My mum went into a care home nearly a year ago. She is 82 with mixed dementia. On the whole it has gone well and the home is very good. However I worry that she is a bit ‘lost’. She is quite deafened but has always refused to wear hearing aids so she finds it hard to have a conversation with residents or staff. She is still very articulate but talks ‘at’ people incessantly with very little meaning. I can follow some of her thought processes as it is usually about her childhood home and school, but I have heard another resident say “we don’t know what you are talking about” and avoid her. Luckily mum didn’t hear this! She has (and has always) had obsessions and very little intrest in other people - she has always lived in her own world. She could never make friends and relied totally on my dad and her family for personal relationships. All of these traits are more obvious with the dementia. It’s like she is behind a glass wall, desperate to connect but unable to.
The one connection she briefly made was with another resident who is more advanced in dementia and non verbal but reacts with a smile when spoken to. Apparently mum would sit and just chat away. However that seems to have fizzled out. She is can be quite harsh and rude to other residents - she says they annoy her. She spends a lot of time I her room with the door locked including to eat her meals. I realise this is possibly a control mechanism.
I visit almost daily and take her out most weeks but beyond that I worry that she is lost as the staff simply do not have the time to sit with her for even a few minutes.
I know I am probably analysing this from my perspective/feelings but it is a worry.
The one connection she briefly made was with another resident who is more advanced in dementia and non verbal but reacts with a smile when spoken to. Apparently mum would sit and just chat away. However that seems to have fizzled out. She is can be quite harsh and rude to other residents - she says they annoy her. She spends a lot of time I her room with the door locked including to eat her meals. I realise this is possibly a control mechanism.
I visit almost daily and take her out most weeks but beyond that I worry that she is lost as the staff simply do not have the time to sit with her for even a few minutes.
I know I am probably analysing this from my perspective/feelings but it is a worry.