Losing

Angel 4

Registered User
Jan 27, 2022
99
0
Essex
Hello,
I’ve posted here before, my husband has FAD he is 53, I’m 46 we have 3 children. I’m really struggling… how do you cope with everything changing, I’m just finding it all so hard, I feel so alone in all of this. Everything is changing and I just feel so helpless. Our relationship is so different now, I feel so guilty for feeling so angry. I know nobody knows what’s coming but this just feels so unfair.
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
24,701
0
South coast
You are right @Angel 4 - it is unfair
There is nothing about dementia that is fair at all

Unfortunately there is nothing you can do to stop it, so you have to look after yourself, pick up some tips from here, get in extra help and just do the best you can.
xx
 

Raest

Registered User
Jan 15, 2022
44
0
Give the Alzheimer’s line a call, I believe there is a number on here somewhere. They can discuss what options are open to you locally so you don’t feel so alone. It is normal to feel angry as your future has now taken such a dramatic change.
 

Jessbow

Registered User
Mar 1, 2013
5,623
0
Midlands
It is unfair. Unfair....with knobs on.
Its cruel when is a parent, doubly cruel when its husnbd/wife...and double again when you have young children.
None of you deserve this
(( Hug))
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
1,933
0
Surrey
Hi @Angel 4

You have so much on ur plate 😢😢
as well as the dementia line here you can also call the Admiral Nurses. I spoke with them last week. It was really helpful and I know I can go back for more support when needed.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,215
0
Kent
Give the Alzheimer’s line a call, I believe there is a number on here somewhere. They can discuss what options are open to you locally so you don’t feel so alone


This is the number. You have nothing to lose @Raest they may have a suggestion that hasn`t occurred to you.

 

GD11

New member
Sep 12, 2023
4
0
Keep your chin up
I am in a similar position as my wife has FAD and is 50
I am more than aware what lies ahead as 2 of her sibling’s have already been on this journey although I’m not sure if that makes it any easier or not
My wife is in the early mid stages now and changes can be difficult to get a handle on.
You have every right to get angry and shouldn’t feel guilty about it although from my experience it can be frustration rather than anger which can be easily misinterpreted
I hope you find the help you need as it is available out there
 

Sarahkb

Registered User
Apr 3, 2022
53
0
Hi I can relate to your post. Husband 50 and 2 small children. Feeling very similar so wanted to share that you are not alone. It’s just all so unfair and so cruel. I survive by really trying not to think too far ahead. One week at a time otherwise anxiety gets the better of me. Sending love xx
 

Angel 4

Registered User
Jan 27, 2022
99
0
Essex
Keep your chin up
I am in a similar position as my wife has FAD and is 50
I am more than aware what lies ahead as 2 of her sibling’s have already been on this journey although I’m not sure if that makes it any easier or not
My wife is in the early mid stages now and changes can be difficult to get a handle on.
You have every right to get angry and shouldn’t feel guilty about it although from my experience it can be frustration rather than anger which can be easily misinterpreted
I hope you find the help you need as it is available out there
Thank you @ GD11
Hi I can relate to your post. Husband 50 and 2 small children. Feeling very similar so wanted to share that you are not alone. It’s just all so unfair and so cruel. I survive by really trying not to think too far ahead. One week at a time otherwise anxiety gets the better of me. Sending love xx
Thank you @Sarahkb for your reply, I’m so sorry you too are going through this awful situation. Like you I try hard not to think to far ahead but sometimes it just so hard not too.
Sending love to you, thank you for reaching out xx
 

Angel 4

Registered User
Jan 27, 2022
99
0
Essex
Keep your chin up
I am in a similar position as my wife has FAD and is 50
I am more than aware what lies ahead as 2 of her sibling’s have already been on this journey although I’m not sure if that makes it any easier or not
My wife is in the early mid stages now and changes can be difficult to get a handle on.
You have every right to get angry and shouldn’t feel guilty about it although from my experience it can be frustration rather than anger which can be easily misinterpreted
I hope you find the help you need as it is available out there
Thank you for your reply, I’m sorry that you’re in the same situation. Like your wife my husband has lost 2 siblings & his Mum to this awful disease. It’s so cruel.
What help have you found that has helped you?
 

GD11

New member
Sep 12, 2023
4
0
Thank you for your reply, I’m sorry that you’re in the same situation. Like your wife my husband has lost 2 siblings & his Mum to this awful disease. It’s so cruel.
What help have you found that has helped you?
The support from the nhs has been very good and a good social worker for my wife has helped me,also the fact that I have been on this journey with my wife’s family has also helped prepare me.
A few things had caught me unawares that I hadn’t foreseen and it was difficult until I got a handle on it and learned to deal with it.
 

Angel 4

Registered User
Jan 27, 2022
99
0
Essex
You are right @Angel 4 - it is unfair
There is nothing about dementia that is fair at all

Unfortunately there is nothing you can do to stop it, so you have to look after yourself, pick up some tips from here, get in extra help and just do the best you can.
xx
Thank you @canary for your reply, it’s good to know that people here understand xx