my dear mum


Registered User
Aug 30, 2006
I am struggling my mum in law is in the latter stages of alzheimers and now yesterday has developed a chest infection, she has been in a nursing home. But what I am finding difficult is I feel I'm grieving on my own, all the immediate family are dealing in their own way which is as a family unit. I feel guilty at feeling like this but I honestly feel so lonely over this. When my other half returns home its like walking on egg shells and his way of dealing with it is not talk about it so some of the time I never knows whats going on. I was so close to his Mum, I think of her when I try to be strong. Sorry if I've had a good moan but this is the one place I know will understand me.

Squirrel xx


Registered User
Mar 31, 2010
Squirrel hi,
It's so difficult when families gather together in the way they cope with things and you are left out, very lonely and hurtful when you care for your MIL. I hope that she gets over her chest infection and starts to feel more comfortable.
You can only care in the way that's right for you and walking on egg shells is not a comfy way to live, my heart goes out to you as you try to find the right way to share your caring.
Take care of yourself, best wishes, Jo

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
I`m sorry you are not being included in the family unit squirrel. It is very hurtful. Have you mentioned it? They might not know you are as upset about your mother in law as you are.

Glad you could come to the TP family unit. :)


Registered User
Jan 30, 2009
I hope you find a way of being part of the shared grief, but you have done the right thing for now by coming here and letting us know.
hope you are able to go and see your mum in law, I think it is important for you that you do. It may be that they dont want to put you through unhappiness. my mum in law has been like a mum to me, so I don't think it is at all strange that you have been close, very close.

Keep posting and we will support you, it's not the same as family, but it is very helpful and comforting,

with love