Nasty Habits!

[bucko]

Nasty Habits

Oh, how I can relate to some of these habits you mention. I can honestly say it is the illness that has brought these habits into the open and I find them so difficult to cope with. I try to use some of my own ideas to try and avoid these problems, like showering with my hubby (to make sure he showers daily); to put a disposable bed pad, which is like a paper mat, down in front of the toilet which is absorbing the wee and giving him baby wet wipes to wipe underneath. Obviously if I were not to do all these things, I am sure my darling would be living like a hobo, never paying any attention to personal hygiene at all. All these tasks do take there toll on you as a carer, but sometimes it avoids only more hasle. Margaret, you did make me smile. How often I would like to do what you suggest, but thank God I stop myself! I just scream and shout and then cry ... this is my outlet, but boy do I feel guilty when I do this.

I'm not sure if you will find this funny, but I did. John trying to empty the wee out of his pull ups ... when I asked what he was doing with his soiled pull ups (as he was leaning over the loo tipping them) he said, emptying the wee, so they will be easier for you to carry .... erh!! This morning though, not funny, he placed the pull ups in the toilet pan when I wasn't looking.


June

 

[Maggiemay]

I buy my Mum Tena Ladies to use but she very often forgets to put them in her pants and has 'accidents' so she washes out her 'smalls' but only the gusset "well the rest don't get dirty" she says! On the days she does use her Tenas she wears the same pair of pants the next day

 

[suzywoozie]

The best thing about posting anything on here is that others tell their similar stories too, and it helps so, so much to know that you are not alone! Thank you so much everyone.

 

[Jo1958]

Sue, hi
It is very frustrating all these changes and how they affect us.

Hubby and I talked through the walking behind business and he explained that walking is now very exhausting and takes all his energy and effort and he has nothing left for directions and safety so he walks behind me and leaves me to do all the work that leaves him safe to walk happily and safely when we are out, he does feel guilty about putting all the responibility on me but he can't help it and there isn't an option for him. So we walk together, together just not always side by side, but always together. I watch out for anything that might cause a stumble or fall and pause to give him time to react, we hold hands on difficult parts of any journey, be it to put out the bin or refill the bird feeders as he is now scared of the spiders webs in the garden.

I hope that you can find some way of forgiving your dad for the things that so annoy you, there are many journeys with this disease and none of them are easy for anyone.
Take care of yourself, kind regards, Jo

 

[creativesarah]

my aunt lived in a CH and had few possessions but one was a leather waste paper basket which she decided to use as a toilet the ch did ask my cousin if he would like the basket back he said no!!!
she also startef hanging her used incontinance pads in the wardrobe to dry out

 

[Jackcat]

I need to grow eyes in the back of my head! Mum was walking behind me and the kids again yesterday, I turned round and she was climbing a tree! That made me smile as I helped her back down. But later we were crossing a busy road, I said go quicker Mum and she stopped stock still and refused to move! We had a tussle and nearly got run over, frightennd the wits out of me and the kids, and she just grumbled that I was treating her like a child.

 

[elaine n]

Jo what you posted about your husband was very interesting. Because gary won't discuss his AD I have very little insight to what he's feeling or how he perceives things so posts like this are very helpful. Thanks xx

 

[Onlyme]

The drink tipping took me back to my childhood when my parents would tip the dregs of tea into the hedges when we had a picnic. Could it be that Dads/Mum's are remembering when tea had slops?

 

[Loopiloo]

Oh how I recognize so many of these habits....

put a disposable bed pad, which is like a paper mat, down in front of the toilet which is absorbing the wee

June, my ears pricked up when I read this. My husband has been weeing or dribbling at the toilet for ages now, he up several times during the night. I've used plastic, old towels, to no avail, the floor is still wet and getting worse. I think it has penetrated beneath the edge of the flooring which is stained now, only two years old. That's with an old towel over the pedestal matt and plastic beneath it. I've given up saying anything as he furiously denies he is doing it. I just shut up, wipe up, wash up, chuck the matt and towel in the washing machine.

Where can you buy the disposable bed pads? Anywhere online?

Lately I see the floor sometimes has puddles from the door to the loo, he must be unzipping as he reaches the door.

Is this how incontinence begins? Occasionally he has soaked his trousers but again denies it! Then refuses to change them, says "They'll dry in a few minutes"!

Loo xx

 

[bucko]

Nasty Habits

Loopiloo, I got them from Boots, they are £2.99 and called Staydry and are disposable bed pads.

June x

 

[Loopiloo]

Loopiloo, I got them from Boots, they are £2.99 and called Staydry and are disposable bed pads.

June x

Thanks for that, June. Top of my shopping list now!

Loo xx

 

[bensoncat300]

This whole thread has had me in tears - I know none of it is funny at the time but it is so spooky how every one knows exactly how the other member is feeling. Its given me a warm fuzzy feeling (or is that the wine - no cant be its only Lambrini) just to know I am not alone

My Uncle wees on the seat every time he goes so I always go in after him armed with those antiseptic wipes - he must think its very odd that I have to go straight after him every time. He never washes his hands so I always go in the kitchen straight after that and shout "Tom - just come in here will you - so he potters in - just stick your hands in this bowl a minute - so he does - then I squirt washing up liquid on his hands and he has no choice but to wash it off. It works every time, its a good job he cant remember doing it the time before.

As for not changing clothes. I get my mum to have a strip wash every day but she only does little bits of her, so we have a shower together once a week so I know she has done all her "bits" Every time she says "I do have a good wash every day you know" but I always get round it by saying we have our hair washed in the shower dont we - that makes all your lovely curls come back"

She always throws her tea dregs outside for the birds (?) lucky birds!

She whispers to herself a lot too - to remember where she is going and what she is going to do next I think.

God bless you all for sharing all this.

 

[scarletpauline]

I have just reread the whole thread too and if everyone is the same as me, it has helped just to realise that we are all in the same boat, it has made me more patient and understanding with Jack although sometimes he is like a really old man (he is 78) I know it's the disease so can be patient with him. Hope all the other posters feel the same. Pauline xx

 

[bensoncat300]

I certainly do Pauline, before I found TP I was at my wits end - none of the professionals seemed to be able to give me any advice that helped. I started crying a lot and thought I was going to make myself ill caring for my mum and Uncle, but since finding this site - just knowing that there are hundreds of others out there going through the same thing, its incredible how much better I feel. I am very calm and have loads of patience and havent had tears for ages. I am a much stronger person for just coming on here and reading everyones stories, it has helped me no end, more than any of the so called experts have, so I for one just want to thank EVERYONE on here, even though I have only posted a few things - just knowing everyone is there is a nice feeling.

What I am so amazed at is that before I came on here I didnt realise how many people had this disease. I dont know any of my friends or within the rest of my family that are going through this and yet there are literally hundreds of people on here and probably lots more that just read and dont post. Its incredible.