Louis Therouxs Dementia Documentary Thurs PM, preview clip
- Thread starter danny
- Start date
I agree Tina, Louis goes in with a sort of innocence that in this case worked really effectively to show how dementia affects people. At one point he seemed to almost not believe that Suelinda couldn't read the numbers on her phone, but when she drew that clock face I thought it was upsetting watching her trying to put the numbers on. I was relieved when he suspended the test. X
I think the fact I'm "out the other side" also makes me have a different perspective. Perhaps a year ago, the feelings I was experiencing would have possibly given me a different take on it. I'm at the stage in grief where my mum (pre-dementia) is just starting to come back to me, so much of the anger and distress is slowly dissolving.
It's such a sensitive area, but I'm really glad they've approached it, and watching it alone has helped! I would have felt more on edge had my husband been in the room!
Twitter seems to be going pretty crazy. Some of the tweets are quite naive, but any publicity is good, I suppose. The naivety reflects real-life attitudes, so I mustn't get angry at that. But on the whole, it appears to have touched many people.
It's such a sensitive area, but I'm really glad they've approached it, and watching it alone has helped! I would have felt more on edge had my husband been in the room!
Twitter seems to be going pretty crazy. Some of the tweets are quite naive, but any publicity is good, I suppose. The naivety reflects real-life attitudes, so I mustn't get angry at that. But on the whole, it appears to have touched many people.
My son text me as it was starting so I turned it on. I thought the programme was sensitive and I loved the elderly couple especially.
My heart went out to the family with the mother only 49 who had early onset - tragic.
For once they even gave a brief view of the tail end of this dreaful disease.
I was shocked to hear the wife of the dentist wanting to move on - my son said he felt the marriage had not been a happy one but non the less harsh.
My heart went out to the family with the mother only 49 who had early onset - tragic.
For once they even gave a brief view of the tail end of this dreaful disease.
I was shocked to hear the wife of the dentist wanting to move on - my son said he felt the marriage had not been a happy one but non the less harsh.
i feel very sad after watching it. i must admit it has scared me although it was very very moving and sensitively made.
as a 45 year old with a 3 year old child seeing the lady with the 9 year old has made me really think what life could be like for bethany in a few years time. in fact what life could be like for my husband and older daughter too.
im kind of glad my husband didnt watch it as he is fast asleep in bed but i really really need a hug and be told everything is going to be alright.
to all those TP members who are going through this agony with their loved ones or have done whether they be at home or in a care home, my heart goes out to you all and behalf of dementia sufferers i want to say thank you for caring.
Linda xxx
as a 45 year old with a 3 year old child seeing the lady with the 9 year old has made me really think what life could be like for bethany in a few years time. in fact what life could be like for my husband and older daughter too.
im kind of glad my husband didnt watch it as he is fast asleep in bed but i really really need a hug and be told everything is going to be alright.
to all those TP members who are going through this agony with their loved ones or have done whether they be at home or in a care home, my heart goes out to you all and behalf of dementia sufferers i want to say thank you for caring.
Linda xxx
You were courageous to watch it Linda. I thought of you when I saw the family with the young daughter and wondered if you would be watching and how you would feel.
The young woman was trying so hard to be all right.
I have not yet been able to watch the Panorama programme.
The young woman was trying so hard to be all right.
I have not yet been able to watch the Panorama programme.
This sounds a very interesting program. And as I live over here pertinent. I'll have to see if I can find it somewhere.
Some random observations: I seem to be in the minority in finding it a shallow look at the subject, dementia as entertainment. The Wonderland doc concentrating on one family's struggles (which was slaughtered on here) was much more meaningful to me.
I found the blonde female manager irritating and robotic. The dentist man was quite spooky as he barely seemed ill at all, I've never seen someone that sharp with dementia. The woman who just repeated a word was disturbing, is that common? And talking in front of people like they're not there, even if they have dementia, really grates.
Anyway he explains himself more here but doesn't seem to have much knowledge of the subject, as he describes the home practices as being as a result of the influence of Tom Kitwood, rather than being completely standard.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-17844315
I found the blonde female manager irritating and robotic. The dentist man was quite spooky as he barely seemed ill at all, I've never seen someone that sharp with dementia. The woman who just repeated a word was disturbing, is that common? And talking in front of people like they're not there, even if they have dementia, really grates.
Anyway he explains himself more here but doesn't seem to have much knowledge of the subject, as he describes the home practices as being as a result of the influence of Tom Kitwood, rather than being completely standard.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-17844315
I got the feeling that the dentist had shown a lot of agression and a controlling nature in the past and that his wife had probably carried on caring for him when, if things had been without AD, she would have left him.
I did feel they could have let us over-hear a bit more of Nancy having personal care.
When I saw SueLinda I thought if you Linda. Suelinda's daughter seems to have a good understanding on how to communicate with her Mum which I hope carried on.
I cried when I saw the room of people at the end of their lives as that will be Mum's future.
Louis showed a very good grasp of when a physical touch spoke volumes to comfort someone. The only time I was cross with him was when he questioned the use of the mobile phone. He was taken in by how unaffected SueLinda loooked.
I did feel they could have let us over-hear a bit more of Nancy having personal care.
When I saw SueLinda I thought if you Linda. Suelinda's daughter seems to have a good understanding on how to communicate with her Mum which I hope carried on.
I cried when I saw the room of people at the end of their lives as that will be Mum's future.
Louis showed a very good grasp of when a physical touch spoke volumes to comfort someone. The only time I was cross with him was when he questioned the use of the mobile phone. He was taken in by how unaffected SueLinda loooked.
I'm afraid that woman reminded me so much of my David at the start of that dreadful journey, and 'trying so hard to be all right' sums it up perfectly.
I found her laughing was almost as if she was embarrassed that she couldn't do what what asked of her - again a reminder of David.
I found the whole programme very upsetting.
Dear Linda,
My heart goes out to you for how the programme must have affected you personally. You have my utmost respect.
Watching the 49 year lady come to terms with her illness and how her beautiful daughter was preparing for changes touched me deeply. It made me question how that would make me feel if it were me...so I can only imagine what you must have felt.
As I said in my first post, I was left with feelings of admiration and awe at the families and sufferers courage.
I can only touch the edge of what fears must go through your head but you face it with such determination and dignity that your children will have these characteristics passed onto them. You will have taught them so much to prepare them for life, no matter how sad the reason.
My youngest child is also three, so I can feel your pain when I walk in your shoes, just for a minute. My two older children tell me stories of events when they were 3, and sometimes younger. I gasp and say I can't believe they remember them!! Usually simple things, they have happy memories, and it warms me to think that though my youngest hasn't told me yet, she will be building and storing memories right now. Your little one will be doing the same. They take things as they come, and they know no different. Happy memories will erase any sad ones, and although I may be an adult, I'm beginning to see that for myself. I treasure the good times, and thank my mum for providing them in the lifetime she was given.
I always say that when my time comes, my children will remember me for being the best mum they could ever have had; that they will laugh when they remember the silly things we did together; that they pass on the love and respect we have for each other to their own children; that they learn to care and be kind. Whatever time I have with them on this earth, I will strive to plant these seeds. I may not have a time-line, as such, but losing my parents has changed my outlook. Life is short. I will spend it making memories for my children.
I imagine you are driven this way too, xxxxx
My heart goes out to you for how the programme must have affected you personally. You have my utmost respect.
Watching the 49 year lady come to terms with her illness and how her beautiful daughter was preparing for changes touched me deeply. It made me question how that would make me feel if it were me...so I can only imagine what you must have felt.
As I said in my first post, I was left with feelings of admiration and awe at the families and sufferers courage.
I can only touch the edge of what fears must go through your head but you face it with such determination and dignity that your children will have these characteristics passed onto them. You will have taught them so much to prepare them for life, no matter how sad the reason.
My youngest child is also three, so I can feel your pain when I walk in your shoes, just for a minute. My two older children tell me stories of events when they were 3, and sometimes younger. I gasp and say I can't believe they remember them!! Usually simple things, they have happy memories, and it warms me to think that though my youngest hasn't told me yet, she will be building and storing memories right now. Your little one will be doing the same. They take things as they come, and they know no different. Happy memories will erase any sad ones, and although I may be an adult, I'm beginning to see that for myself. I treasure the good times, and thank my mum for providing them in the lifetime she was given.
I always say that when my time comes, my children will remember me for being the best mum they could ever have had; that they will laugh when they remember the silly things we did together; that they pass on the love and respect we have for each other to their own children; that they learn to care and be kind. Whatever time I have with them on this earth, I will strive to plant these seeds. I may not have a time-line, as such, but losing my parents has changed my outlook. Life is short. I will spend it making memories for my children.
I imagine you are driven this way too, xxxxx
I sat down to watch the programme thinking I was going to see a different and radical way of caring for people with dementia. This might have been because I watched last week's episode on children with autism. I was left thinking 'well that's all very nice, but I haven't learned anything, and it didn't reflect some of the experiences we went through'.
Having considered it further I can see that the programme was not so much aimed at people like us who know what dementia can be (warts and all), and was not designed to shock. It seemed more to be a gentle and respectful introduction to dementia, to educate the viewer that people with dementia are ordinary people and the issues they face on a day to day basis.
I thought the exchanges between the older couple were fantastic - when the husband was explaining to his wife that he more than 'liked' her, her asking was he talking about sex, and if so she didn't think she was sure about that and him responding with 'Well that's a blow!' It was a reminder that there is still humour in dementia.
Having considered it further I can see that the programme was not so much aimed at people like us who know what dementia can be (warts and all), and was not designed to shock. It seemed more to be a gentle and respectful introduction to dementia, to educate the viewer that people with dementia are ordinary people and the issues they face on a day to day basis.
I thought the exchanges between the older couple were fantastic - when the husband was explaining to his wife that he more than 'liked' her, her asking was he talking about sex, and if so she didn't think she was sure about that and him responding with 'Well that's a blow!' It was a reminder that there is still humour in dementia.
I think the title was well thought through "extreme love" covers how love is tested both when parents love autistic children and how people love when dementia strikes. It is a tribute to humanity to see how much love there is at difficult times and I guess I'm reminded of what Phillip Gould said, I think, when he was very ill, that in the end, the only thing that matters is love.
I've been thinking about my first post on this thread and maybe what I think and hope is that this programme will have made some people consider dementia for the first time. There isn't really anything anyone can do to prepare you for the dementia until it happens, but, with love you can hope to endure and perhaps even triumph over the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. X
I've been thinking about my first post on this thread and maybe what I think and hope is that this programme will have made some people consider dementia for the first time. There isn't really anything anyone can do to prepare you for the dementia until it happens, but, with love you can hope to endure and perhaps even triumph over the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. X
My husband and I watched it together-a bit of a 'first' as he has only recently begun to take a real interest. Wer were both surprised by how very bare and uninspiring the walls and rooms in the care home were.
It has made me realise how fortunate we are to have such a wonderful care home for Mum. The walls are covered with pictures of flowers and clever craftwork pictures and the staff are every bit as kind as the ones in the programme.
After watching Panorama earlier this week this programme made me feel more 'comforted.'
The elderly couple were lovely. It was good to see a little of her feisty character still there and the sense of humour in both of them was beautiful to see. I feel for them for later when it will get harder for him to keep up with the demands of this awful illness.
And I, too, admire you, Linda, for watching the younger family coping with the disease.
I hope you managed to get your hug.
And please have a virtual one from me.
http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgu...FIPo8QOotqXuDg&sqi=2&ved=0CDcQ9QEwAw&dur=6262
Maggie
It has made me realise how fortunate we are to have such a wonderful care home for Mum. The walls are covered with pictures of flowers and clever craftwork pictures and the staff are every bit as kind as the ones in the programme.
After watching Panorama earlier this week this programme made me feel more 'comforted.'
The elderly couple were lovely. It was good to see a little of her feisty character still there and the sense of humour in both of them was beautiful to see. I feel for them for later when it will get harder for him to keep up with the demands of this awful illness.
And I, too, admire you, Linda, for watching the younger family coping with the disease.
I hope you managed to get your hug.
And please have a virtual one from me.
http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgu...FIPo8QOotqXuDg&sqi=2&ved=0CDcQ9QEwAw&dur=6262
Maggie
It seems I am the only coward on TP. I just feel so overwhelmed and immersed in dementia at the moment that I couldn't face more on TV. Added to the fact that I did actually feel unwell last evening - and I still haven't got around to replacing my main TV with a digital one yet and so use my old 14inch analogue one in my bedroom as I do not watch much TV at all nowadays. The latter are excuses though as I proabaly wouldn't have watched it anyway.
I feel guilty now
PS; Maybe I might watch it on iplayer.
I feel guilty nowPS; Maybe I might watch it on iplayer.
It seems I am the only coward on TP. I just feel so overwhelmed and immersed in dementia at the moment that I couldn't face more on TV. Added to the fact that I did actually feel unwell last evening - and I still haven't got around to replacing my main TV with a digital one yet and so use my old 14inch analogue one in my bedroom as I do not watch much TV at all nowadays. The latter are excuses though as I proabaly wouldn't have watched it anyway.
PS; Maybe I might watch it on iplayer.
Saffie, don't feel guilty!!!
I wasn't really up to the Panorama one and it did leave me feeling a bit low. You don't have to torture yourself.
I know what you mean about having enough of dementia at the moment. I recently had an email inviting me to 'An Evening With Dementia' and my first thought was, 'after a day with dementia I don't know whether I can face an evening with it as well.'
However, it's a one act play that's touring at the moment. I think they should have chosen a better title.
Dear Saffie,
I think there should be a warning at the beginning of programmes like this, like they do when there's strobe lighting (I missed the beginning so maybe there was??) I told my brother to watch this with his wife as I thought it might help them with their mum. Unfortunately it didn't because they couldn't see any comparisons with their mum in the case studies and they now think their mum is even more unusual and extreme than they believed. We had to agree that if their mum was like the people on the film it would be a little easier to show compassion.
Don't get me wrong I still think this was a good programme. Haven't read the reviews yet but hope it has helped some people out there.
xxx
I think there should be a warning at the beginning of programmes like this, like they do when there's strobe lighting (I missed the beginning so maybe there was??) I told my brother to watch this with his wife as I thought it might help them with their mum. Unfortunately it didn't because they couldn't see any comparisons with their mum in the case studies and they now think their mum is even more unusual and extreme than they believed. We had to agree that if their mum was like the people on the film it would be a little easier to show compassion
.Don't get me wrong I still think this was a good programme. Haven't read the reviews yet but hope it has helped some people out there.
xxx
You a coward? Never, never, never. You are one of the gutsiest people I know. I wouldn't have watched this programme a year ago, but thankfully I have come out of that painful stage for just a short while.
Just because dementia is close to all our hearts, it is not written in stone we should spend what is left of our lives with even more than we already have.
Saffie I know exactly how you feel. I started helping at a COGS group but backed down, realising I had enough unavoidable demetia in my life without opting for more.
It is our choice whether or not we can embrace any extra, whether we want to be involved with any extra or whether we only accept what we cannot avoid.
No explanations are necessary.
By being here on TP we are supporting each other and learning along the way. I suspect most TP regulars are better informed than many and express our views of these programmes from a different perspective.
I would love to know how many people not directly involved with dementia watch these programmes.
Saffie I know exactly how you feel. I started helping at a COGS group but backed down, realising I had enough unavoidable demetia in my life without opting for more.
It is our choice whether or not we can embrace any extra, whether we want to be involved with any extra or whether we only accept what we cannot avoid.
No explanations are necessary.
By being here on TP we are supporting each other and learning along the way. I suspect most TP regulars are better informed than many and express our views of these programmes from a different perspective.
I would love to know how many people not directly involved with dementia watch these programmes.
Yes I know what you mean. Thinking more about this I suppose the audience (other than those involved with dementia) might be anyone involved with or knowing someone who might be prone to or experiencing mental health problems. People with autism, aspergers, those who suffer from depression, schizophrenia, addiction, anxiety. Might be a pretty big audience on reflection?
Recent Threads
-
-
Mum has passed away and now Dad is on his own
- Latest: Collywobbles
-
-
-
-
-
