My mom had been widowed for about a year. Since then, she has had memory issues and personality changes. She now seems very fragile, crying easily at things that never used to bother her, using bad language for the first time in her life, less inhibited when conversing with strangers. When she recounts a story, we are left thinking "we were there and thats not really what happened". Doesn't seem to remember things she has been told. She tells us her memory is great when we have brought up our concerns. She went to her doctor for a routine physical and reports she passed the memory test (hard to know if that is true or not, but because if confidentiality, we can't ask the doctor). Something definite is not feeling right with the memory and personality changes, but since she seems to have passed whatever screening she was given, there seems to be nothing we can do. Family is very concerned. Any thoughts on how one can pursue this further, or perhaps we are stuck waiting for her to deteriorate further and readress. Am wondering if this is early dementia or depression. Really would love a full neurological evaluation, but don't think she will agree since she thinks she is fine.
Mother with concerning symptoms
- Thread starter cat123
- Start date
A warm welcome to Dementia Support Forum @cat123.
Your description of your mother sounds very familiar to me. My own mother was similar, specially in the telling of stories that don't seem right, often merging two or three together. As her day to day memory seemed good I didn't really think dementia, even when she fell in love with a tour rep she met on holiday and spun more and more elaborate fantasies around what had happened.
What you can do is send your mum's GP a bullet pointed list of your concerns and ask for your mum to be re-assessed. Go with her and prompt if need be. My mum was doing fine in the test, as it really does only test short-term memory, until we mentioned her concerns about her neighbours. The stories she told about them wanting to steal her blood pressure medication made the GP realise something was awry. I was lucky in that my mum went to her GP with lots of minor things so it was easy to piggyback another appointment she had, 'I'm here visiting, I might as well come with you and then we can go straight out for a coffee.' The doctor should then refer her to the memory clinic.
I'd also get Lasting Power of Attorney sorted if you haven't already. That will make things much easier when she starts to need more help.
This is a very friendly and supportive site, and others will be along very shortly with their ideas and suggestions.
Your description of your mother sounds very familiar to me. My own mother was similar, specially in the telling of stories that don't seem right, often merging two or three together. As her day to day memory seemed good I didn't really think dementia, even when she fell in love with a tour rep she met on holiday and spun more and more elaborate fantasies around what had happened.
What you can do is send your mum's GP a bullet pointed list of your concerns and ask for your mum to be re-assessed. Go with her and prompt if need be. My mum was doing fine in the test, as it really does only test short-term memory, until we mentioned her concerns about her neighbours. The stories she told about them wanting to steal her blood pressure medication made the GP realise something was awry. I was lucky in that my mum went to her GP with lots of minor things so it was easy to piggyback another appointment she had, 'I'm here visiting, I might as well come with you and then we can go straight out for a coffee.' The doctor should then refer her to the memory clinic.
I'd also get Lasting Power of Attorney sorted if you haven't already. That will make things much easier when she starts to need more help.
This is a very friendly and supportive site, and others will be along very shortly with their ideas and suggestions.
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