Moving to a care home

[pevensey]

There's been a lot of information in the press recently about people having to sell their homes to pay for their care, with a lot of emphasis on family members 'losing their inheritance'. People seem to think that inheritance is a 'right', but it only applies after someone has died. You may need to pay for your own care at some point in the future, and unless there is a radical change to the current social care provisions (politicians keep promising but there's rarely any meaningful action) then the reality is that you would need to fund some/all of your care yourself. I hope that your children realise that they shouldn't expect an inheritance. My sister and I are currently in the process of selling the home that has been in the family for 90 years to pay for my Mum's care, and are under no illusion that there will be any money left as an 'inheritance' once her care has been paid for. Having had previous bad experiences of homes that Mum was placed in by social services we would rather have the ability to choose good care for her than an inheritance.

Hi Louise7, that sounds very stressful what your going through with your Mums house and yes I totally agree when you say our children should not presume they are entitled to a inheritance when their parents have passed away, and fortunately my 3 children think the same, and yes I would rather pay a bit extra and know my hubby is in a good friendly caring care home and I've seen some lovely ones today, but will keep him at home as long as I can. Try and hang on till our 57th wedding anniversary in November even though he probably wont remember. it. I hope your difficult situation goes through without too many problems, it must be a emotional time for you having to sell a house that's been part of your family for such a long time

 

[Brumsteve]

Thank you everyone for you advice. After reading many many websites and taking your advice on board I think and hope I know what we need to do.

I have just one more question - my Mom is deteriorating quite rapidly and we think she needs to find a home quite soon. She has started to do some quite strange things. We have her social worker visiting this afternoon to start the process of recommendation and also sorting out the DP forms for funding her place. Should she need to go in before me and my sister have found a place for her can the LA place her somewhere as respite care (then we move her to a permanent home when we have found her somewhere) and would we have to pay for this short term care?

 

[mancmum]

My father was self funding but social services did intervene and they insisted that a best interests decision was taken before my father left my care to go into a care home. Just warning you in case the same happens to you. This delayed the admission to a care home. In or der to ensure that care was in place before I left to take a holiday with husband I had to say that I would leave him at their office on the day I wen t to the airport. It was a very horrible thing to have to do, but without that I don't think they would have responded quickly enough.

 

[Brumsteve]

Just an update since I posted my other question.

Social worker has visited and confirmed that she should move into residential care. They have given us forms for a DPA but she will be self funding. They will also sort out a placement for her as it's quite urgent she is moved from her own home and give me and my sister a little bit of breathing space to look at other places and to get the house on the market.

Thanks again for all your help.

 

[Cat27]

I’m glad you’ve got things moving @Brumsteve.