I have vascular dementia and i am only 55. Just had to retire. I have a beautiful home and 2 beautiful daughters and 2 beautiful granddaughters. I am crying as i type this. I had so many plans. I barely can watch my granddaughter and the 3 year old is so attached to me and i want be here for them. Life can be so unfair 😪 sometimes. I had so many plans for my future. I was going to get a part-time job for my medical benefits. I wanted to travel and just enjoy the rest of my life. Now my life is over. I died with my diagnosis.
Life can be so unfair sometimes
- Thread starter Kimmyriver1
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Welcome to the forum @Kimmyriver1.
I’m so sorry to read about your diagnosis. It really is heartbreaking. I’m glad you’ve found this forum. I know you will,get lots of understanding and support here.
I’m so sorry to read about your diagnosis. It really is heartbreaking. I’m glad you’ve found this forum. I know you will,get lots of understanding and support here.
Welcome to the forum @Kimmyriver1 ,
I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. My husband was a bit older than you when he was diagnosed (58) but had been struggling a good few years before diagnosis.
Please don't feel that your life is over because of the diagnosis. Life has changed, yes, but there is so much that can still be done. With my husband, we decided to concentrate on what could be done rather than focus on what was no longer possible.
We squeezed in a few holidays abroad while we could and went to places he'd wanted to see around the UK too. I still remember the joy we felt up Mt Snowdon - and the special trip to Portmeirion (a place he'd wanted to visit since becoming an avid fan of The Prisoner tv series in the late 1960s!)
We went down a disused coal mine (I know, not on everyone's wish list, but it topped his 😂), enjoyed horse-drawn barge trips down canals, and visited so many places of historical interest.
My husband had to retire early but he remained involved in life by taking on voluntary work in a charity shop and signing up to volunteer on local community projects.
We made new and strong friendships at various groups we attended (many of them not dementia related at all as he wasn't ready to be pigeon-holed into a category).
When trips away became more difficult we changed to day trips by coach companies - and experienced so many wonderful days out.
i won't rattle on - but just wanted to reassure you that life isn't over. You are in shock and I know it is so hard to see through that overwhelming fear right now - but we are all here for you whenever you need to talk.
I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. My husband was a bit older than you when he was diagnosed (58) but had been struggling a good few years before diagnosis.
Please don't feel that your life is over because of the diagnosis. Life has changed, yes, but there is so much that can still be done. With my husband, we decided to concentrate on what could be done rather than focus on what was no longer possible.
We squeezed in a few holidays abroad while we could and went to places he'd wanted to see around the UK too. I still remember the joy we felt up Mt Snowdon - and the special trip to Portmeirion (a place he'd wanted to visit since becoming an avid fan of The Prisoner tv series in the late 1960s!)
We went down a disused coal mine (I know, not on everyone's wish list, but it topped his 😂), enjoyed horse-drawn barge trips down canals, and visited so many places of historical interest.
My husband had to retire early but he remained involved in life by taking on voluntary work in a charity shop and signing up to volunteer on local community projects.
We made new and strong friendships at various groups we attended (many of them not dementia related at all as he wasn't ready to be pigeon-holed into a category).
When trips away became more difficult we changed to day trips by coach companies - and experienced so many wonderful days out.
i won't rattle on - but just wanted to reassure you that life isn't over. You are in shock and I know it is so hard to see through that overwhelming fear right now - but we are all here for you whenever you need to talk.
Hi Kimmy ,
Firstly I want to give you a massive virtual hug as I have been here but as a daughter who had to accept her dads diagnosis .
You can still do everything you ever wanted to do and make lovely memories with your children and grandchildren - we took my dad to New York and it was amazing .
The world is your oyster and I know it doesn’t seem like that but we are all here for you and your family along the journey - do everything you dreamed of doing .
I know I can’t say I understand but again as a daughter whos dad was a similar age to you I doted on my dad and I’m sure your kids dote on you and will make every memory extra special , sending love xxx
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