Language barrier

[Vera's den]

Hi everyone, it has been a while since I posted so quick recap, I am carer for my father in law who is now in a care home after his aggression became to much.
Now it's my mother who I am trying to care for. Mum is in early stages of dementia although she is in denial but she has many health issues which means she is totally housebound. She has two carers four times a day and this is were the problem lies. The carers are all Asian and when they are there talk to each other in their own language this distresses mum she feels they are talking about her. She is very lonely as although she had seven children they are now scattered around the world. I'm 50 miles away but do see her weekly. She only sees the carers most days and she is very lonely. She really likes the carers which is saying a lot for mum she feels her family should be the ones caring for her.
How can I explain to her carers that mum feels lonelier than ever when she can't join in with the conversation.
I am arranging for a companion to visit twice a week and hoping that this help. Any advice please. Thank Vera

 

[love.dad.but..]

They should not, in her home, be talking to each other in their own language. Dad was in a care home but this was completely forbidden even if carers were not with a resident. Dementia is isolating enough and in limited opportunity for your mum to haveconversation or to engage in the world outside of dementia, this would concern me. Speak to the Care agency manager, they should have a policy, if she defends the matter, consider your options. Good positive Communication is key in dementia.

 

[lemonjuice]

To be honest, I think as she likes the carers, even if they were talking in English, the problem is not really with the language and she would still suspect them of 'talking about her'. Paranoia is fairly classic behaviour.

 

[jugglingmum]

Have you tried contacting the care agency about this?

My husband has a similar issue in work, with conversations conducted in other languages.

In his case it is Dutch that causes the issue (his company was Dutch owned at one stage - and so has several dutch speaking personnel) and he thinks they should speak in English. (other languages used are Welsh and French - he can understand both enough to be OK, and can't object to Welsh in Wales)

He says is just feels like you are being cut out of the office conversation (some days more Dutch in his particular office than English or Welsh speakers) so your mother when it is the only people she sees must feel isolated.

 

[Lawson58]

Hi everyone, it has been a while since I posted so quick recap, I am carer for my father in law who is now in a care home after his aggression became to much.
Now it's my mother who I am trying to care for. Mum is in early stages of dementia although she is in denial but she has many health issues which means she is totally housebound. She has two carers four times a day and this is were the problem lies. The carers are all Asian and when they are there talk to each other in their own language this distresses mum she feels they are talking about her. She is very lonely as although she had seven children they are now scattered around the world. I'm 50 miles away but do see her weekly. She only sees the carers most days and she is very lonely. She really likes the carers which is saying a lot for mum she feels her family should be the ones caring for her.
How can I explain to her carers that mum feels lonelier than ever when she can't join in with the conversation.
I am arranging for a companion to visit twice a week and hoping that this help. Any advice please. Thank Vera

I personally think that whilst there maybe cultural differences, the agency has a responsibility to ensure that their carers behave appropriately in their clients' homes. The carers may not think they are being rude or discourteous but it is more about your mother's welfare and what is in her best interests.

I would be having a very serious conversation with the agency who employs these carers and insist that they should be required to use English while with your mum. Perhaps they could send carers of different nationalities so that they cannot chatter away in a common language.

 

[Vera's den]

Thank you

Thank you all for your comments. I will try speaking to the carers themselves before going to the agency manager it could be they don't realise the affect this has on mum.