Long Slow Days trying to keep mum occupied

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by wonderfulmum, Jun 20, 2019.

  1. wonderfulmum

    wonderfulmum Registered User

    Aug 20, 2015
    18
    After mums carer has been and gone mum is bored anxious and restless what to do with her day. It's agony trying to get from 1 hour to the next. I do activities with her and give her things to do but if she doesn't want to do them she won't. I feel my time passing away too as I wish the time and day away which makes me frustrated and sad. Is anyone else experiencing their lives passing away too
     
  2. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    8,373
    leicester
    Hello @wonderfulmum have you considered daycare? then your Mum would be taken care of and you could regain some ‘me’ time
     
  3. wonderfulmum

    wonderfulmum Registered User

    Aug 20, 2015
    18
    Hi yes she goes to one on Wednesdays but though I've tried other day centres she doesn't like them and says don't take me to strange places. I'm thinking of trying befriending service again. Last time I tried it she asked what time they were leaving! She gets bored easily. Feel my life is being wished away too as we try to get to the end of each day only to start again the next morning.
     
  4. Sarahdun

    Sarahdun Registered User

    May 18, 2014
    390
    very familiar with all this - I would try the befriending service - definitely a good idea. I found the relentless dependence on others for stimulation and my sense of just waiting for the day to pass very difficult too.
     
  5. Jaded'n'faded

    Jaded'n'faded Registered User

    Jan 23, 2019
    425
    Female
    High Peak
    It's hard. For many with dementia, their world closes in, friends often disappear and they are unable to do the activities they once enjoyed.

    When I visit mum in the CH she's usually in her room reading (or at the door with coat on and bag packed...:rolleyes:) She refuses to socialise or do any activities yet her constant complaint is that she is bored. She thinks she works at the CH or has sometimes been sacked. But mainly she wants to go shopping, not because she needs anything but because that was her main activity before she became ill. It's a good thing she thinks she goes out shopping 'most days' (even though she's not been out for over a year) as otherwise it would be much worse.

    We get stuck in an endless loop: mum says, 'all I do is sit here and read.' I tell her the various things she could do - watch tv, go to the lounge, join in activities, have a walk round, anything I can think of. Then she'll say, 'Oh no! I just want to stay in here by myself and read.'

    I can't imagine what it would be like trying to occupy her all day o_O so I think you're doing an amazing job with your mum.
     
  6. wonderfulmum

    wonderfulmum Registered User

    Aug 20, 2015
    18
    Aw thank you. It is very hard and yes most of mums friends have fallen by the wayside so days are tough.
     

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