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My Mum has been given Psychotics

Beverly L

Registered User
Apr 5, 2021
11
0
Hi,
My Mum has been admitted to a care home as my step dad is in hospital and unable to care for her at home. She isn't getting on very well and feels she has been imprisoned. On arrival her behaviour deteriorated but then seemed to improve a little though she was still wanting to go home. Today they took her to the residents lounge and she kicked off so the emergency mental health team were called and she was given an anti psychotic. I'm really worried and just want to take her home but I know she wouldn't manage. Any advice would be gratefully received.
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
2,818
0
Hi @Beverly L and welcome to Dementia Talking Point This is a very friendly and supportive place.
My mother was also very unhappy when she moved to a care home. She was used to going out and about and tried to escape on frequent occasions. Unfortunalty she put herself at risk while she was at home by going out drinking with random men in her local pub and I felt I had no option but to move her into care. The mental health team proscribed lorazepam to calm mum down, and that worked to a degree though she still wants to go home. The home in question is her parent's house in the 1930s.
It's early days for your mum, so she may well settle. Being given anti-psychotics sound drastic, but if it improves her quality of life it is a good short term solution. I think it might be worth talking to the home's manager about how they are going to manage your mother's behaviour. It could be that the home isn't geared up for people whose dementia is challenging. Certainly my mother was on the edge of what her care home could cope with, as most of the residents are much more biddable than she is.
I'm sure others will be along soon with their thoughts and experiences, but in the meantime the search bar at the top of the bag is a good place to search for threads from others that have had similar experiences.
 

Beverly L

Registered User
Apr 5, 2021
11
0
Thank you Sarasa that is really helpful, it's so difficult as keep swinging from normal lucid mum to Dementia confused and mum I don't recognise.
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
1,395
0
Hello @Beverly L

It's incredibly upsetting when a loved one is so distressed but unfortunately not uncommon when they first move into a care home environment. Hopefully your mum will settle soon but, if not, ask about a medication review which can really help. As @Sarasa suggests, also ask about how the staff are dealing with it. They should be looking for any triggers which may be the cause of the distress and seeing if they can do things differently or at different times. There are many of us here who have been through the same thing and truly understand, so keep posting to let us know how things are going.
 

Beverly L

Registered User
Apr 5, 2021
11
0
Thank you so much.
The care home are saying mum probably can't stay there. Apparently she has broken all the locks on the windows and tried to climb out of one today, luckily this set off an alarm and they were able to get her back in. I really don't know what will happen now 😕
 

Sarasa

Volunteer Host
Apr 13, 2018
2,818
0
So sorry to hear that. I think you need to look for somewhere that can better cope with your mother's needs. If you arranged the placement maybe look up EMI homes in your area and see if there is one that will meet your mother's needs. If social services were involved I guess you and the home need to talk to them about what happens next.
It is a worry, but the sooner your mum is settled somewhere that is a better match, the sooner she will start to settle.
We have several poster on here who have had similar experiences, so hopefully one ill be along soon with their suggestions
 

lemonbalm

Registered User
May 21, 2018
1,395
0
I'm sorry to hear that @Beverly L

I had to move my mum to a specialist dementia home due to her "challenging behaviour" (I don't really like the term, as it sounds as they are being difficult on purpose). She managed to get out of the previous home, thumped a carer, broke a door., smashed some glass. It's really distressing to think of our parent in this state, I'm sorry. I suppose I was fortunate in that the care home gave me plenty of time to find somewhere else but it wasn't easy. There was only one care-home (I looked round a lot of them!) which was prepared to take mum and it's not always gone well there but the staff genuinely care for her and love her to bits, partly due to her "feisty nature". The place oozes kindness and they are able to deal with a variety of behaviours with compassion and humour.

It's possible that your mum will calm down with the right medication or will have to be moved elsewhere. Do you have help trying to find somewhere else? I didn't but could really have done with some.

Let us know how things are going and we'll try to help you along. You can take some comfort from the fact that it is very unlikely your mum will remember any of this once she has settled either there or elsewhere.
 

Beverly L

Registered User
Apr 5, 2021
11
0
Hi lemonbalm, thank you for your reply. Mum has settled but is very unhappy where she is. I saw her for the first time yesterday which was really hard as she doesn't understand why she needs to be there. I don't think it is the right place for her and we are looking at other options, social services are being very helpful as are other care homes. I will let you know what happens 😌
 

Helly68

Registered User
Mar 12, 2018
780
0
@Beverly L - this is a really tough time for you and your Mum. My thoughts are with you. Before she had dementia, my Mum had Bipolar Disorder. Things got so bad that at one stage she had to be sectioned, for her own safety. This was very distressing for all concerned, but that process did ensure that she got the treatment she needed.
Once she had mixed dementia, she eventually lived in an EMI unit of a care home. We had issues with her physically attacking the staff during personal care, and we tried various behavioural strategies and lorazepam to combat this. I have to say that the staff were brilliant, even when she was hitting them. She did settle a bit, but if she had not, we might have had to consider a secure unit.
I met with the care home staff and a psychiatrist for a "best interests" meeting. It is very tough being someone else's representative (I had POA) but Mummy would not have been able to take part and I think they found it helpful to have me there.
Finding the right place is hard. Others have suggested asking of homes "What behaviour would you NOT be able to cope with?". Sounds direct but probably a good idea. Mummy could not have been looked after in a standard residential unit, and even a dementia unit there were still issues. I would say, be clear about what the issues have been and push for an assessment of all medication, behavioural interventions (Mummy's staff tired not wearing uniforms at one stage to see if this set her off) and any other issues.
 

Beverly L

Registered User
Apr 5, 2021
11
0
@Helly68 Thank you this is really helpful. The mental health team have today increased mum's lorazepam to 1mg twice a day. I really want a psych assessment as these decisions are made over the phone and I would like someone to see mum. I am really struggling as she just wants to go home and can't understand why she can't. It's an awful situation, we are hoping she can be moved to a more suitable care home.
 

Helly68

Registered User
Mar 12, 2018
780
0
@Beverly L - the current restrictions are tough, I was lucky in that the meetings we had, the psychiatrist did meet Mummy (as well as a psychiatric OT who knew her) and we had discussions face to face (though Mummy could not take part). Mummy had Lorazepam, but it made her so sleepy (she slid off a chair) that we stopped this. Mummy's aggression was really around personal care, not going home. She mentioned home a few times, this was I think her parents bungalow in Ruislip. I think this shows that it is a wish to go back to a less confusing time, rather than a wish to go to a real home. This may not help much, but is very common in dementia. In terms of moving to a more suitable home, you may find that the current home push for this if they feel they cannot meet her needs. It is a very difficult situation, but hopefully that might expedite an assessment in order to find a better placement.
For Mummy, her aggression lessened as the dementia progressed, but she was able to stay in the EMI unit until she died.
The next step seems to be to see what effect the Lorazepam has. Hopefully she will be calmer. When Mummy talked of going home (which fortunately wasn't very often) I tried to be quite vague. There was no point in trying to reason with her. She also hoped, from time to time that her (long dead) parents would visit. I would say that I didn't think they would come today. It is very sad but there isn't much point in trying to say anything else.
I hope you get some support or progress with this soon.
 

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