Mum not eating
- Thread starter Jac86
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Offer her anything she'll eat, whatevertime of day. Finger food can be useful- almost a running buffet. pot puddings ( trifle, mousse yoghurt) anything that is just easy, no cutlery needed
Check for infection/Constipation. is she drinking? Fortified drinks
Depends on what stage she's at as to what would happen. She could stay at home.
was this a sudden thing?
Check for infection/Constipation. is she drinking? Fortified drinks
Depends on what stage she's at as to what would happen. She could stay at home.
was this a sudden thing?
There isn't much you can do if other causes have been ruled out as @Jessbow has said. It is not uncommon in dementia for loss of appetite so there might not be any other plausible reason other than it is just the disease and how it affects her. One thing you can do is see the GP about this and also ask for a dietician for a nutritional assessment for supplementing her diet. The other thing is that people with dementia tend to develop a sweet tooth so they tend to prefer puddins, cake etc rather than savoury foods. My mum stopped eating properly some three years ago and she survives on deserts and cake / chocolate and the occasional partially eaten meal if lucky.
My wife is going that way too. Eats a sweet cereal for breakfast, and in between it's biscuits. At lunchtime (I try to keep a routine) though she will eat a cob filled with anything tasty. After that, though, its back to the biscuits. Sweet fruit helps, like oranges or soft pears. Hard to get her to eat after that. Not on he subject of food, has anyone come across the person they are caring for cutting their hair ( badly )? Our hairdresser came today, and spotted it. I thought I had successfully hidden all the scissors , but I think she found the nail scissors in the bathroom. Didn't count them as scissors. Now they are also hidden. She now has continence problems, the Community Nurse service are coming to assess her next week. It is heart breaking to see.
She still recognise me, and knows her relatives, but when with me, she sits and stares at me, when I ask if she needs anything, she says no, so when I ask why are you staring? she has no answer. Anyone had this experience? Sometimes, as a carer, you feel so alone. Good job we have the forum.
She still recognise me, and knows her relatives, but when with me, she sits and stares at me, when I ask if she needs anything, she says no, so when I ask why are you staring? she has no answer. Anyone had this experience? Sometimes, as a carer, you feel so alone. Good job we have the forum.
My mum does this, she will stare either at me or into the distance, its as if her train of thought has altered and she is somewhere else, it can last for minutes and even trying to distract her doesn't always work. It is exceptionally hard to deal with. I don't know about your situation @Mazurka but we are now at the point of no recognition which does emotionally get to me but I also recognise this is who my mum is now.
Its a gradual thing really, I've cared for my mum 8 years and in the last 18 months I'd say we've shifted to being familiar and now finally no recognition of who I am.
Sad to say, I am at the end of my tether. Sorted out some continence pants, they are disposable. So she puts them on ---on top of cotton pants!. I asked her why, and she cannot explain. It seems whatever I say, she just ignores. Am I being a bad carer? I don't think so, but I don't think I will be able to cope for what may be years.
Care home? I don't like the idea, but what is the alternative? At this rate, it will probably be me going into a mental ward. What do you do when it gets this bad? Nobody seems to have any answers.
Care home? I don't like the idea, but what is the alternative? At this rate, it will probably be me going into a mental ward. What do you do when it gets this bad? Nobody seems to have any answers.
Shes got problems with sequencing. Putting clothes on in the wrong order is typical dementia. With OH the best thing is to hand him his clothes as he needs to put them on and make sure he gets them on the right way round.
Id remove the cotton pants
You are not a bad carer, just a human that is tired and doing the best you can. I can see my mum in law has trouble with the sequence of things sometimes. I put clean clothes on her bed and she came out with the dirty ones she'd got out of the laundry basket. She's also put pyjamas over her clothes. It sometimes feels they get it wrong on purpose or to be difficult but I am learning how complex an illness it is and trying to be patient and remember it's dementia that's being difficult not them. I would get rid of the other pants if they are causing confusion.
Maybe try small very small meals she likes, do something else after, deflect, try same again, she probably won’t remember eating, but it might get twice as much down. It’s been working for me, hope it helps 💖
My Mum changed her mind about what she liked to eat from week to week . I’m a pretty good cook and cooked nice meals . One evening she went out into the garden and threw her dinner over the back fence ( fortunately it borders on woodland not the neighbours) I went out and asked her why , I never got cross when she left food on her plate . Before lockdown, she went shopping on her own and returned with cakes , crisps , biscuits and sweets. Some to share with us but some she kept in her own lounge . She was diabetic, but didn’t want to be reminded . As my son often said to me « Don’t sweat the small stuff «
On the other topic, she did stare at people or into the distance . Bit unnerving for my youngest granddaughter.
On the other topic, she did stare at people or into the distance . Bit unnerving for my youngest granddaughter.
Palerider My dad went the same way. Some days he didn’t know anyone at all. Next time you saw some little signs that he recognised you. I found it very hard at first , but consoled myself with the fact when he didn’t recognise me he was in his own little world with no worries. When he started forgetting names and places he had left things he used to get very frustrated with himself and extremely sad. So in a way I suppose it was better for him when he forgot everything. ( even if that made it even harder for us)
Have you asked about respite care. Even for a couple of days. I did this with my dad and it gave me a couple of days to think things through and change the way I viewed what was going on. You need to put yourself first as hard as that seems. Because you won’t be any help to anyone if you end up ill.
About hair cutting, years ago when my mom was in a care home she somehow found scissors. She not only cut her hair but decided other residents could also use a hair cut. (I’m not sure where the staff was when she was doing this.) They kinda all looked like punk rockers after my mom was finish with their hair. The director was great she had a spa day for my mom and the residents whose hair my mom had cut. They brought in a beautician to try to fix everyone’s hair and the aides did everyone’s nails. They then did glamor photos of everyone. Putting fancy hats and scarves on the residents.
My husband has just been diagnosed as diabetic ,but after years of not eating chocolate,cakes or biscuits,they have suddenly become his favourite foods,how do I manage his diet but still get him to eat?
My partner struggles with this too. I try and just give her what she wants - usually chips!! - and small amounts. I found that she was put off by a full portion and would just ignore it.
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