

welcome to Talking Point.

There are so many things that appear to be alarming, but that, over time, we [have to] get used to.

I know of residents in my wife's home who scream alarmingly at the slightest interaction, let alone being bathed.

My wife's care plan has a minimum of two care assistants needed to move her - even to adjust her position in her chair. This is to limit any possible damage either to her, or to the assistants.

All credit to you, going along to assist and observe!

Reactions by people with dementia are not always in direct relation to what is going on - and they don't always mean what they appear to mean.

I reckon if I were in a position like your Mum or my wife, I'd be pretty vociferous - having 'strangers' not only present during personal care, but also laying hands on and seeing you.... must be dreadful for a private person.

If all looked ok and the bath etc looked inviting, then you may simply have to accept that this is how it is.

Have you spoken to the home manager about it?
 

Helen33

Registered User
Jul 20, 2008
14,697
0
Hello Lindy Lou

Welcome to Talking Point and I hope that you find it helpful and supportive.

I thought you might be interested to read a thread started by Sumosumo which is about bathing. If you go to the bottom green line above and press search. Then type in Bathing and click on threads. A list of threads will appear and if you click on the one called "bath needed" by Sumosumo there you will be able to read all the responses.

Love and best wishes
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
0
london
I offered to go along and 'assist' which I did last night. As they said, mum screamed so loud at the top of her voice - not that there was anything wrong - nice bubbly bath, warm room etc. I tried consoling her but she just screamed and clenched her fists and banged them on the side of the bath.

My mother also is very vocal , would scream the place down

A really good book to get is . Learning to Speak Alzheimer's . It has a few pages on it .


The patient may perceive the bath or shower as a first – time ordeal every time. S/he simply may not remember the expectations every time.

Removing clothing – or having it removed – can increase feeling of loss of control. The inability to articulate those feeling can raise the patient anxiety.

The sound of running water may induce fear in someone with a failing auditory perception .Impaired perception of colour, depth and contrast may keep the patents from seeing clear water. Adding a blue or blue- green colouring agent to the tub helps make the water visible.

The feeling of water suddenly, splashed on the face can cause fear. If possible, wash patents face and hands separately, not in the shower. Shampooing can cause anxiety, so shampoo only when you must do so, and use dry shampoo whenever possible.
The odour of an unfamiliar kind of soap may induce fear.



That is from an extract from the book Learning to Speak Alzheimer's.



I never tried the coloring in the water , because back in that stage, mum was also finding it very hard to get in out of bath, so I stop using the bath , then I got that book , will I got every book out that was to do with Alzheimer's , to try to understand what was going on . Then I found TP :)
 
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Norman

Registered User
Oct 9, 2003
4,348
0
Birmingham Hades
Seems to me that sceaming is a common thing with dementia patients.
My wife would scream if any attempt was made to move her in the shower or to move her in bed.
Also if she had nothing to hold onto when out side.
It seemed that she screamed when she had too do do something that she did not want to do.
I think the real reason was the fear of falling also not understanding what was being done for her.
Norman
 

salacious

Registered User
May 25, 2008
62
0
west midlands
dont worry

hi there lindy lou, great name!
i really wouldnt worry about this being unusual, it can be quite common for people with alzheimers to be irate sometimes, i always think it is something to do with frustration, my mom went through it for quite a time, about 5 months, although it varies with different people. my mom used to hate getting dressed, she would scream and punch me too, but you just stick it out and eventually she accepted these things and calmed down. dont worry your head so much about it, this will only make the experience for yourself that much harder.

we are however here to help you with anything,

sara

oh and by the way, on this site there is no such thing as rambling on! its why were here for eachother x:D